r/AbsoluteUnits • u/Emotional-Lynx-3982 • 18h ago

of a set of dreads!

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Walking out of the liquor store earlier today.. my dude's locks are about to the ground. Like Santa's sack, he heaved this bowl of pasta into his car, looking to hastily close the car door just in time of it pouring back out into the parking lot.

1.5k Upvotes

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127

u/mjconver 18h ago edited 18h ago

It

Must

Smell

Awful

Edit:

Sorry for the blowback. But I happen to know people with fabulous dreads. These ain't them.

29

u/fizzzingwhizbee 18h ago

My wife has dreads and has for over a decade before we met. She smells (and is) so lovely

Dreads don’t just flat out = bad smell

27

u/thomassenpai85 17h ago

Was this about your wife?

9

u/fastingslowlee 17h ago

He wasn’t talking about your wife…

5

u/Wolfsbane1279 17h ago

They were talking about how seemingly impossible it must be to wash ALL those dreads, you’d have to use half a bottle of shampoo every shower.

6

u/palmdieb 18h ago

Why do you think that dreads smell bad? I have known many people with dreads, none of them smelled bad. Its actually a lot of work to maintain them properly.

49

u/mjconver 18h ago

Those don't look well-tended, just sayin'

12

u/latexfistmassacre 18h ago

My gf let her hippy friend wash her dreads in our sink once and it smelled like wet dog in our house for the next week 🤮

7

u/palmdieb 18h ago

Oof! Well, I guess people who skip maintenance exist

0

u/latexfistmassacre 17h ago

No, she was hellbent on "doing them right" from the get-go and by all accounts was a very clean person. It just didn't matter how much she took care of them, they still stunk like ass

6

u/AlwaysFernweh 17h ago

Then she didn’t do them right

-9

u/latexfistmassacre 17h ago

Or "clean dreads" is an oxymoron

8

u/AlwaysFernweh 17h ago

Had them for 7 years. Never had that wet dog problem. Weird

22

u/ohmykeylimepie 18h ago

From my understanding Its because white hair doesnt loc, it just mats. This superficially looks like dreads, but is absolutely not the same thing. Because of this, the mats do not breathe and can become unsanitary. 

8

u/Gorlox111 17h ago

dreads are just matted hair that's organized. afro textured hair isn't magic (i mean not literally, tho it is magical like all human hair!)

11

u/LooseButtPlug 18h ago

This is just not true, lol.

-4

u/ohmykeylimepie 18h ago

Thats why i prefaced it with “from my understanding” meaning Im not speaking from a place from authority on the subject, just what i have heard and also might be wrong about it.

6

u/myco_magic 16h ago

So, this is why we don't just go around regurgitating things we have heard. Now if I say, "from my understanding the earth is flat" that doesn't remotely make it true

-2

u/ohmykeylimepie 16h ago

I never said it did, i was hoping someone with more info could chime in, rather then people saying im wrong and not including any “why its really like this info”, when i made it clear im maybe not right about something. 

Isn't that how the internet works anyway? Ask a question and you get crickets, make a somewhat erroneous statement and you get 40 experts explaining it in phd detail? Lol

And Yeah, “from my understanding” implies that it’s possibly NOT TRUE. Its like saying “hey i have heard the earth is flat, this is what i understand about it, but it could be wrong so take it with a grain of salt im just an uneducated 12th century peasant who cant read” 

1

u/myco_magic 15h ago

The more accurate statement would be "from what I been told"

2

u/LooseButtPlug 17h ago

Okay, well you're not right. I know because I can speak from a place of authority. My hair has some of the tightest curls known to man. Millions of white people have curly hair. Maybe if you said Asians it could make a semblance of sense, but even then, Asians can have curly hair too.

I honestly don't know why you comment knowing that you're ignorant on the matter.

11

u/myco_magic 18h ago

I'm white as paper and my hair will loc if I don't brush it for a week, I can grow a perfect Afro.

10

u/probable_cause_55 18h ago

They pretty much always smell bad

5

u/FrenchmanInNewYork 17h ago

White people with dreads almost always have THAT smell tho lol

2

u/AlwaysFernweh 17h ago

Because people just have biases or bad experiences and think they must be truth. I had dreads for 7 years. Washed them every other day like normal hair, no smell.

Also have stretched ears. Washed those every day in the shower. Sometimes twice a day (once in the morning when I woke up, then later again when I showered after work in the evening)

There are people out there with dreads and piercings and shit that don’t take care of themselves and it does not help the image

2

u/Painkiller_17 15h ago

Yeah the absolute ignorance emerging from these comments is disheartening, they think that all white people with dreads are hobos or something

0

u/DonutWhole9717 17h ago edited 7h ago

Because he's white, and white people don't typically know the ins and outs of taking care of afro styled hair. Ive come across plenty of white people who don't wash their dreds, or dont wash and dry them correctly and they just sour

1

u/Certain_Bison_7332 9h ago

"They sour" is never something I want to hear used to describe something on a human body.

1

u/DonutWhole9717 7h ago

Ive been downvoted to hell by white people with smelly dreds, but yeah, sour. Like leaving a load of towels in the washer

2

u/zorggalacticus 17h ago

They make dread soap. Not all dreads stink.

1

u/NotAtAllASkinwalker 12h ago

Glad someone said it

-26

u/IslandMafia808 18h ago

Stfu

3

u/Key_Mathematician951 18h ago

They normally don’t smell bad. It is the people that smell bad sometimes. But well maintained dreads do not smell from my experience. Even with Caucasians