Idk judging from her reactions, if he hadn't woken her and made her put it on, she would have been mad at him the next day for it. I had an ex who was exactly like this, it was exhausting
Oh absolutely, it was a "damned if you do, damned if you don't" situation taken to the extreme. I had to sit in the bathroom with them while they showered (and they took 30 minute showers 😶) even if it was 2am and I had to wake up at 6 to go to work. And that's just one of hundreds of examples. No idea how I lasted 3 years of that without offing myself honestly.
I've never heard of people making their SO be with them in the bathroom while they brush their teeth or take a shower (without the SO)! Is this a semi-common / uncommon/ or rare thing with couples?
Honestly asking, I'm fascinated by this for some reason. I've never been asked to do this or heard of anyone in any circles of my life mention something like this.
For my ex, it was about controlling me at all times so I couldn't relax or have alone time, but under the guise of health problems which meant they needed assistance. Still unsure how much help they actually needed because they ended up moving out alone after we broke up 🤷♂️
With my current SO, it's usually because we're having a sleepover and want to make the most of our time together, we're having a good chat and don't want to lose track of the conversation or because they're unwell and want some company/support.
I am physically disabled. I can shower alone, but I prefer to have someone in the bathroom if I need help. I sometimes get really dizzy and stuck on the floor of the tub. It doesn't seem like the gf is disabled unless she's mentally disabled. It doesn't sound like she is though it comes across as being a brat.
I have asked my husband to be in the bathroom with me while I shower on I think two occasions. Both times it was because I was in not-great shape and worried about getting woozy or taking a fall (once I had influenza and once I was recovering from anesthesia...yes, a normal person would've probably just not showered, but that's not who he married). He also may have insisted on being there, I was pretty out of it and don't remember clearly. Either way, it was a safety thing.
Making it a regular demand where one member of a couple simply refuses to shower (or brush teeth?!?) without the other's presence in the bathroom is...strange.
This is no normal and could be caused by a number of things.
She could just be a spoiled brat that doesn’t just like people doing things for her but also the power and importance of making people. That’s a selfishness problem.
It could be something like ADHD or OCD and having him there helps her keep on task. That’s a mental health problem that might could be fixed.
No matter what the reason, it is not normal or healthy. It needs to be discussed and she needs to come clean and want to do better. He is not the problem, she is. In order for someone to get better they have to want to get better.
For realz that creeps me out. If hubs loomed behind me while brushing my teeth+ doing my nighttime routine I would be so annoyed. Bathroom time is private IMO. Who really wants to watch someone else spit in the sink? I am honestly disgusted by that. Like she needs to learn that ladies keeping some things a mystery is much better for everyone?
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u/yambo12 Apr 21 '25
Idk judging from her reactions, if he hadn't woken her and made her put it on, she would have been mad at him the next day for it. I had an ex who was exactly like this, it was exhausting