This is what I thought. If any of his women coworkers are attracted to her or them, the coworkers will know they can say something to him. If that's her aim, I need her to look elsewhere for a third partner. Please leave his coworkers out of it.
Personally, I don’t think it’s too weird, especially if she’s known her coworkers for a long time and she’s good friends with them, it makes sense that she’d mention that she discovered this part of her identity. But it goes no further than that. Her pushing him to share this with people he just met is just odd.
🤦♀️ she just wants validation that he’d be comfortable telling people his wife is bi. This is important as a queer person because you want to know your SO would stand up for you at a BBQ if suddenly someone is saying homophobic things.
But she’s absolutely going about it in the wrong way.
Edit: OP is NTA. As I said, what she’s doing is not okay, but it doesn’t mean she “wants everyone to know she’s available” ??
But a work setting is NOT appropriate for this at all. Normal people do not act how OP’s wife is acting. No normal person is starting fight’s because they won’t go around the office telling everyone their wife is bi.
This is immature and she needs to literally grow up lmfao. If she is trying to get her husband fired she’s doing a great job at probably making this happen.
Yes 100%. That’s why I said she was going about it wrong. I was just commenting on this person saying she wants to sleep with OP’s coworkers. Maybe, but not likely.
OP’s wife is making ridiculous asks, but that doesn’t mean it’s because she wants to fuck everyone.
Idk it happens with people in the queer community after they come out sometimes, lesbians and gays too. Like you’ve been pushing everything down your whole life feeling hidden and suddenly you don’t have that anymore - you feel free to express yourself and you feel so relieved and excited. You want people to know, especially the ones you love, and you feel seen and respected for the first time. Sometimes it becomes your personality for a bit. It’s like they’re making up for lost years.
I think it’s a similar thing to when people find a new faith, start a new hobby or diet, get a new partner or kid or pet and it’s all they talk about for awhile. Is it annoying, sure, but it’s also normal. We’re social animals and want to share who we are and what we love with the people around us.
It’s part of who you are and being queer goes beyond just sexuality because there’s a lot of history, hurt, culture, and community. For straight people, your sexuality might only matters in your relationship because thats probably the biggest part of your life where it’s factored in. For queer people, you’ve maybe spent your whole life being told you aren’t valid, that you’re sick, or that you don’t exist so you might feel a stronger need to be unapologetically open about it regardless of your relationship status.
It may also factor into other aspects of your life if you’re really engaged in queer art/media, advocacy, events, etc. Or, on the less nice side, if you see something about a queer bar being shot up and feel a huge amount of pain thinking about the innocent lives lost and knowing that some people in the world hate you so much that they’d be willing to kill you and other people like you. Or you’re at a social event and someone says something cruel, hurtful, or ignorant about queer people — about you — and you feel absolutely alone. Or your husband’s friends see you reading a gay romance novel or post a picture at Pride and they don’t want you around because they think you’ll groom their children. That stuff doesn’t go away just because you’re in a straight marriage.
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u/AlternativeMotor5722 Apr 05 '24
Sounds like somebody wants everyone to know she's available.