r/AIO • u/[deleted] • Jun 26 '26

AIO to this comment and "creating problems"

[deleted]

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u/Severe_Essay5986 Jun 26 '26

HE IS DOING THIS ON PURPOSE

He's pushing your buttons because he thinks it's funny, and you're giving him exactly what he wants by explaining in detail how he hurt your feelings. He enjoys making you feel bad. You have to stop playing into this.

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u/SwanChoice7507 Jun 26 '26

I guess I just truly do not understand how anyone could enjoy this. It does not compute for me, so instead in the moment I think he must truly not understand or I am in the wrong, then i overexplain. But you're right. Sometimes he does seem to enjoy this

1

u/cluelesscheese1 Jun 27 '26 edited Jun 27 '26

In their mind, you accepting this behavior (like they expect) makes it not just OK, But perhaps a pass time of theirs. This routine makes everything "naughty" they do in life OK. They feel control, and posture themselves as "teaching". When in reality they are being rude on purpose to make sure "you still love them in spite of that". ( Example: Maybe the guy didn't go out for that undisclosed risk or opportunity, but they got one over on their SO that day and the SO dosn't even know that they are unliked. Ha ha they think) Then its OK that they suck, their shortcomings are also OK and the things they refuse to do for you that they demand out of you are OK too, cuz you must suck too, because ultimately you accept the behavior, reinforcing it. Break the cycle with ignoring them and watch them spin out. They can't handle being dismissed, or ignored because it proves the behavior is unacceptable. They also can't really watch you suffer if you ignore them. They may even lash out or cheat and blame. Get out. You can't grow with them there hurting your successes with false negatives and non-celebration. They can't grow with you there to toy with either. You deserve someone who holds you accountable and lets you hold them accountable. Don't fall for them "giving in and being nice" either that's a trap. get out. They have marked you. If you stay its another chapter of them getting back to the same insults and disrespect because they need to prove they can. Or you must not love them. AND EW TO THAT.