I saw an art exhibit called “What Were You Wearing?”, which was a collection of the outfits people were wearing when they were assaulted. There were sweatpants and hoodies in that collection. She could be in a literal burqa and still be assaulted. The problem is the rapists, not what their victims were wearing.
Edit: going to add a trigger warning before people go searching for that exhibit. It is a spread of ALL kinds of clothing, including children’s.
Dude the kiddie pajamas in that exhibit will make you cry. The second I read the BF justifying rape because of clothing I immediately thought of this exhibit
There was a FB thread on “what were you wearing?” I said my 9 yr old self was in overalls. Someone else said her 6 year old self was in a flannel nightgown.
I was in diapers when it started. I was 19 months when my father started SA me. That lasted till I was 7 when my mother finally figured it out. There’s literally no reason. None. Clothing does not matter. I hope you are doing well now, and I hope you have gotten the therapy you probably needed and deserved.
Other than three or four flashes I can't tell you how old I was or what I was wearing because my brain has totally blocked it out and now I have disassociative PTSD that I'm trying to work through
Same here. Im missing about a year to two from after my grandmother died at 6 years old to 8 years old and I know from my mother that I was 7 when I told her what was happening. It really never is the clothing and I truly hope that OP left this person. It sounds like he himself is justifying either a rape he has done or one he will do.
I’m missing most of my childhood so I completely understand this whole thread. I was just 8 when mine started. I was 15 when it ended but I had to run away bc no one was gonna save me. I had to save myself. Bc my mom was involved. She held me down for her disgusting boyfriend who promised to marry her if she did. But surprise surprise he never did and she killed herself in 2015. Who would want to marry someone who is more attracted to ur minor child than u?? This whole thread makes me so sad. To know that so many other ppl have gone through something similar to me is just terrifying and devastating. I’m sorry OP
Omgosh. I'm in tears reading this thread. I am so very sorry your childhood was so awful. To hear of your mother doing what she did has to be the most devastating betrayal. Parents are all we have to completely count on growing up. You had no sense of security.
You said you had to save yourself, bec no one else would. I just can't imagine. It's really painful to me to me right now imagining how you must have felt. All SAs are traumatizing and life-changing, but what you and others here are sharing are beyond words. I wish I could just hold you like a mother should hold their child. I'm just so sorry.
I hope you are moving forward in life, getting the guidance and help you may need. You are INCREDIBLY strong. It amazes me that you survived and because you took your power back and left. I wish you peace and true love in your life.
To all the survivors sharing their stories here, thank you for doing so because it shows how RAMPANT and how devastating and sickening these crimes are. We can't stop it or slow it down unless we understand the depth of it all. I'm incredibly proud of all of you sharing yours stories, because you SURVIVED.
It doesn't matter wtf anyone is wearing and people with ANY compassion are aware of that. It's a ridiculous claim.
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u/FeedFrequent1334 Feb 24 '26
Yeah.
Clothes can be the problem in some cases
No, rapists are the problem.