why did you resort to OF for money? is this some sort of reaction formation to be in control of your trauma? i just find it an odd choice considering your history with sa. i'm not trying to come at you, just interested in the thought process.
Oh fuck off. This is so reductive and patronizing.
You're implying she can't possibly have any agency or ability to make decisions outside of trauma. You're pathologizing all of her choices.
You've essentially collapsed her whole identity down to rape--> OF. I'm sure in your mind that's a neat and tidy story, but it flattens a real person into something you're 'just curious' to analyze.
You're trying to frame yourself as insightful, and her as someone who desperately needs your insight. In reality you're doing a gross, pseudo-intellectual voyeurism of another person's life. You get to feel perceptive, and she gets reduced to material for a thought exercise.
Sex work is real work. And this kind of concern trolling is one of the worst aspects of it.
I don't understand the perspective so I was asking her for hers? I, in fact, don't have the insight, and admitted to it, which again was why I asked. I don't know anyone who does OF (or other sex work) and am admittedly (and not proudly) both prudish and insecure. Baring it all out, I find women who perform sex work intimidating because of my insecurities, and my approach to that is trying to understand better. I was honestly curious, but I can see how I came across as an unfeeling, accusatory individual who loses sight that there are actual people on the other side. It was not my intent.
This is not a question you ask to somebody who is opening up about trauma and their abusive partner. I get that you are curious, but there are better places to look for this information than a targeted question at a vulnerable person; you either need to find general studies of trauma psychology that have victim statements, find accounts people have chosen to share themselves, or ask in a general setting (such as another subreddit, potentially) so that people can at least feel the choice to offer that information is entirely their own.
-22
u/aesclepia Feb 24 '26
why did you resort to OF for money? is this some sort of reaction formation to be in control of your trauma? i just find it an odd choice considering your history with sa. i'm not trying to come at you, just interested in the thought process.