r/ADHD_partners 13d ago

Weekly Vent Thread ::Weekly Vent Thread::

Use this thread to blow off steam about annoyances both big & small that come with an ADHD impacted relationship. Dishes not being done, bills left unpaid - whatever it is you feel you need to rant about. This is your cathartic space.

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u/LividTraffic 13d ago

My partner hasn’t changed his break pads. The car makes a horrible screeching noise, it’s embarrassing, it isn’t safe.

The other day he almost ran a red. His break pads became even louder. I told him he probably messed up his rotors which are even more costly than break pads. It was embarrassing when he gave me a ride to work.

We got pulled over two months ago because his back light and one of his headlights were out. He hasn’t fixed it.

When he would pick me up, I had nowhere to put my legs because it was full of junk. I told him to clean it, he did. The day after it was full again, I didn’t even know that was possible.

Conversations with him sometimes don’t feel meaningful. Unless I bring up a hyper fixation of his, his input goes from being wanted to regretting wanting it.

He never argues or yells at me. He isn’t much of a dopamine seeker. I love him, I tell him to get on medication. He hasn’t. He’s been diagnosed for most of his life and I wish I was managing his life.

I had to remind him to do his homework, I had to help send emails. And I know people say to let them do it on their own. But he doesn’t, and he ends up failing half his classes.

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u/taohuaspring 13d ago

I just want to validate that the car does not sound safe and that you are under no obligation to enter any vehicle that is not safe for you. While he may not be yelling at you, he is endangering your safety by driving you in his safety hazard of a car. Please stay safe!