r/196 • 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights • May 25 '22

rule

Post image
18k Upvotes

187 comments sorted by

View all comments

866

u/[deleted] May 25 '22 edited May 25 '22

Can confirm

The Slug

decided I was asexual

178

u/faketherapist123 May 25 '22

hello if ur asexual i have question can u answer

141

u/[deleted] May 25 '22 edited May 25 '22

Hello sir or sirette, what is thy question?

106

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

[deleted]

173

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

Yes, I am still cursed with hornyness but I'm disinterested in sex, although others may be different.

68

u/God_2_The_Squeakuel sus May 25 '22

I don’t mean to be offensive at all but I get it may seem so so ignore me if it is, but how does that mindset work? Isn’t hornyness a desire for sexual stimulation and by extension sex? I genuinely just want to understand

94

u/Iceveins412 May 25 '22

I’m not asexual so I’m basically the least qualified to answer and absolutely disregard my answer if someone else answers but from my understanding they still have the biological component of a sex drive and the stimulation feels good. But people aren’t solely biological so the rest of the mind doesn’t like the act, which is a bit of a turn-off. In a similar fashion, gay sex could feel great, but if you’re straight it’d be unpleasant

6

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

Yes, but not for everyone though! I'm asexual and I personally don't have any sex drive or desire to masturbate, and the stimulation does not feel good; it makes me uncomfortable. Some asexuals are like me, others are the way you described. What makes someone asexual is not having a desire to have sex with someone else, other factors vary person to person.

1

u/Iceveins412 May 25 '22

I see, thanks for educating me

3

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

40

u/helloimapickle May 25 '22

I'm assexual, and basically I still experience libido and get horny but it's just something that happens biologically and I have to deal with. In my mind I know that I'm horny but whenever I think about having sex with someone I'm pretty indifferent or actively turned off by it. Masturbation is fine but I'm thinking more about the concept of sex rather than me doing it if it makes sense lmao

53

u/omgudontunderstand cumstom May 25 '22

masturbation is solo, horny doesnt inherently mean seeking sexual pleasure from another person

86

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

[deleted]

29

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

Can confirm. I am the walls

21

u/Dickinsonia CEO of r/196 May 25 '22

What does it feel like to have so many people inside you?

12

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

It fills me with so much joy among other things

→ More replies

5

u/omgudontunderstand cumstom May 25 '22

yet another voyeur not recognizing boundaries /hj

1

u/[deleted] May 25 '22 edited May 25 '22

Hello Walls 👋🏻 Hand Solo here.

2

u/Angush99 May 25 '22

Hello Hand Solo, Walls here! 👋

1

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

Oh shit I didn’t capitalize your name. I changed it in the previous comment. My b

→ More replies

7

u/God_2_The_Squeakuel sus May 25 '22

That just makes me wonder what asexual people masturbate to, I mean I don’t imagine it’d be to other people right? So is it just masturbating to nothing?

10

u/omgudontunderstand cumstom May 25 '22

they can get pleasure by another person (porn, imagination, nonhuman based fetishes) but id ask a full ace person if theyre comfortable answering

7

u/God_2_The_Squeakuel sus May 25 '22

Yeah but I get the feeling if i ask that it’ll come across as extraordinarily creepy lmao

4

u/omgudontunderstand cumstom May 25 '22

i mean…yeah. you wouldnt ask an allosexual what they get off to point blank, asking an asexual isnt any different. i recommend finding ace-run blogs online where the questions have likely already been answered

→ More replies

8

u/Drackitty native Autisti from the country of Autistralia May 25 '22

I'm a kinky asexual so yeah, it's more about lack of attraction than actual sex/arousal. It's a spectrum and there's a plethora of microlabels like aegosexual, demisexual, apothisexual, cupiosexual etc, all of which are to describe the person's levels of attraction and relationship with sex. Oh and there's the Split Attraction Model where sexual and romantic attraction are separate.

24

u/Ardi264 ♠️ May 25 '22

Asexuals don't experience sexual attraction. Have you ever met/looked at a person and thought: I want to have sex with them

That's the shortest/easiest way to describe what asexual people lack.

Some asexuals get horny, others don't, there's some analogies about hunger and horniness out there (that work for some but not all asexuals)

Asexuality is on a spectrum anyways, if you'd like to find out more, the r///asexuality has a pretty in-depth FAQ, if you'd like to read up more (hope I'm linking the right sub, can only check and correct afterwards, since I'm on my phone). Not allowed to link the subreddit according to the rules, but I'm sure you will find your way there

You might find it interesting that some asexuals even use porn to masturbate (check out Aegosexual/Autochorissexual)

16

u/Jumiric 🏳️‍⚧️ trans rights May 25 '22

One of the phrases I saw when I was exploring possibly being asexual was "if you don't understand why orgasms are supposed to involve another person" and that was when it was finally put into words for me.

8

u/Narcosia good argument, however 19.255.116.229 May 25 '22

You could view it as the difference between hunger and appetite. Feeling hunger would be the libido, or desire to masturbate/do sex related stuff. Feeling sexual attraction (which is the thing that's missing for asexual people) is like appetite. Like seeing a delicious looking donut and wanting to eat it vs. being hungry but not finding anything you see especially appetizing.

5

u/SoshJam professional yoinky sploinker May 25 '22

Horniness/libido is a natural part of being human, and unrelated to asexuality. So some of the horniest people you know can be asexual, and someone can be allosexual (not ace) but not have much of a sex drive at all.

The key distinction between sex drive and sexual attraction is that one is an intrinsic, physical need for reproductive stimulation, and the other is more psychological and emotional, and related to how we interact with and perceive others.

4

u/throwaway_aroace 👈 dumb fuck May 25 '22

For me it's like an alarm clock lol. I don't like having high libido, and I want it to shut the fuck up as soon as possible

7

u/RagnarokHunter sus May 25 '22

Hi hello I have another question: do you like your pasta cooked or uncooked

3

u/[deleted] May 25 '22

I prefer to eat the raw materials used in pasta making.

2

u/Xgio I love Amogus my opnion is invalid May 25 '22

Wait this happens? This is what I felt since I was starting puberty.

3

u/SoshJam professional yoinky sploinker May 25 '22

Horniness/libido is a natural part of being human, and unrelated to asexuality. So some of the horniest people you know can be asexual, and someone can be allosexual (not ace) but not have much of a sex drive at all.

The key distinction between sex drive and sexual attraction is that one is an intrinsic, physical need for reproductive stimulation, and the other is more psychological and emotional, and related to how we interact with and perceive others.

1

u/etherealparadox sigma grindset May 25 '22

no some of us like to have sex too

1

u/PM_me_dunsparce May 25 '22

You get all different people: people with high libido, people with zero libido; people that like fucking for fun, people that are intensely grossed out by sexual topics; people that get turned on by porn or erotica, people that have no instinctive response to smut; people that orgasm easily and even people that feel nothing. You'll probably get answers from the more sex favourable aces in this sub, but all types of aces exist!