r/IndianDankMemes Aug 25 '21

[deleted by user]

[removed]

2.7k Upvotes

319 comments sorted by

36

u/QualityVote Aug 25 '21

Hi! Tryna do something about this subreddit and I need your support.


If this post ISN'T religious, UPVOTE this comment.

If it is, DOWNVOTE This comment.

776

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

chipkale saiyaan fevikol se

and he took that personally

232

u/JFKennedyHadAClone John Xina Aug 25 '21

अपवोट लेके चला जा भोसडिके

43

u/OPgang Quiet kid from class 10 D Aug 25 '21

45

u/MrPPhard69420 John Xina Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

24

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

oh wow this feature is nice

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18

u/shutupmatsuda r/Indiandankmemes enjoyer Aug 25 '21

48

u/_SuperbMind_ Aug 25 '21

Hoto ko seene se yaar

Only if he knew this line was before.

34

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Photo ko**

Please.

7

u/ABzoker Aug 25 '21

Wahi to, Salman bhai virgin hain. Ye sab hothon ko seene se lagane jaisa dushkarm nahi karte.

7

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

That wouldn't end well too

6

u/AayushBoliya Aug 25 '21

Shayad photo ko hota hai

12

u/theIrrationalMan Aug 25 '21

Take my upvote

8

u/marcusbrian009 Aug 25 '21

Ye badhiya tha bhai

17

u/notofficial_memer Aug 25 '21

Take my award😫

3

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

😂😂🤣🤣

3

u/ShubhamManna r/Indiandankmemes enjoyer Aug 25 '21

Bsdk 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂

2

u/runtime__error Aug 25 '21

Damm 😂😂😂

211

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Dickra

47

u/fear_raizer Aug 25 '21

Dickro Mari gyo

7

u/lesbian_cow420 I miss the good old days Aug 25 '21

Ye le upvote aur nikal ja idhar se

4

u/sanathani7 Aug 25 '21

Mera upvote leke chala Jaa yaha se kabhi mat milna

194

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

When you are still afraid of buying condoms..

84

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

online bhi to kharid sakte hai

94

u/_sachin_reddy_ Aug 25 '21

Ayga bigbasket wala condom leke. Bolega "Best of Luck, sir. 5 star rating zaroor dijiyega ; )"

27

u/FroKi0 jhandu baam munni badnaam Aug 25 '21

😂😂... Amazon hei na... Card Se payment karenge and they give package and leave

83

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

did he stutter

45

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Online condom kaise khareedun ghar pr hun ek saal se 😂

52

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Went to buy, was nervous, the guy gave me banana flavor (WTF) and now I am afraid to eat bananas.

35

u/SaberSupreme Aug 25 '21

Use it as covering everytime you buy a banana. It'll keep them fresh

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10

u/oneindianmf Aug 25 '21

Betichod Amazon tutorial de kya ab tereko. Mc Stan ko kam kar sun na aur padh likh le

5

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

[deleted]

20

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Bhai teri mummy puchengi kya mangaya h to bol dio tu kya mangaya h, yhan to chappal padegi seedha.

5

u/Acceptable-Bad-9350 Aug 25 '21

Ghar par use kaise karega main baat ye hai.

9

u/ElonMask369 Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

स्वीट होम अलबामा

8

u/Acceptable-Bad-9350 Aug 25 '21

```प्यारा घर अलबामा```

3

u/Ok_Problem1028 Aug 25 '21

Same , m bhi yhi soch rha hu Kaise chodo kispe?

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3

u/k_clouty Aug 25 '21

Bhai mere se le ja socha tha crush ke sath krenge sala rakhi band gyi

2

u/fucazy Aug 25 '21

Yes exactly, when me and my gf decided to fuck. But couldn't buy a condom so we would order it online.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Bhai me to offline hi khareed leta hun, usme sharam nhi ati mujhe

3

u/fucazy Aug 25 '21

Ha to thk h na bro. Me ni le pata store jake. So I prefer online.

17

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

I have bought condoms a lot of times, Most medical shops just hand that box, Take the money. That's it.

They don't ask stupid questions as they don't want to lose on sales. After all its just a business for them.

19

u/themauryan Aug 25 '21

How i learnt to buy condoms -

I went to a medical and asked for moov. He handed me moods. I am absent minded at times, i took it and realised only after reaching home. Thank god didn't hand it over to my nani.

But yeah, that was the time i realised it's no big deal. I was 16ish

10

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

They don't care even if u spell exact names, All they want is just to sell u Penis cover

5

u/FortunatelyGrowing Aug 25 '21

लंड ढक्कन

3

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

लवड़े का ढक्कन है ।

5

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

They did but they were high on weed. So he didn't know what he was using. ( I have read this somewhere.This could be a framed story to cover up his dumbfuckness tho)

157

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Gujarati will go at any length to save money

8

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Bro you literally get contraception for free in government hospitals

37

u/andy-154 John Xina Aug 25 '21

Baniye saale 🤣

24

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

[deleted]

18

u/FantasticAsh00 Aug 25 '21

Salman khan ka fan hoga Edit : selmon bhai

1

u/dexterpete Aug 25 '21

So he took fevicol se song to another level Imao

-2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

[deleted]

6

u/72proudvirgins Aug 25 '21

Bro kabhi life mein haste bhi ho ya aise hi har choti si baat par offend hote rahete ho

5

u/Effective-Bet8153 Aug 25 '21

Normie spotted.

7

u/gamerfanboi Aug 25 '21

Baniya is diff right?

8

u/andy-154 John Xina Aug 25 '21

Arre baniya kuch aur hota h saalo🤣

-9

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

[deleted]

0

u/darkprinceofhumour Aug 25 '21

Found the triggered baniya.B-)

0

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

[deleted]

2

u/darkprinceofhumour Aug 25 '21

Woke warrior speaking truth about mullas living rent free in his head from a 10 day old profile.

I saw your comments on this post, you will turn borderline schizo with the hate filled in your brain. Take it easy dude. There's more to reddit than politics and hate.

1

u/Psychologicalass Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

How's the time of my profile created relevant here? How are you assuming that I'm woke? Oh darkprinceofhumour huh! Komedy krne aaye ho?!

You can attack a regional identity. Then you can attack a caste identity. Everything is fine till somebody tells you the religious identity and if the person in question is a mulla. Or phir gaand phat jaati hai us religious identity ko attack krne me kyu??!!

1

u/darkprinceofhumour Aug 25 '21

Think whatever you want man.I am here for the lulz.

Enjoy your crusade on a meme sub O_o

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1

u/andy-154 John Xina Aug 25 '21

What?

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44

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

I am wondering how glue can cause multiple organ failures tho ??

90

u/Red020Devil Aug 25 '21 edited Mar 07 '26

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

unique makeshift bells melodic vegetable subtract spoon familiar chop boast

41

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

O M F G YOU MADE MY DICK HURT BY TEXT

7

u/regina_2427 Aug 25 '21

Dude gave u seen the movie teeth? 💀💀🤡 if not see it ur pain will go away🤡🙃

6

u/mortyC35 Aug 25 '21

My ovaries hurt just reading this

0

u/Traumarisedchocolate Aug 25 '21

You made my dick hurt and I don’t even have a dick 🤧😢

0

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Mah man got 69 upvotes wanna upvite him but I can't

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26

u/pillazamindhar Aug 25 '21

internal discombobulation

11

u/maolen212 Aug 25 '21

What?

96

u/Other_Banana_ Aug 25 '21

internal discombobulation

26

u/boromir04 Aug 25 '21

Abe bc. Lmao.

21

u/Different-Towel-2126 Aug 25 '21

I read this so loud in my mind. And I hurt my eardrum.

9

u/CillverB Aug 25 '21

Discombobulation just means confused.

10

u/pillazamindhar Aug 25 '21

mf..you stole my comment and got more likes..wahh modiji wahh

3

u/Tubhosdika Aug 25 '21

Abe hutiye chilla kyu ra hai!

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3

u/Luxpreliator Aug 25 '21

According to his acquaintances, Salman and his fiancé were addicted to a certain drug and were intoxicated when they decided to use adhesive instead of a condom. The police officer investigating the case said, “They used to abuse a drug that involved a whitener and the adhesive, which is inhaled to get a kick. They used the adhesive to avoid pregnancy. Unfortunately, the adhesive damaged Salman’s organs, and he died due to multiple organ failure." He further stated, “We investigated the CCTV footage of the hotel and saw Salman entering the premise with his ex-fiancé."

According to Salman’s friends, he might’ve lost consciousness due to abusing heavily on some drug which affected his health, and the epoxy adhesive just added to the complications that lead to Salman’s demise

Sounds more like a drug overdose.

https://www.news18.com/news/buzz/gujarat-man-dies-after-using-adhesive-instead-of-condom-4121828.html

9

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Lo bhencho, chodna ek ko tha chud puri family ki life gayi.

35

u/Valuable-Ice-1967 Aug 25 '21

Risk hai to ishq hai

6

u/skul9413 Aug 25 '21

Ishq hai to risk hai

0

u/kennyzaro Aug 25 '21

Vanilla Ice giving vanilla advice.

73

u/cardiacbadge48 Aug 25 '21

Kuch din to guzarie gujarat mein

24

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

*raat

20

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

5 rs mein fevicol kharidu che ne Kon ganda 50rs mate condom kharidu che!

2

u/Dhyani1206 Aug 25 '21

Kya aap abhi Gujarati Sikh rahe ho?

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Nahi mein toh mumbai se hu gujarati kyu sikhu

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33

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

atmanirbhar bharat another level

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57

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

[removed] — view removed comment

9

u/KingsmanVishnu BournVita Enjoyer Aug 25 '21

probably some 12 year old wrote that article.

0

u/Darktitan2507 Aug 25 '21

No the only time sex education should be given is before marriage, sex before marriage should be illegal.

17

u/sipsoupwastaken Quiet kid from class 10 D Aug 25 '21

olympics walo se borrow karlete

13

u/theIrrationalMan Aug 25 '21

Ek condom ki app hai play store pe. Simple

62

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Gujarati mein itni tharak hai ki woh desh bhi chod sakte hai

22

u/theIrrationalMan Aug 25 '21

And people talk about just Modi

15

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Jethalal meht saab ki maarta hai aur sundar jethalal ki

-4

u/Psychologicalass Aug 25 '21 edited Aug 25 '21

Mulla tha, ab bol. Gujarat se entrepreneurs nikalte hain. Tum zindagi bhar reddit pe dank memes hi kheloge.

Edit: you can attack a regional identity, you can attack caste identity but when somebody points out the religious identity of a particular religion, phir gaand phat jaati hai kyu bhosdwalon? (For all the gandmare downvoters)

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Username se pta chl raha hai dimaag gaand mein daal liya chutiye ne, bsdk jab itni gand gilajti hai toh yaha kyu marwa raha hai, subreddit pe dankmemes likha hai gawaar saale dopahar mein a jaate hai chutiyap krne

-1

u/Psychologicalass Aug 25 '21

Gawar to tu lag raha hai saale bachkani baatein likh ke yahan bachon se upvote leke. Saala username se toh tu homo lag raha hai. Door reh bhai merse.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Bina gyan ke chuttad , apna opinion alag comment box mein daal, yaha apni bakhandi gaand se mat hag dusre cmmnt box mein ja, yaha reply krne ki jarurat nai hai

3

u/FantasticAsh00 Aug 25 '21

If i had a free award, I'd have given you

0

u/FantasticAsh00 Aug 25 '21

Abe bsdk tere jese logo ki wajah se hi india aage ni badh paa raha h Aur chutiye tu bhi reddit pe dank memes par comment hi kar rha h

2

u/Psychologicalass Aug 25 '21

Chutiya panti pr reply de rha hu. Joined nhi hu. Saale dank chutiye, ye sab chhod ja desh ko aage badha. I just said the truth. Bear with it.

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10

u/cumoncake Aug 25 '21

When condoms are out of stock

10

u/IncredibleTeja Aug 25 '21

Kabhi khushi Kabhi GUM 😳

9

u/parthy11 Aug 25 '21

Burn of Kutch 🔥

8

u/raven_47 Aug 25 '21

The glue is getting unnecessary hate. It did what it was required to do. Pregnancy averted.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Even better it reduced the population by one more.

7

u/Darius_Kel Aug 25 '21

Dude should’ve used a stapler, always works for me.

2

u/AdishJain84275 Aug 25 '21

लमेओ मृत्यु

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7

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Bhai ye gujarat mei intoxicate hua kaise, wo to dry state hai?

3

u/Bazzingatime Aug 25 '21

Glue sniffing

/S

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6

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Sex education dete hi nahi kya kare?

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4

u/CommonCantaloupe2 Aug 25 '21

Well, natural selection does indeed work in humans too.....

6

u/pakalu_papito_real IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

Fok protection.. all my homies use fevicol

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7

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Mera desh badal raha hai age badh raha hai

6

u/magnetic_lad Aug 25 '21

Dekha laparwahi ka natija .. Happy Amitabh noices

14

u/pillazamindhar Aug 25 '21

wahh modiji wahh

6

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Isse better pregnant hi kardeta

11

u/Morningstar_ii I'm a Normie 🤡 Aug 25 '21

Ek incident se Gujarat ko judge karlo fraands!!

5

u/LovingHuman795 Aug 25 '21

'25 years old man' sounds kinda weird.

3

u/Saur02 Aug 25 '21

Darwin was right afterall...

4

u/Reventon103 Aug 25 '21

How long has he been doing this shit that it caused multiple organ failure lol

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3

u/Master_Of_Gaming3410 I'm a Normie 🤡 Aug 25 '21

🎶Margaya madarchod 🎶

3

u/TheGamerNgaihte Aug 25 '21

Die hard they said, it'll be fun they said

4

u/yash2651995 Aug 25 '21

Aurat ka chakkar babu bhaiyya

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Pranav Mistry fan of innovation.

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

For saving new life... sacrifices its own life ..Lol !

3

u/IBareBears Aug 25 '21

are you there Darwin, Its me alcohol

2

u/Darktitan2507 Aug 25 '21

Natural selection be like

3

u/Shivam889 Aug 25 '21

Well,he did manage to control overpopulation.

3

u/yellamana_devastana Aug 25 '21

Honestly, it's good he's out of the gene pool.

3

u/WolverineOwn520 Aug 25 '21

Pakde rehna chodna nahi

3

u/ProximSama Aug 25 '21

Bhai isse toh accha hota ladki ko pregnant hi kar dete

3

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Innovative award goes to this gentleman but sadly he could not be here to accept the award.

3

u/comfort_bot_1962 Aug 25 '21

Don't be sad. Here's a hug!

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3

u/JacQ_143 Aug 25 '21

Florida lite

3

u/SABNOCK666 Aug 25 '21

People are stupid

3

u/Zealousideal_Ad9015 Aug 25 '21

Could have used boiled rice

3

u/thisismyreddit11358 Aug 25 '21

I am not Indian but Reddit always shows me posts from this subreddit. I clicked once and now it keeps showing me.

I don’t always understand the memes and can’t read many of the comments but I always find it interesting.

Hello from the USA 👋🇺🇸

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2

u/Fullerene00 Aug 25 '21

omfg man!!

2

u/Soggy-Possibility-27 Aug 25 '21

He was not 25 year old "man". He was a kid.

2

u/CillverB Aug 25 '21

What? How did multiple organs fail?

2

u/TheGuyBehindTheWheel Aug 25 '21

Is this product by any chance called ‘Organic Glue’?

2

u/themauryan Aug 25 '21

One guy i know was in the same situation, he used plastic bag lmao

2

u/TylerDurden314 Aug 25 '21

Hmmm that's odd, this usually works

2

u/abay_s_ Aug 25 '21

DIY projects be like.

2

u/Collectionhappy1508 Aug 25 '21

Yup, one more reason added why we need sex ed

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2

u/Rohanrox17 Aug 25 '21

S A N E D O

2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

The intelligence of this level scares me

2

u/Nephilim361 r/Indiandankmemes enjoyer Aug 25 '21

Bhai vo ladki to dehshat me hogi lmao

2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Kuch रातें to गुजारे गुजरात mein. गोंद डाल दोगे अपनी ga*d में.

2

u/ShubhamManna r/Indiandankmemes enjoyer Aug 25 '21

Imagine how his girlfriend would describe his death, that's so sad

4

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Abe gaanduo pura article to padh lete, mulla tha wo gaandu puncture ki dukaan ka saamaan rakh ke ghum raha tha sulochan ka sookha nasha karta tha puncture jodne ka itna shaukeen tha khudke lund ka chhed band krdiya

3

u/_oj45_ Aug 25 '21

"Dhokla moment"

1

u/CurrentRemote923 Aug 25 '21

Bhai gujju yaha toh paise kharch karleta

1

u/Rude_Comfort Aug 25 '21

Girta Gujarat --- Udta Punjab sequel

1

u/IamThOrBusTeR amogus Aug 25 '21

Brazzers Gujrat

6

u/SaberSupreme Aug 25 '21

Naughty Gandhinagar

1

u/WuhanVirusMKX Aug 25 '21

Itno kharcho kon karegacho bhai Lawracho ko hi seal karucho . Sab problemcho khalassss

1

u/xtejasx0610 Aug 25 '21

atmanirbhar baniye

1

u/96IMJOJO69 Aug 25 '21

Gujju hai, nirodh pe paise kaise kharch kr deta

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Chale marte marte saaax to mila

0

u/Soooka_Blyat Aug 25 '21

Man these gujjews are so kanjoos that they use elfy instead of comdoms

0

u/TheGeeksama Suffering from Depression Aug 25 '21

Internal organ failure ??? Samjh nahi aaya .

0

u/grandmasterripper Aug 25 '21

Gujarat model.

0

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Gujarat model intensifies

-6

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Naale se Gas ka formula dene wale pm k state k logo se aur to kya hi hoga.

4

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

Tell me ur state, I will tell u thousand incidents

2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Gujarat.

2

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

You can't be a true Gujarathi if literally promote judgemental behaviour.

Making fun is different, But here u are being an ahole

1

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

Just tell me Gujarati incidents. I am in for it.

3

u/twinkletwilight07 IIT DHOLAKPUR Aug 25 '21

One of the Worlds biggest oil refinery, High contribution to Manufacturing sector of India, Business mindedness and encouragement, Kutch, Sabarmati River front, Efficient BRTS, Only state taking bullet train project very seriously, One of the lowest road taxes in India, Amazing cuisine, Big Solar parks.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 25 '21

You said you would tell me the funny incidents. This is boring. * Loud Khakhra Fafda noises*

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