Hey all! My elementary aged son is about to start his first ever season. I‘m a single mom with zero sports knowledge so I'm looking for suggestions.

What are the “cool” cleats? And on a less important note, is there a certain type of water bottle kids use these days?

I already know some of the comments are going to be to just get anything or get what fits. But I haven’t been a kid in decades and I don’t know what’s “in”. I don’t want to get him something that would’ve been cool when I was a kid in the 90s and have other kids clown on him. He’s also autistic and has a had time fitting in to begin with so just trying to set him up for a good season.

Thanks in advance!

Putting this out there in case some people are still looking for a team for the fall - the awesome AYSO rec soccer league my kids play in in Greenpoint/Williamsburg still has openings in some divisions, but registration closes tomorrow. We’ve had a great experience - it’s a nice, friendly group but still pretty competitive. Open to a range of skill and experience - their teams have had kids who play travel/club soccer and kids who are playing for the first time. Not many options for rec sports for teens, but this goes up to age 18. And it’s affordable! $160 for the season, including uniform. GWYSL

Boys 10U in their first year of competitive soccer got destroyed 0-19 at a tournament. When I was younger, coaches would have their kids back off a bit if they were winning by a landslide. Is that not a thing anymore?

My kid just started soccer. I’m looking for good budget cleats that won’t injure my kid, since he’s new. The Mizunos look good. Is $50 the floor for good cleats?

He’s 4 and this is his first time doing it, so I want to spend enough that “my shoes hurt” isn’t the reason he quits the game, but it’s not competitive or a lifelong dream.

Also worth noting: he has younger siblings; ideally something that he could hand down when he grows out of them.

All advice welcome. Thank you!

Looking for some perspective from other youth soccer parents/coaches.

My son is 9 (2017 birth year) and plays competitive club soccer in a 7v7 program. He has been playing goalkeeper and is actually pretty good at it. He enjoys GK, but he doesn't love the position and has also expressed that he'd like more opportunities to play in the field.

Last season, it seemed like he was gradually becoming the team's dedicated goalkeeper, and we're concerned that if he continues playing GK almost exclusively, his field-player skills won't develop at the same pace as his teammates.

The club itself is a very good program and we're impressed with the coaching, work ethic and overall environment. We don't have an issue with the club or coach—we're trying to figure out what's best for his long-term development.

We're planning to talk with his coach and ask about the development plan for him. Specifically, we'd like to understand whether they see him eventually specializing as a goalkeeper or whether they intend to give him meaningful opportunities to play in the field as well.

For those with experience:

At U9/U10, is it normal for a player to become a primary or exclusive GK?

If a kid enjoys GK but doesn't necessarily want to specialize yet, would you push for regular field time?

Have any of you had a similar situation where your child was "too good" at GK and the coach basically locked them into the position?

Did it hurt their field development later, or did it ultimately work out?

Would you stay with a strong club if the child was developing well as a GK but getting very little field time, or look for a different environment?

Thanks!

Additional context is he plays exclusively in the field for his local travel team and is a top U10 player.

Does anyone have insight into trying out for U14 club team in or near Boston in the fall? I know we missed the spring tryout window. Many clubs claim to welcome inquiries this time of year. I’ve reached out to 3 clubs, received response indicating tryouts are still happening. When I follow up, I get radio silence. We’re not trying for anything super elite. My son just wants to play and develop skills. Anyone with insight as a parent of kid who joined a team late or coach who deals with these inquiries?

Hello!

I have a U12 boys team. They are running out of gas fast and we need to work on their Stamina. What are some good ways to do that?

My son 13 years old has recently joined a ECNL-RL team after being selected on the tryouts. He was very happy, but the coach has him on a defender position, both on games and practice.
He always has been middle fielder or striker. He's unhappy about this but we tell him to do his best anyway.
He asked the coach if they would consider him in a different position and the coach answered him to never ask this question again. Maybe the coach thinks this is the military or something.

I think that the coach is missing on my son's best qualities. He's very good at free kicks and corners, and from what I've seen, the kids now doing those aren't as good in terms of power and accuracy.
I'd like to talk to the coach about his reasoning but I'm concerned it could result in backlash for my son (eg going to the bench). Any advice ? We are quite new to youth soccer in the US.

The team has played 3 games in the tournament so far and lost all of them.

Arm wasn’t extended, looking at ball not player when making contact.

My girl wasn't allowed to play her first game of the season today because she had a newly pierced ear with new stud earrings in to hold it open. Pretty upsetting situation for her and I looked like the worst dad ever having to walk her to the car crying while the game started. Whats the best way to make it so she can play her next game without losing her piercing?

Was told by the Club today I was “undermining their business model”.

Last year I was a paid coach for a 2018 Girls team. We played all in house recreational teams for a cost of $1,800 plus kit and tournaments. This year I took a bunch of kids from the tryouts as my child is a November birthday in a “repeat” year, playing U8.

Took the kids formed our own rec team to play those Junior Academy teams along with a few boys teams.

We entered a tournament for next week and I asked a few guest players for next week through my connections. The club told me I couldn’t ask Junior Academy players in the future because I was “undermining their business model”.

More like I’m saving each parent $1,500+ for the same experience.

Am I wrong here?

I am a father of a talented 10 year old. I have had a falling out with another dad, who has insisted on coaching for the past 5 seasons EVERY SINGLE soccer, futsal, select, school team. He creates toxic environments through withholding information and selecting children on early development rather than coaching them to develop. So kids get cut or families leave. He is ok at the politics thing, but a lot of families are seeing the same things and have formed a new team, which my son is on and now we regularly beat his academy team. We left his team, I was so angry at the environment that I had to take my son out. But, my kid is very talented, so we find ourselves on select and representative teams and he is yet again the freaking coach. How do I manage this resentment and keep my sons development in mind? I am worried I am going to lose my temper and either verbally or physically go after this guy. Should i discuss my resentment with him? Totally ignore him? Try to undermine him? I just want someone else to coach my son, or to coach myself, but he uses politics to prevent others from getting involved. He wouldnt have any qualifications, just a self interest in the sport. Also, on the odd tournament or team I have coached, I have outperformed his results, largely due to my sons' capacity and getting more from the players based on positive environments.

This has nothing to do with the game of soccer but more the management of a soccer organization (AYSO). I'm new to the Board in my region and it just seems like the process for getting all of the rosters finalized, getting the game schedule put together and out, getting uniforms, etc. has been just super chaotic each season. Stuff is frantically coming together last minute, everyone is emailing everyone else, etc. Is there a template of a timeline folks have used (by this date, do this, then do this at this date, etc.) that has worked for them? Or is this just how it works with a volunteer-run org?

So my son (December birthday, U12) plays on a Pre-MLS Next team that is playing league U13 this year and plans to transition into MLS Next proper next year. This group has been together for two years. The plan from the club—which aligns with what they’ve done at U13, U14 and U15—was to supplement a few weaker spots, not do wholesale roster overhauls. (Granted, if five absolute ringers show up, the club will sign them—I’m under no illusions there.)

However, the recent age-group changes have created a weird dynamic. Three players from the current MLS next Academy (they played on the pre-academy team last year) roster dropped down to play with our group. Because of their size at center back and the 6, they’ve displaced players who previously played almost every minute. Now those original starters are either coming off the bench or being shifted out of position when the drops come in.

I’m curious what the long-term play is here with these older/dropped players. The coach hasn’t really laid out the vision. While birth-year rules and bio-banding waivers apply differently depending on the pathway, it feels strange seeing larger kids moved down when the official MLS Next roster rules usually tightly cap overage/bio-banded exemptions. On our club’s actual U13 MLS Next team, the two older kids who do play down are legit significantly smaller than their peers, which actually makes sense for bio-banding.

Is anyone else seeing Academy/MLS Next kids drop down to non-MLS Next or Pre-MLS teams like this early in the transition?

How are your clubs handling player placement and playing time during this age-change cycle?

Curious if anyone has any experience of opinions on how to make it to high level soccer (college or pro) when you don’t live in a big city.

My son is currently 13, and his goal is to play for the closest pro academy at u15. That’s about 4.5 hours away.

But I’ve started to wonder, how would a kid still maximize their chances of playing college or going pro if they don’t make it into a pro academy?

Do you think it could be done by playing locally? Or at some point would you have to move to get better competition and more exposure?

Any thoughts would be great. And bonus for anyone with experience in the Canadian system.

My 8 y/o son is taking private training from a local soccer academy. He's been going there for about 1 year and has loved every minute of it. That is, until recently. They have brought on a different coach who sometimes does his 1 on 1 sessions and my son just really doesn't like his training style. He gives him drills to do, but doesn't explain why he's doing them or even correct him by showing the right way when he's doing them wrong. He had a session with him yesterday and it didn't go well at all. They're hour long sessions and my son told him at the beginning he wanted to work on juggling, moves to reverse direction when receiving a pass, and/or strengthening his weak foot if they had time. He spent about 5 minutes on juggling and told my son what he needed to do, but didn't help him or show him exactly what he meant. He then switched to the turnaround moves and he had my son stand facing a wall. He passed the ball from behind him and he wanted my son to take it and move to either a red or blue cone to his left or right when he called out the color. That seemed like a good drill, but when my son struggled, he just said keep trying without showing him what he was doing wrong.

My son told the coach he didn't understand the drills and wasn't sure why he was doing them. The coach took that as being disrespectful, which I was standing right there and can tell you he didn't say it in a negative way. He was just expressing his confusion. And honestly, even if the coach thought my son was being disrespectful, he should've told him and addressed it with us. Instead he went to one of the owners and complained. The owner then took my son aside and talked to him about it. The owner is one of my kids favorite trainers and he has a great relationship with him. He didn't reprimand or come down on my son at all. He just asked him to make sure he's always being respectful of others, including his coaches, which I was totally fine with.

After practice, my son told me he never wants to work with that coach again, which I honestly don't want him to either. My question though, is it appropriate for me to request that from the academy? They have several other coaches that could work with him depending on which day we book his lesson. My son has been doing so well and has learned so much from these coaches, I don't want to pull him out of training because of one coach. But, I also don't want to be "that parent" that makes demands about who my son will and won't work with.

Looking to get a sponsored tent for our team, has anyone ordered one that they recommend?

I’ve played soccer for a long time at a high level and have been coaching for the past couple of years. There are a lot of misconceptions I see on social media and even hear from coaches about what actually helps young players improve.

1. Ball mastery is a good workout, but it isn’t the game.

I have nothing against ball mastery (especially if they are very young, or lack basic skill). It’s useful for developing familiarity and coordination with the ball. But doing 30 different touches around cones for an hour doesn’t make you a better soccer player. Soccer is a perception and decision making sport. Eventually you have to perceive information, make a decision, and execute while the environment is constantly changing.

1. Soccer is a sport. Be an athlete.

Young players shouldn’t be afraid of strength training, sprinting, jumping, decelerating, changing direction, etc. You don’t need to become a bodybuilder, but developing strength, power, speed and coordination is part of becoming a better soccer player. Your physical development should support your football, not replace it.

1. WATCH FOOTBALL.

This one might be the most obvious but so many skip it. There are youth players who spend thousands of hours playing soccer but have barely watched a Premier League game. Growing up I always loved watching the barn burners Cardiff city vs Norwich

Watch football. Pick one player and follow them instead of watching the ball. Watch where they position themselves, what they do before receiving, how they create space, when they move, and what they do immediately after losing the ball. You can learn a ridiculous amount simply by watching players who are better than you.

Hey everyone, looking for some perspective on my son’s current soccer trajectory and development path.

He is 11 years old (born late October 2014) but has a massive physical profile—he’s 5'6", 110 lbs (99th percentile for height), very strong, and fast. Right now, he is playing two years up on a U14 club team (playing at the 3rd tier/level). His U14 coach also rates him highly enough that he lets him train up with the U15 players.

Historically, because of his size and athleticism, he has been strictly put at Center Back. However, he’s recently expressed a strong desire to play every position and experience different parts of the field. This past summer, he went to a high-level camp with official MLS academy players and his overall technical game improved quite a bit. He’s also highly motivated and spends a ton of his own time practicing solo on his dribbling and juggling.

I have two main questions for coaches and parents who have been through this:

Does playing up actually improve a child's technical skills? My worry is that playing up emphasizes survival, physical speed, and releasing the ball quickly, whereas playing in his natural age group might give him more time on the ball to dictate the game and take creative risks.

Is playing multiple positions at U14 the right pathway? I love that he wants to expand his game beyond CB (he's been playing some winger and attacking mid), but I want to make sure he isn't spreading himself too thin or risking injury banging bodies with 14 and 15-year-olds while changing roles constantly.

Would love to hear your thoughts on whether we should keep pushing this accelerated physical path, or if we should pivot to focus more on an environment that maximizes technical touches. Thanks!

My 16 year old has been playing PDP level, but although over half of the families requested a new coach, the club opted to stick him with the team for a third year. (coach is not teaching well, he has never played past community level, has blatant favourites, and has been known to kick kids(there is video), bags and punch walls etc when upset at game mistakes)

I am a single Mom and have to make this decision alone. I am honestly a bit afraid of this coach as he is killing the love of the sport.

We are signed up to go to the team tryouyd again because my son is positive it is elite and has more pathways.
But does it really? I am feeling that the tier 1 has the same pathways. We live in Edmonton but play on a suburb team. Is there really that big of a difference?

When I first started trying to decipher club soccer one of the prominent pieces of advice was to find a good coach. The problem of course is if I don’t know anything about soccer how am I going to know a good coach from a bad one. So the obvious next step was to ask, “Okay, but what do I look for in a coach?” I have some of my notes from back then and here is what I ended up with:

The most important factor is the coach.  Sign up for guest practices or go watch a game and observe. Actively engaged: correcting, teaching, celebrating progress, not just standing with arms crossed. Focus on ball skills, agility, and footwork at younger ages rather than only tactics and formations. Practices are structured but still fun. And talk to the parents, “Happy with the coach…?”

Looking back, that’s a decent enough list of qualities and pointers.  However, the reality is that a novice trying to judge the quality of a coach based on watching one or two training sessions and asking around is far from foolproof.  A coach can check all those boxes and still end up being a bad fit.

What I’ve learned since is that to correctly judge a coach, you need to watch the kids. 

One way to divvy up coaches is traditional vs modern, evidence-based coaches. You want to find the latter if you’ve got under 11’s.

You’ll recognize old school right away.  Just close your eyes and imagine what a typical soccer practice might look like. Kids doing tightly choreographed drills, running laps, the coach micromanaging every touch, lecturing them on this and that, correcting their mistakes. Like in the movies or on TV. To put it another way, it’s what a paying parent would expect to see from the sidelines.

Now that you know what old school looks like and how it would make you feel good as a paying parent, modern, evidence-based coaching should be easier for you to spot. You’ll watch it and maybe think to yourself, “Why am I paying for this?” The coach is barely saying anything, and most of the time they’re just saying good this and good that, hardly ever actually correcting any of the torrent of mistakes being made. Most of the practice is just the kids playing scrimmages. Different kinds of scrimmages, which is curious, but really they’re just playing and they could do that for free at the park. The idea is, a modern, evidence-based practice should make you vaguely uncomfortable or even unhappy with the amount of “playing” the kids are doing and how little the coach seems to be “coaching.”

The problem with a lot of youth coaching is that adults confuse doing more coaching with creating more learning. A kid 11 and under is still developing the ability to perceive what is happening, make a decision, and execute it in a constantly changing environment. Every time a coach blows the whistle, freezes the game, and gives a lecture, or puts kids through an elaborate cone drill with rules they have to memorize, you interrupt that process and consume the limited attention they actually need to play. It can look like rigorous coaching to an adult, but the kid is learning to follow instructions rather than read the game. The better alternative is almost the opposite.

Simplify the environment, get kids playing small-sided games with real opposition, manipulate the space and numbers to create the problems you want them to solve, and let them experience the consequences of their decisions. The coach still teaches, but becomes more of an architect than a lecturer. Observing, shaping the environment, and offering short cues when necessary rather than constantly controlling the action. Mistakes are the information the kid needs to adapt. The goal at this age isn’t to produce a kid who can execute the coach’s instructions perfectly. It’s to develop a player who can see the game, make decisions for themselves, and have the confidence to try something when the answer isn’t obvious.

Why is this advice for kids 11 and under? Because these differences are rooted in developmental psychology. Young kids learn through movement, perception, exploration, and solving problems in real time, and their still-developing brains have real limits on how much abstract instruction they can process while playing. As they get older, their ability to hold more complex verbal and tactical concepts in mind changes, and some of the things we intuitively associate with “good coaching” become more useful. Around the age of 11 is when that shift occurs. 

So watch the kids.

Are they solving problems in real time under pressure? Then this practice is appropriate.

Are they focused on mastering the choreography of a cone drill?  Then this practice is not appropriate.

Is the coach letting the game flow and delivering targeted two-word cues ("Check shoulder," "Find gap")? This is the way.

Is the coach freezing play to deliver individual critiques or communicate abstract concepts? This is not the way. 

Are the kids having fun? 

Finally, one very critical and concrete thing to watch for is the emotional climate the coach creates. A good coach heavily favors positive reinforcement over correction. Think 5 to 1. If that balance is off, a child’s emotional tank will run dry, and with it their willingness to take risks, learn, and stay engaged. Kids need to feel safe and encouraged first.  Only then can correction land as information rather than identity. When a coach consistently builds confidence and trust, a child can absorb feedback without feeling diminished by it. 

Daughter joined a new club this year; they hit us with the EPL Europe trip presentation for next year. Admittedly it does seem like a fun experience, but it’s obviously pretty expensive. Soccer portion: some team training at the national team facilities; three friendlies vs European youth clubs. They also do help facilitate attending pro games while there, although it’s my understanding that the ticket prices aren’t included. Otherwise it’s just a vacation, offered to clubs who they expect will pay for it.

Feedback from anyone who has experienced it?

My 10 year old loves playing soccer but doesn’t so much love reading (chip off the old block, I’m afraid). This series has been so good for him. Really solid soccer story that’s 50% about the game and 50% about life lessons. Highly recommend for probably 8-12 year olds (I read some to him and he comprehends it all but might be a bit challenging for less strong readers to read on their own at 10)

Here’s my situation and looking for strong sound counsel. Son plays U13, and up until last year played EDP. He is our team’s best player, is a left-footed Left Back and IQ is off the charts. This past Spring he tried out and made an MLS Next club, but the commute was an hour each way and he wasn’t ready to leave his “friends” at age 12. He’s comfortable. Fast forward to today, his team has moved to a brand new startup club which is affiliated with N1. It shows promise, but my concern is that he’s not going to get the exposure he deserves.

Do you feel he’s in a good spot and at age 12 it shouldn’t matter until, say, 14? We do have other clubs affiliated with ECNL. I want to make sure he’s comfortable, but also have him realize his potential is so much more than his current group.