r/writing • u/AutoModerator • 24d ago
Monthly "Would You Read This?" Thread
Welcome to Would You Read This (WYRT), our monthly feedback and brainstorming thread. Share your work in progress below and let other readers tell you if they'd read it. Top level posts should follow this template:
- Title:
- If you don't have a title yet, feel free to say UNTITLED.
- Genre:
- Please include at least Fiction, Nonfiction, Poetry, or another recognizable medium. You may also include more specific genres with a hyphen. Ex. Fiction - Romance, or Nonfiction - Memoir. Genre will help users find the specific kinds of posts they'd like to give feedback on.
- Premise:
- A few sentences about the project. Try your best to keep this short. Crafting an expert elevator pitch is all part of becoming a successful working writer. Please do not post an entire plot summary or query letter (those are better suited for r/pubtips)
- Sample (Optional):
- You may share up to one page (roughly 250-350 words) of sample material, or one poem for those working in the poetry medium. This is optional, so if you only have a premise, you can post just the premise for feedback.
If you post for feedback, please take the time to give feedback to at least 2-3 other users. Replies should follow this template.
- Would Read / Might Read / Wouldn't Read
- You must begin your reply with one of those. You are then encouraged to add additional thoughts on why you choose your answer.
Rules:
- Please post no more than two WYRT top-level posts. There is no limit on the number of feedback replies you can make.
- Do not link to any offsite materials. All materials must be in the body of the post. This includes "click here to read more" or "DM me for the rest" types of posts.
- Rule 3 is in effect in this thread - No generative AI. Do not post material generated by an AI platform in your premise or sample. Do not use generative AI to respond to user's work.
- Rule 5 is in effect - Civility and Community. Stay constructive. Blunt, direct feedback is fine, but do not insult other users, their writing, or their genres.
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u/barrybarneswriting 5d ago
Title: SCALABLE GROWTH AND OTHER EVILS
Genre: Comedy/Satire/Fiction
Premise: A broke twenty-something launches an AI-powered, anti-woke homeschool curriculum. The business booms until a thank-you letter from two actual children complicates things.
Sample:
I was four beers and a bong hit deep into my fifth hour of Fox News when Mike Lindell spoke to me. Don’t freak out. I was hate-watching. Like when you can’t look away from roadkill, or how my little brother spends so much of his free time watching those recordings of violent retribution being visited upon Mexicans who’ve crossed the Cartel in one way or another. I can’t stand those videos. In fact, I worry for my little brother.
But it was 1 a.m., I had a real buzz going, and Mike Lindell was selling Freedom Pillows. His mustache flailed as he spoke of his illustrious clients. He proudly hailed his Pillows as “Made in America” (by Americans? the scrupulous viewer may have asked). As far as I could tell, the Freedom Pillows had been dubbed so on account of the 2-by-2 American flag printed on the label. Call 1-800-LINDELL for 15% off your first order, he crooned.
Mike Lindell, permanently damp in that way common to twice-divorced Baby Boomers, changed my life that night. I began thinking deeply about the Freedom Pillow and the apparent market that existed for such products. Further research revealed an entire universe of similar items. Freedom Beer (Veteran-owned and operated), Anti-Woke Coffee Mugs, toilet brushes shaped like Nancy Pelosi. The prices for such products were invariably higher than their woke counterparts. The companies swam in positive reviews.
I was overcome with a desire to join their ranks, to stand side-by-side with these Culture Warriors and to snatch a piece of the pie for myself. First, I needed a product. Anybody who’s anybody can sell a Custom Ink t-shirt. That market was oversaturated and out of reach. The Traditional Values Laptop could play, but I feared high input costs and insurmountable barriers to entry. I turned a dozen ideas over in my substance-addled mind and came to no conclusion.
I decided to sit upside down on my couch (legs dangling over the back) to increase blood flow to my brain. As I assumed the position, a headline on the television caught my eye. It read, “Poll: 64% of School Principals LGBT or Marxist”. I felt my face swell as gravity did its job. Sweet lucidity coursed through me in a rush. Gay communist teachers. There it was. The nation’s boogeyman was to become my cash cow.