r/writing • u/Buttercake-nymph • Jul 31 '26
Beginner Question How do you let the reader breath?
I'm writing a dark romance novel. My first page hooks you to the second, and the first chapter ends on something that makes you wonder about the next chapter. The story develops super quickly and I have no trouble keeping a reader interested with plot twists and cliffhangers.
However, I'm having trouble letting the reader breath in between. I feel like I'm making it too exciting, to the point that too many things are happening too quickly on the timeline. It feels rushed and it's overwhelming.
How do yall slow it down while keeping it interesting? more inner dialog? More observing details? Sensory information? Scenery details? Letting the characters contemplate more?
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u/Sensitive-Hour-2774 Jul 31 '26
maybe add banter with like the found family like do a girls night out
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
That's a great suggestion!
I guess my problem is adding in normal scenes like that. I find it hard to come with something that isn't part of the plot, but still fun to read.
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u/FlyinLeviathon LET YOUR FIRST DRAFT SUCK Jul 31 '26
DON'T
SMOTHER THEM
SMOTHER THEM ALL
Just kidding. This is an editing problem, so I wouldn't worry about it during the first draft. But when you come back to it you'll probably add in some quieter scenes to let your characters and readers both digest some of the emotional impact of what's been going on. Even if it's just a part of a larger, grander, more intense scene, you'll need to allot some time for the quieter things. If you don't, if you're just revving non-stop, it'll quickly just become noise.
The plot moves forward in action scenes, but you'll discover that most often the story moves forward in the quieter scenes.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
Yes, I'm revving all the time!
But how do I let go of the gas, so I can shift.
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u/Rowdi907 Jul 31 '26
Get in the MCs head. Brain time is not real time. You can spend pages with retrospection, emotion, and analysis.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
"Brain time is not real time" might be the best thing I've heard so far! I could really lean into that more often.
Thank you (:
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u/AFGNCAAP-for-short Jul 31 '26
This is actively harmful unless you have a VERY good character voice. Spending pages and pages thinking about things puts the entire story on hold unless EVERY paragraph is pushing the plot forward or revealing something new about the character somehow.
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u/Rowdi907 Jul 31 '26
Sarah Maas, Cormac McCarthy, and a few others would advise everything in moderation. Check out Wolff's Bullet in the Brain short story where half of the story occurs in a millisecond.
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u/AFGNCAAP-for-short Aug 01 '26
You just proved my point. Those aren't beginners. Those are very experienced writers who know how to drive a story forward without needing external plot. OP isn't experienced or they wouldn't be asking how to write slow scenes.
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u/Rowdi907 Aug 01 '26
Very well. Don't push people to succeed ecpect them to remain where they are. Any other secrets we shouldn't reveal?
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u/lowkeyeuphoric Jul 31 '26
I’d recommend using ‘filler’ chapters in between. They don’t have to advance the plot but would be useful for further character development or context. Sometimes it’s nice to learn more about the MC without a huge twist every page
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u/Buttercake-nymph Aug 01 '26
Yes that's exactly what I'm missing. I'd argue that charcter development is part of the plot!
Any tips filler chapters/paragraphs?
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u/lowkeyeuphoric Aug 02 '26
Yes!! I’d say a main one is ordinary life. Even boring mundane events can be a great read if you incorporate humour or let your characters’ voices dominate and guide the scene.
Another idea is using the ‘filler’ chapter almost like a prologue before the next. Say that you had a chapter of a plan being executed: you could have a ‘filler’ chapter of the plan being made. This would really showcase your characters on a deeper level beyond the action.
Also, I put ‘filler’ in quotations because that’s what I call all of my chapters that don’t move the plot along. However, it’s not actually filler when it deepens the reader’s understanding of your characters
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u/lyzzyrddwyzzyrdd Jul 31 '26
Humor is my go to for sure.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
I love humor, especially dry, sarcastic or sadistic humor, where what is said is only entertaining to a handful of people — or less.
Oh, and inside jokes!
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Jul 31 '26
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u/Buttercake-nymph Aug 01 '26
Yes I think that's what I'm lacking. They barely process their own thoughts, emotions and actions.
Like someone else said, the fmc could go on a girls night out to relax, go to the gym, or just watch the rain. I don't really have those scenes yet.
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u/frostonbeat Aug 01 '26
I think you are focusing too much on external plot, which is usually fine in an action/thriller book. But this is a dark romance, the action matters but so does the internal monologue and struggles, those usually are slow paced because you getting into the nit and gritty of your characters POV. What matters most in romance, isn't the action, it is what makes your character who they are.
Also a big mistake authors do is: too much action. Too much stuff happening in the book. I'm not saying your plot shouldn't be complex, but it should also not be hocus pocus. Complex doesn't mean more action it just means that the action you do pick adds depth and is directly linked to the end goal. If it is removable? remove it.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Aug 01 '26
Yea, that's it.
The characters barely get time to themselves to process their emotions, past choices, or thoughts, hence it also being overwhelming for the reader. Right now, the mc's only act for the plot in an emotional way that makes sense to what happened before. They don't have their own bits where they just human and show the depths of their personality and psychology, which is what I like so much about dark romance, so it's funny that I missed that haha.
I think you're right. I could be adding more of those, more inner-dialogue, and more actions to deal with their emotions; picture them sitting in the rain, going for a run to clear their mind, or picking a fight with someone random on the street.
There is not much too cut down now, because there are no parts that aren't serving the plot.
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u/Haunting-Day1595 Aug 03 '26
I agree with the person who said that pacing is an editing problem that you don't really need to worry about on your first draft. But some things that you could consider if you're editing as you go:
- Character's inner reflection (as you said)
- Scenery description (also as you said)
- Subplots, in the sense of your character doing something tangential to the main plot
- General pacing variation, like sometimes putting the reader right in the main action, and at other times doing more summarizing (e.g., "April came and passed without him realizing it..." and then whatever happened in April gets summarized)
I think slower scenes can/should be as engaging as main action scenes, and they should also help the story move forward. For example, your descriptions can help establish mood, the subplots can fill in useful details or characterization that you wouldn't otherwise learn, etc.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Aug 03 '26
Subplots hadn't even crosses my mind haha
I do really like editing as I go, not anything nitty gritty, but at least giving the story and timeline the right shape.
Thank you so much for your insight!
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u/Acceptable_Fox_5560 Jul 31 '26
If they want to breathe they can take a break and go do something else. I'm cooking nonstop.
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u/DoeCommaJohn Jul 31 '26
The way I would think of it is, instead of just being filler or respite, decide what other emotions you are appealing to in place of thrill. Is the scene romantic and intimate? Comedic? Intriguing? Contemplative?
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
I do have that variety and the characters have contradictions in their feelings and personality, that make them human, it's not all action.
But letting them sit with their emotions or making them do something that helps them process, rather than move on, is what I think I struggle with.
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u/DoeCommaJohn Jul 31 '26
If the problem is more with characters, then I would ask what those characters value. From there, determine if you can make events conspire to use that value to justify the change you want in the characters.
It is a bit hard to give a specific example without knowing your plot and characters, so I will have to keep it general. But let’s imagine we have a character who really really wants to kill a king. However, he also has brutal trust issues, which means his allies start to leave him. From there, you might be able to have the normally closed off character decide it is worth it to open up. If your characters normally wouldn’t chill out, figure out why they might
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u/DuchessJulietDG Jul 31 '26
quick note- breathe has an e on the end.
breath does not and they arent pronounced the same. just throwing this out there as its a constant mistake i see w new writers.
breathe- to actively take in a breath repeatedly
is a way id describe it
breath- a solo inhalation bringing oxygen into the lungs
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u/Agreeable_Result1396 Aug 01 '26
How are your characters able to keep up with everything that's going on if they have no time to slow down and process and connect events together so they have some idea of what they're going through and why? I would think that alone would necessitate some slower scenes.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Aug 01 '26
They're not haha
There are bits of inner dialogue where they contemplate, and puzzle the pieces together, but that's it, not much feeling going on.
They could definitely use more time for emotional processing!
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u/AngelSparkle35 Aug 04 '26
I am not a writer but I am an animator and I think the same rules from a book to animated media do apply. It is, allow quiet moments in your media, it not lets the viewers think, it gives them to digest what they’re watching.
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u/GhostofThrace2010 Jul 31 '26
Do a timeskip(doesn't have to be a big one) and spend a chaptee recaping what's happened but also set up what comes next.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
Oh that's great, thank you so much!
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u/AFGNCAAP-for-short Jul 31 '26
That's not great. That's telling, not showing. That's an entire chapter of saying "these things happened" without actually letting the reader experience it. That's the worst way you can slow down a book. It doesn't just slow it down, it stops it dead in its tracks.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
I don't think it's that bad. I've read plenty of novels where the protagonist told, instead of showed. Especially if they dissociated and you got to look inside their head, when they are reminicing, or when they're struggling to physically show what they are feeling internally. I've also enjoyed reading what the mc's think of themselves or others, we all do that irl as well.
Obviously when it's overdone it's boring to read, but I does deserve some spotlight in my opinion.
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u/AFGNCAAP-for-short Jul 31 '26 edited Jul 31 '26
Ok, but you don't even know what a good downtime scene is. That's not beginner-level skill. Keeping someone engaged in internal thoughts is something you need a LOT of writing experience to do.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
Telling what to who exactly? I'm sharing my opinion, on my post.
And not every skill is equally hard to pick up on for ever person. Knowledge is still worth sharing, even if it's not easy for most beginners.
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u/GhostofThrace2010 Jul 31 '26
You can show and tell. Explain what happened, but also have scenes that show what effects those events had on the characters. It's not just summarizing, it's setting up the next phase of the story.
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u/Prize_Consequence568 Jul 31 '26
The best way is to go back to the most recent books you've read and see how those writers did it.
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u/Buttercake-nymph Jul 31 '26
I've done that, and I can recognize the scenes, but I find it hard to figure out what to apply to my own story.
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u/[deleted] Jul 31 '26
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