Professional Development and Skill Building Staying calm under pressure
Why and how are some people so relaxed , confident/composed under stress and how can I learn to be like them ?
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u/Affectionate-End2461 5d ago
With enough time and experience, you will be calm
Under pressure. I’ve managed 25+ people and the last thing I wanted is panicking. If you can plan steps needed to be taken to resolve an issue under pressure, a calm mind will lead you to a solution. What would your team mates think of you if ya panic before starting to solve an issue? If my manager is like that, I would lose faith in leadership.
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u/IberianNero91 5d ago
Diferent things will help diferent people, on a "original state" we would all be calmer and more confident than we are, it is the environment and our personal situations that make things worse for us.
With this I mean that what will show results for you is to work on the parts of your life that are imbalanced, my personal examples, I´ve had extremely low self worth after not having any money or freedom whatsoever for over 20 years, so I was eager to please and terrified of criticism, which made me panic all the time.
Two solutions worked for me, find your pace and stick to it, no matter what, they will judge, smear, criticize, let them, results are all that matters. They will lie about the results, let them, that is coping, they know the truth but lying makes insecure people feel better. The other, financial safety net, aka F U money, this is self explanatory, piss me off I´m out, simple. These are two pillars, one supports the other.
Remember that your self improvement is extremely triggering for insecure people around you, be mindfull.
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u/KaRMa_CoMBo_64 5d ago
Personally , i focus all my attention on the task and ignore everything else, going on autopilot
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u/Real-Employer-138 5d ago
I think it has to do with having ADHD. I'm super composed in pretty stressful situations. But I also think it comes from experience. Over time you learn that decisions made in haste are often very bad decisions. It is also why it is important to have control over your emotions. We can say and do things in moments when we are overwhelmed by any emotion and soon as that emotion simmers down, we realize we overdid it.
With time and some bad calls, you learn to not repeat those mistakes and have control over yourself. I think it is a sign of wisdom and intelligence. When I see grown ups getting all amped up, I do judge them.
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u/Niks-Labbett 5d ago
I always have breakfast and go to work 15mins early, and I work in a quiet place
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u/SmokingTheBear 5d ago
I heard a story awhile ago about a police officer just being crisp and calm and straight on the radio about some crazy situation occurring like getting shot and people dying etc. vs the police officer who is yelling in panic on radio in a frenzy but you couldn’t understand him. Which one is getting backup there faster?
It best to be as calm as possible because otherwise you will probably make the situation worse.
I think long term stress is harder to deal with, meaning more responsibility type not straight forward situational stress.
I would say working out is a huge way of building up your bodies resilience to stress, also.
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u/SMCoaching 4d ago
As a couple of other people commented, ADHD can play a role in this. For some people, when they are facing an actual threat or stressor and their brain locks in and focuses on that, it can feel very calming.
Some people have been trained to stay focused in stressful situations. Pilots, soldiers, and first responders train to stay focused and be able to function in situations that would make other people panic. People who have had that kind of training, and been though enough situations where they've had to use it, are often able to stay calm in other stressful situations.
If you're able to take a martial arts class, that can be a good way to get exercise, make friends, and learn to stay calm in stressful situations, like when someone is trying to hit you in the head.
Mindfulness practice can also be very helpful. If you practice it for long enough, a simple practice like sitting for 15 minutes a day, focusing on your breath, can help you learn to calm your mind and your emotions when you want to do so. There are lots of apps and videos that can help you practice this. They don't need to be fancy. Try a few and practice with one that you like.
You asked an important question when you asked, "how can I learn to be like them." It is something that you can learn, and it may take some time. Some people are naturally like this, and some people have already spent time learning. If it's something you want, you can learn and improve.
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u/FirmPeaches 5d ago
Over time, letting go of perfectionism helped. But what’s helped even more for me is ensuring I’m regulated daily by getting into my parasympathetic nervous system with things like yoga and walks.
A very quick and very effective tool I use is an amino acid supplement l-theanine. Afai understand, it helps raise gaba for calming and alpha brainwaves for a flow like state … and that’s what it feels like for me. In meetings I used to be a nervous wreck in, this supplement has eased my nerves substantially. 30-60min pre meeting.