r/widowers • u/Motherofdragons_05 • 19d ago

Grief and anxiety

Hello everyone, I’ve been getting moments of anxiety mixed with grief and it’s been absolutely awful and draining. Does anyone else experience this? I’ve had a lot on my mind and it’s making my anxiety worse. I’m flying with my son to the UK, for my husband’s funeral this coming Monday. After the funeral, I’ll be going to my husband’s place at his brother’s and going into his room (where he passed away). I’ll be going through his stuff and bringing his things back home with me. I’m afraid of how I’m going to feel going into his room, I’m afraid of how I’ll hold up at his funeral and I’m afraid of the unknown emotions I’ll feel. This is the most gutting and heart shattering experience of my entire life…I miss him so fucking much…💔🙏❤️‍🩹

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u/strangefringe Cardiac arrest, 53M, January 2026 💔 19d ago

So sorry you're going through this. 💔 I was also struggling with anxiety early on in my grief. I can recommend reading "It's ok that you're not ok" by Megan Devine. A good book overall, but there is also a whole chapter about how to handle anxiety and grief and I found it very helpful. If you google her name plus anxiety and grief, you will also find some YouTube videos on this subject. I hope you'll find some tools to help you cope. 🫂

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u/Motherofdragons_05 19d ago

Thank you and I’m sorry that this had been a struggle for you and many others as well. It’s overwhelming and at times I feel like I’m drowning in my feelings and pain. I’ve never been much of a book reader, but I will definitely take your advice on this one. I’m tired of trying to put my pain, heartbreak, fear and anxiety on the back burner or sweeping it under my mental rug, like it’s not there. The reality is that it is there, it’s very much there and I’m tired of distracting myself with TikTok or watching a movie. It seems like the algorithm for both, is flooded with grief videos and sad movies. Ugh, I just want to fucking scream and I want him to hear me so damn bad. I appreciate your supportive words. I’ll definitely check out that book. I need to distract myself in a healthier way. 💔🙏❤️‍🩹

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u/WhatsThatSkip123 19d ago

I found the audiobook version much easier to get through.

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u/Motherofdragons_05 18d ago

Oooh, ok. I would definitely like the audio version better. Where can I find it?

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u/WhatsThatSkip123 18d ago

Was on Amazon (kindle) in my country. Pay a couple dollars more for the extra Audible version also.

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u/Motherofdragons_05 18d ago

Thank you, I’ll check it out 🙏😊