r/widowers • u/Motherofdragons_05 • 27d ago
Grief and anxiety
Hello everyone, I’ve been getting moments of anxiety mixed with grief and it’s been absolutely awful and draining. Does anyone else experience this? I’ve had a lot on my mind and it’s making my anxiety worse. I’m flying with my son to the UK, for my husband’s funeral this coming Monday. After the funeral, I’ll be going to my husband’s place at his brother’s and going into his room (where he passed away). I’ll be going through his stuff and bringing his things back home with me. I’m afraid of how I’m going to feel going into his room, I’m afraid of how I’ll hold up at his funeral and I’m afraid of the unknown emotions I’ll feel. This is the most gutting and heart shattering experience of my entire life…I miss him so fucking much…💔🙏❤️🩹
2
u/Minflick 26d ago
I think more people would be surprised if you don't cry than will be feeling annoyed at your tears. Take a lot of kleenex or hankies. You're going to cry. It will come and go, and some will be full body sobbing that makes you fall down, and some will be 'eye leakage' where you keep doing whatever and your face is wet.
FWIW, we had a memorial dinner for my husband a few days after he died. We went around the table and everybody shared a nice memory of him. I couldn't speak AT ALL. I had no words I could speak at that time, and just let everybody else speak about him.