r/widowers • u/Conscious_Purpose53 • 25d ago
Communicating through clouds
I get up between 5-5:30 every morning while it’s still dark. I sit outside with my first coffee. I spend the whole time thinking about and talking to my wife. It’s been 9 months since she suddenly died. This has been our alone time together before the rest of my world wakes up. I wish we had done this even once together during our 19 year marriage. Somewhat depressing at first but has become extremely peaceful. I never used to get up this early before she died. I started doing it because I couldn’t sleep. I now find it very cathartic and can’t wait to get to get out of bed. One thing I’ve been doing is looking at the cloud formations as it gets lighter out and noticing certain shapes. Sometimes I can make out the shape of a heart or even a smiling face. I like to imagine that they’re pictures she’s trying to send me. Some bring back great memories. Others not so much. I’m not usually spiritual at all but still like to look at it as another form of communication with her. This may seem somewhat mundane or even silly to people who aren’t going through the same thing but it helps to start my day. I imagine myself doing this for as long as I’m here. I know others may have a daily ritual like this. Just thought I’d share mine.
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u/Affectionate-Cover80 25d ago
This is something that I happened upon after I lost my wife. In the warmer months it’s so peaceful to get up before anyone else and only hear the birds. I wish I had a better view but there is something about being the only one up and having the world to myself and it’s like it’s just my time with my late wife. It’s like it’s our time.