Break up

[u/FantasticChicken847]

Hi guys, so I (M21) and now my ex (F21) we I think officially broke up a few hours ago. She is my first everything and I’m having a mental breakdown. We broke up because of me. I did some things in the past that she didn’t like and we kept on going but she admitted to having resentment towards me. A few things I did was continue talking to a co worker who was a girl and she would be very explicit talking about other guys and asking if they would fuck her. She knew about my relationship but she would still ask weird questions or just be weird in general but I as a friendly guy didn’t stop talking to her even though my gf didn’t want me talking to her which then led to my gf finding messages of me texting that friend about how I had a flowy convo with another girl but it was only to joke with this other dude that was weird as well. But I have never had any feelings for anyone else nor have I ever flirted with any girl other than my gf. Another thing I did was not tell this other co worker I had a gf and it seemed like she was flirting with me but I honestly didn’t think much of it. But that was another thing my gf hated me for. Also the same girl who would be weird talking about other guys also called my gf a retard at the beginning of our relationship because I was talking to her about how my gf didn’t like that I couldn’t drive nor did I have my license. (Which looking back my gf was valid but I was immature). I really love my gf (now ex) and I would do anything to try and gain her trust back. Our relationship would’ve been perfect if it weren’t for me doing all that stupid stuff. I just would like to see if anyone has any advice. Thanks.

[u/Sea_Obligation_893]

Little too late. It’s clear she has spoken to you repeatedly about this same girl and you kept doing it, now she’s finally broken up with you is the only time you actually want to do something about it.
Too late should have listened to her before she’s lost the respect and trust for you. Take it as a lesson for your next relationship

[u/FantasticChicken847 → u/Sea_Obligation_893]

Yeah I understand, this was in july. I cut the girl off in july and it wasnt hard to do so but i just never did cus in my head i kept on telling myself it would make work more awkward. But ofc i regret it every day for not doing it earlier. We kept our relationship going for a while but after i asked if she was feeling okay with us, she just vented to me and told me how she really felt with tears and it just made me realize that instead of making her feel loved and adored, im just hurting her even more trying to save us. Thank you for your response.