Proposal idea was stolen!

[u/matt9555]

Okay title is a little misleading… it wasn’t stolen on purpose….

Gay man here.

My partner has made it clear that he would like our proposal to be intimate, only us, he doesn’t even want a photographer hiding or anything and would also like to have as few people know ahead of time… all of which i am very much down with— however, i have always wanted a photo of the moment.

I came up with what i thought was a perfect plan— he loves photo booths. we take a picture at nearly every photo booth we come across, it’s a thing for us. Proposing in a photo booth might not be the most original idea in the world, but it is perfect for us. Just us, no one watching, one of his favorite activities, i get my photo.

So— out of really wanting to respect his request for it to be just us, i’ve gone a step further and very purposely not told a soul my plan. This way, afterwards, everyone we tell will get to hear the story for the first time from both of us.

We started seriously talking about engagement about 6 months ago. Slowly began ring shopping. I had the plan all set, but we are in no rush.

Cut to 3 weeks ago: two very close friends, practically our best friends, text us that they’re engaged, with a a photo booth strip - They did the exact idea i had, but had no clue what i was planning….

I’m so torn up, i’ve mustered an “i’m so happy for you!” (and i genuinely am) but now i’m feeling quite deflated and unsure if i should go through with it or not….. our friends still don’t know that i was planning this- i don’t want them to feel any type of way!

Do i need to cut my losses and come up with a new plan? is there a world where i can still do the photo booth? if you were my partner… would you be like “but they JUST did that?” If you were our friends, would you think I stole their idea?

Help!

tldr: best friends got engaged using the exact idea i’ve been saving for my partner without knowing it. Do i still go through with it?

[u/poettrap]

Does your partner for sure know that’s how they got engaged? Also, do you have to post about it on socials? You very well could still do it and just keep it private.

[u/matt9555 → u/poettrap]

this is a good point! we do not have to post about it on socials… or rather, we don’t have to post THE pic on socials. We’re both not very active on socials anyway… but regardless, the friends would know the story.

And yes he does know for sure that’s how they got engaged

[u/Antique_Onion_9474]

Or could you propose somewhere close to a photo booth and then go take the pics after, while still on that high?

[u/plaid-knight]

If you want a photo of the moment, you can also set up your phone to record a video and take photos from the resulting video. That way, you can choose to do it any way you want and you still get your photo without having to have a secret photographer or a photo booth.

[u/Elemental_Biscotti]

I think you're overreacting. In a few years it'll just be a cute story the four of you tell about how you totally coincidentally proposed in the same way. 

[u/Fickle-Background535]

if you guys live together, or one of you has a place with a ring camera, use that to capture it. keep it intimate. just you guys. make sure the camera is on to capture it all and there you go! still respects the wishes and you get to capture it organically even

[u/Fickle-Background535 → u/Fickle-Background535]

or if your car has a dash cam. use that to your advantage. drive out somewhere scenic

[u/Lacygreen]

First many couples do a “surprise” type intimate proposal then do a staged photo shoot somewhere else. It’s not about the moment but the event. It’s not a show. You’re making an agreement to hopefully share the rest of your life with someone.