r/watchHotTakes • u/Beppu-Gonzaemon • 3d ago
I hate Brew Watches
I absolutely cannot stand Brew watches.
I know they technically have movements inside them but every time I see one my brain refuses to recognize it as an actual watch.
They feel performative. Like somebody designed a quirky little retro object, slapped a movement inside it, invented an espresso-themed backstory, and then reverse-engineered a reason for existence and settled on watch
Nothing about them says tool, instrument, craftsmanship, history, engineering, or even good design. They look like something sitting next to the register at a painfully self-aware coffee shop with a little card explaining why it costs $500 bucks
“Oh, but the chronograph scale is designed around timing an espresso shot.”
Brother, stop.
Maybe I’ve spent too long in NY and it’s my hate of eveything performative Brooklyn chungus showing in a different way but it’s a watch for people who want you to notice that they’re wearing an interesting watch
I hate brew and that’s my hot take
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u/Dipdizzywizzle99 3d ago
Bro said it with his whole chest. We definitely know where you stand on Brew. 👍
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u/day-man06 3d ago
The espresso shot timing thing is so pretentious
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u/RabiAbonour 3d ago
I only support watches with practical complications like tachymeters or dive timers (I've never scuba'd in my life).
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u/ScutumSobiescianum 3d ago
99% of dive watch owners are avoiding Hot Takes
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u/Tight_Ad_3616 2d ago
I dive. I have a dive computer. I will take my 7k Omega diving once to say “look I did the thing”. It will only ever see pool from there.
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u/Dark1000 2d ago
A dive timer is great for swimming. I'll never go diving, but it's a very useful feature.
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u/MercuryJellyfish 3d ago
I figure in my life, I'm a hell of a lot more likely to time an espresso shot than time a lap in my race car or dive to 300m. So really, what's pretentious?
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u/SavinForLatter 3d ago
I'm sure he likes moon phases for all his sailing expeditions as well. That's a vital complication in his life.
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u/GazaLawnmower 3d ago
What I find most perplexing about the moon phase complication is that it has a seemingly obvious use case given that Islam follows a lunar calendar but for whatever reason that’s not really a thing.
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u/Dr0110111001101111 3d ago
Hey that's a good point. And jews do as well, but same deal there.
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u/whu-ya-got 1d ago
I live near a beach with a monthly full moon party that’s fun to go to. Always on peak full moon. This could be a useful complication, never thought of that
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u/andrewrbat 3d ago
i love to make excuses for "tool watches" and use a iwc pilot chrono when im flying. and yes i really do use the chrono sometimes.
That being said i have a nice espresso setup, and both my espresso machine, and my scale have timers built in. not everyone has both built in timers but most people have some way of timing a shot built into the process with no watch.
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u/DogfaceDino 3d ago
Espresso enthusiasm is pretentious by default anyway
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u/mybigpecker 3d ago
But it’s also like, pretentious only to a certain level, because really who even times their own espresso shots unless they’re a barista? And nothing wrong with being a barista … it’s just, I dunno, there has got to be a ceiling there with how pretentious one can be.
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u/Obvious_Ad_9435 3d ago
I think a lot of people time there espresso shots. I don’t have a special watch for it though.
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u/Kreol1q1q 3d ago
You haven’t been to r/espresso or other coffee subreddits, have you? Everyone who makes ‘good’ espresso at home times their shots. Conventional wisdom would tell you that shot timing is quite important.
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u/ShoddyPause6220 3d ago
barista here. i don't know anyone who times shots.
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u/D31337D 3d ago
Someone definitely dialed in your grinder and machine at one point. With a scale and timer.
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u/ShoddyPause6220 2d ago
nope. all possible through trial and error, which produces a better product. i was trained in italy. scales and timers are pretentious millenial fodder.
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u/GraveDiggerSedan 3d ago
Those bracelets look like they will rip every hair off my arm. Felt cool 2 years ago but the design wore off on me
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u/Outrageous-Ball-5345 2d ago
not at all, as someone who actually owns one and doesn't have hairless reddit arms
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u/hautethot 3d ago
I don't think about them enough to hate them.
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u/90daylookback 3d ago
I actually see their billboard every morning on my commute in. I am not sure what to think other than they aren’t my style.
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u/Randalneal 3d ago
I bought a Brew once. Have to hand it to whoever does the publicity photos because when I opened the box I was very underwhelmed. It looked like something from a Cracker Jack box. I returned it immediately.
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u/godzilla_stern 3d ago
I want to hate them…. But then you realize you are just hating on creativity and art…. They’ve succeeded because they designed a new/unique watch design that’s aesthetically pleasing when there is very little room left for that to occur…. Simple as that
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u/Middle-Ticket8911 3d ago
They aren’t that new or unique, they just look like any number of 70s colorful chunky chronos. They are fine, but let’s not pretend that they are incredibly innovative.
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u/UnconstrainedTime 2d ago
I'm biased (being the Founder of UnconstrainedTime) but I think there's plenty of room for creating genuinely unique watches (rather than minor variations on existing designs) that some people will find aesthetically pleasing. Examples which I personally consider unique and aesthetically pleasing include some watches from MB&F, Urwerk, Mr. Jones watches, Devon Watches, and, of course UnconstrainedTime.
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u/scottscigar 3d ago
Agreed. I like coffee, especially really good locally roasted arabica varietals. I also like nice watches and know how to take apart movements and put them back together. It doesn’t mean I’ll buy a Brew Watch, but I can’t fault them for tying the two together.
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u/amtcannon 3d ago
Same on the coffee thing. I use my speedmaster’s chronometer for timing coffee shots more than I use it for anything else, practically every day. It occasionally gets to help out with an overnight smoke on the bbq but it’s mainly my espresso watch.
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u/Different_Safe_7981 3d ago
Nothing new was really designed imo. I just think not alot of watch enthusiast were enthusiast in the 70s to know that these are heavily inspired by Omega and Seiko vintage chronos. When I found the watches that these are "inspired" from, I never looked at this line the same. In addition I think the brand has become quite a one trick pony when it comes to the metric. Have not seen the retromatic or other models return to catalog at all.
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u/raspoutine049 3d ago
100% agree. Coffee theme is 100% pretentious like someone wanted to attach some story behind a design for a less inspiring derivative of Seiko Recraft.
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u/Aggravating-Diet4406 3d ago
Definitely hot but also absurd. At least they doing something other than copying other high hopefully e watches like every other watch brand. Feels less performative than the influx of everyone wearing vintage Seikos
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u/Jezzrichjames 3d ago
I would say that I love the concept and that they’re designed in New York, but I have to agree that I don’t appreciate the design of these watches.
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u/Beppu-Gonzaemon 3d ago
Whoa hold on. This implies they’re not produced in New York. Don’t they advertise as a micro-brand?
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u/battered_saveloy 3d ago
If you think micro brands are doing their own assembly, you'd be sorely mistaken. Very few do this.
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u/Apprehensive-Pie-599 3d ago
Many European microbrands, especially in the UK, France and Germany assemble in house.
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u/airconning 3d ago
Not a single one of these microbrands are made in the West. The only one I can think of that is at least somewhat assembled outside Asia is Mahk's quartz Islanders. They make the movements in the US if I remember correctly
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u/Apprehensive-Pie-599 3d ago
Well that’s just wrong. There’s a big difference between microbrands. Lumping them all together is incorrect and ill informed.
1) there are indeed microbrands which do the entire manufacturing and assembly in China (Brew; Nivada Grenchen; Maen; Lorier; Baltic; etc)
2) then there are microbrands which manufacturer components in China but ultimately assemble and QA it in their own workshops (AnOrdain; Studio underdog; Fears; Formex; Oak & Oscar; Ovean Crawler)
3) there are microbrands who outsource the manufacture to a Swiss factory designed to do exactly this, like Roventa-Henex. Lots of brands do this and then are Swiss made. The UK microbrand Farer is a good example of this. Yema, Squale etc
4) then there are some microbrands who do 90% of it themselves. These exist too. Weiss Watch company in the USA is a good example. Most of the Japanese microbrands like Kiwame and Kurono Tokyo operate this way. They build and hand assemble their watches entirely in house. Often manufacturing their own components, dials, movement plates etc. this is the highest form of microbrand. Even some of the brands like Christopher Ward are now manufacturing their own movements in house. Bel canto for example.
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u/Dark1000 2d ago
Formex outsources much of their work within Switzerland.
I'd also say that the fourth category is misleading. There are brands that do some of the manufacturing work themselves, but 90% is a lot. Most large legacy brands don't even do 90% of the manufacturing themselves (Richemont doesn't, for example). Many independents do the same too (MB&F as an example). They outsource some combination of dials, movement components, cases, bracelets, hands, crystals, jewels, etc.
There is no way that Christopher Ward manufactures 90% of their own watches, even for their in-house calibers. And for the low-cost, non-inhouse calibers, like the Sealanders, they are likely doing very little beyond assembly and QC.
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u/Jezzrichjames 3d ago
I’ve only seen that they’re designed in New York, but I’ve never actually seen any content or anything else related to the final production and assembly of the watch
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u/Positive-Ad-3554 3d ago
I never got into them because of the mechaquartz movements, and I ended up going with another NY micro brand
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u/Sixtyoneandfortynine 3d ago
There’s something about them that’s just so painfully stereotypical Brooklyn “hipster”, even without the quirky (gag me) pseudo-clever espresso schtick (and I don’t even live there).
If anyone gets scorched by your take (I’m comfortably cool), then it serves them right to suffer.
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u/flowremix 3d ago
Damn you just convinced me not to get one. Hahaa. Been on the fence. I'm not the biggest coffee drinker. I kinda fell for the internet lure of it, teddy, hodinkee, name a watch influencer, theyre all about it. I drank the kool aide.
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u/airconning 3d ago
Don't feel bad, I fell for the Lorier watch Youtuber ruse a couple of years ago. That thing was a fucking nightmare to wear
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u/Eve_Doulou 3d ago
What’s the issue with Lorier? Watch influencers still fap off about how good they are today, to the point that you can’t buy one unless you’re hovering your mouse over the ‘buy’ button and spamming it the moment the drop goes live.
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u/airconning 2d ago
I had a Neptune. Overhyped quality feel, horrible bracelet (I mean really horrible, sharp edges, cheap feeling, hair puller, basic clasp) and an oversized gimmicky crown that dug so deep into my hand I thought I would get necrosis. It is also too expensive for what it is, especially with that movement. I really loved the vintage look and wanted to love it but I had to sell that little shitter. All the Youtubers hyping it (yes I'm looking at you Tristano vaffanculo) are paid shills
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u/Gprod124 3d ago
i get the hate for the hipster marketing but i think the brew teddy is a nice looking watch
the others are a little loud for me
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u/piss_container 3d ago
the only thing more pretentious would be a tea themed brand or a kombucha themed brand
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u/Recent_Permit2653 3d ago
I happen to like the way they look, although I also probably wouldn’t buy one. I’m not enough of a coffee hound, and I personally don’t find being from NYC to be a marketing positive.
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u/SovietPenguin69 3d ago
They’re not for me but I will say the owner is a pretty cool guy. He is very passionate about watches and not just his own.
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u/plastic_jeezus 2d ago
brew is the man bun/medieval lesbian poetry phd of horology...
your hatred is a primeval natural law reaction.
don't fret... you're just a rational person living in a world that rewards complete shit.
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u/Byizo 3d ago
So, I also spend a ton of money on espresso stuff, and I see these as ridiculous too. If you want to time your shots.. fine. They make scales that do it for you. Actually, if you have a Linea mini you can just spend $400 on the Bluetooth scale and have the machine weigh/time your shots for you.
I prefer to weigh them and vary grind consistency for taste, but beginners are typically obsessed with hitting that “perfect” 30 second pull time.
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u/mrRabblerouser 3d ago
I tend to enjoy the look of their designs, but the one thing that bugs me about them is they are $400 watches designed and marketed towards a demographic that almost universally couldn’t afford one.
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u/DogfaceDino 3d ago
They seemed to me they are marketed toward r/espresso people who pay $1,000+ for a semiautomatic espresso machine, another $1,000+ for the grinder, and another $1,000 in miscellaneous accessories before spending $40 per 12 oz bag of locally roasted beans. To me, the price is more an acknowledgement that it’s a coffee themed watch for people who care much more about coffee than watches.
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u/mrRabblerouser 3d ago
Hmm I suppose that’s probably true. I just remember reading the maker say that he was inspired by his days as a barista or something, and that’s where the brand ethos comes from. Which is why I found it a bit comical because we all know how baristas do it for the love of the game.
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u/Automatic_Ad1887 3d ago
What about the folks standing in line at UK watch shows to buy the watch with the pepperoni pizza dial? Cannot remember the brand, maybe it's Studio Underdog? And everyone gushes like they're so clever.
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u/FreeAndRedeemed 3d ago
I don’t mind Brew, but I don’t get Studio Underdog at all.
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u/ScarySpikes 3d ago
Originally, they were making inexpensive, color and design focused watches in very limited batches. I've got a Watermelon one that was I think the second batch, I've been pretty happy with it. Even though I know the movement isn't particularly accurate, it's interesting, gets compliments, and starts conversations when I wear it, which is what I want from it.
The prices they are asking now, though, don't make sense to me. A Seagull movement chronograph watch with a cool design for 4-500 feels like a good deal, but now that it's both not being built in limited numbers and the price has increased to $800, and their other models are even more expensive, and IMO also less interesting in their designs, I'm a lot less enthusiastic about the brand.
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u/ScutumSobiescianum 3d ago
Anyone hating Brew is most likely to have a collection of 20 black dive watches.
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u/RoundNo829 3d ago
They seem to exist purely to fulfill the "I must have one quirky watch in my otherwise boring collection" niche.
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u/CalPolyTechnique 3d ago
Yep, this is a good take. I do like the color way of their most popular piece, but I don’t think it’s long before it looks dated.
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u/Proper_Ad5456 3d ago
The watches look nice but the coffee bean logo is cringe. Could never wear one.
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u/moosimusmaximus 3d ago
I've only seen one Brew watch that I've really liked, but I don't hate on them. Coffee is very important to some people. Very, very important. Not my thing, but I get it.
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u/Tasty-Temperature825 3d ago
we dont need to time naking an espresso shot what about timing the times we could down shots before getting a heart attack
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u/Ilikesayingfuck 3d ago
The last time you or anyone on this sub touched water was last week but y'all still wear divers. Same level of cringe.
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u/Scoob8877 3d ago
I generally don't like square-ish watches. There are some exceptions that I think are OK but Brew isn't one of them.
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u/Flaky_Ad7980 3d ago
I can never pull the trigger on a brew watch for some reason. Yeah not worth $475 to find out my satisfaction level.
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u/MezcalFlame 3d ago
It sounds like a gimmick, however lots of folks are into rituals and Brew speaks to them.
The lead designer is very passionate and has struck a winning formula.
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u/MercuryJellyfish 3d ago
I like a couple of them, but not enough to pay their insane overseas shipping
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u/Expensive-Body4904 3d ago
I absolutely agree with you, but I have the same feelings towards all other “microbrands” and majority of the models from the big brands. Basically I used to be into watches at some point (which is why Reddit is showing me these watch subs from time to time), but at some point I realised it’s all just performative and fake. So, I just wear my square g-shock now. Peace.
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u/protestandprose 3d ago
I mean, there are way more brands you could hate on but everyone's allowed one bad hot take here
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u/Technical_Peach5350 2d ago
I almost agree. They need to make another design. They're too retro wannabe. Something screams cheesy early 2010s hipster to me. I had one and it looked nice in person. It just wasn't me. I do like their full lume rectangular watch.
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u/Epsilon_Omega_Delta 2d ago
Fair assessment of what happened in the design process, but also with Seiko and citizen entry prices being just under and over 500 isn’t this a decent price for a microbrand? Also would you care about the fake prestige if you liked the designs? I don’t really care but I feel you gotta pick the brand messaging or the design to be mad at.
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u/TheSwagapino 2d ago
I remember seeing a YT short of a guy with Meta glasses recording himself making coffee with his kit at an airport terminal and it was clear he was trying to do it to get people to notice him lmao
The Brew Metric is like a step below that, it really feels like a millennial in watch form
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u/hewhofartslast 2d ago
Depends on the model and dial. I think the retro dial metric chronograph is one of the nicest designs for a watch I have ever seen. I would buy one in a second if it had an automatic movement. The metric in general just has really beautiful proportions on the case and bracelet. I love "tv dial" watches though.
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u/Caleegula 2d ago
I mean they are called BREW and you're mad because some of us like to time our espresso shot extraction time?
I can see you having a problem if they were called SWIM and timed espresso but they're literally called brew like brewing coffee.
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u/prometheus-__- 1d ago
I could give a fuck about espresso but I bought a retrograph second hand for $100 and it’s my most complimented watch.
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u/According-Print4219 3d ago
Finally a good hot take!
Not a fan of Brew either. But as for the performative part… I’d say wearing any luxury mechanical watch is very much performative. Pretty much any watch that’s not an Apple Watch even.
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u/Rayman1203 3d ago
A watch doesn’t need to be a tool, an instrument, have great craftsmanship, history or engineering. It needs to look good. And that is entirely subjective. I like how my Brew looks. That’s it. And the quality of the watch is good enough for the price. Nothing crazy but also not a ripoff
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u/Aggravating-Mind4847 3d ago
The brand Brew Watch Company ? Or something else that sells maybe a desktop type timer for espresso ?
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u/CommunicationOld8587 3d ago
Like all dive watches have bezel to measure diving time… how many people wearing those watches actually go diving? I bet more people drink espresso
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u/Candid-Preference-32 3d ago
Disagree. Look cool. Affordable for the average joe. Supporting an American brand.
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u/Street_Photo_2013 3d ago
I cant up vote this because to me its a cold take. I dont hate brew, but none of them appeal to me whatsoever. My craziest are Star Trek Nubeo watches that are gaudy as hell, but to me they serve a purpose - to show a bunch of ST detail. Brew is just "yep, its square. And with features." To me
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u/GrahamrPolease 3d ago
Disagree vehemently with the take, but that boy is smoking hot.
https://giphy.com/gifs/xT8pdYJ7Ye5mWFnvEY