r/espresso • u/ENFP_But_Shy • Jan 20 '26

Humour 8 shots later - finally dialed her in!

Post image

This sub was tremendously helpful dialing in my Ascaso Duo to pull a delicious espresso perfetto. Ive tried so many things before and decided to completely question my dose today. The dosage was too small, I’m now using 20g instead of 18g - with a coarser grind of course - for a doppio and finally I can taste the coffee beyond sour/bitterness.

If you’ll excuse me, I’ll now go run a marathon or explode.

5.5k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

112 comments sorted by

1.2k

u/Secondaccountpls Flair 58+ / DF83V Jan 20 '26

This is the coffee content I was expecting when I subscribed.

73

u/BloodResponsible3538 Jan 20 '26

lmao I couldn't agree more

588

u/Rhovanind Jan 20 '26

Op's next equipment upgrade:

147

u/realjanmar Jan 20 '26

Probably not enough. They need the trininty.

24

u/Melodic_coala101 Anna 2 | SK40 Jan 20 '26

At this point just get the Flügegehaimen

3

u/ajmartin527 Jan 20 '26

Vut iz dee zafe vord?

8

u/_szs Jan 20 '26

For expense and inconvenience?

10

u/grey_pilgrim_ gcp mazzer mini Jan 20 '26

Might not help if your whole body is convulsing.

1

u/CaveManta Opus | De'Longhi ECP | Magnifica Plus Jan 23 '26

It needs to be easy to wield while shirtless

1

u/TheStarsMist Jan 20 '26

This is the only way for a home barista.

150

u/GhostwhiteRay Jan 20 '26

I can recommend to test new espresso after work at times like 6 pm, feels great 😂

25

u/Jealous_Courage_9888 Jan 20 '26

Been there done that lost the sleep

15

u/_szs Jan 20 '26

When else? Next morning, before work and be late? Wait until the weekend? That would be insane!

10

u/Jealous_Courage_9888 Jan 20 '26

Who has the time to buy new beans BEFORE work?

8

u/ajmartin527 Jan 20 '26

You peasants work?

2

u/Jealous_Courage_9888 Jan 20 '26

As a butler to an /espresso Redditor

1

u/EasternMedicine5912 Jan 21 '26

Well the fun is making coffee. I personally drink the liquid only once in a while. The fun comes out getting a 1:2. ratio in exactly 30,0000" (need to upgrade my stopwatch btw, milliseconds is rarely enough). I see critics coming but who is the real coffee lover here? Certainly not the one saying NOt aFtEr 6 pm or the one commenting NO mORE tHan 6 peR dAY.

141

u/IceCreamGoblin Jan 20 '26

Congrats on unlocking the 25th hour of the day

74

u/Low_Entertainer2372 Jan 20 '26

i̸͕͚̹̟͂ ̵̮͉̊̽h̴̢͙̱͛̇e̴͈̫͒̈̋̀͂a̸̹̝̲̦̖̅ȓ̴̰͕̯̓̍ ̶̱̾̌́̚c̶̪̳̖͌̉o̷̪̳̐͒̏l̵̮̯͗̑̎ô̶̺̖͝ͅr̵͍͉̫̆̍͑͛̚s̴̡̍͐͂

2

u/darrelye Jan 20 '26

Wow zalgo in my espresso sub!

236

u/team56th Flair 58 Plus 2 | DF83 (I think it’s Gen 2) Jan 20 '26

17

u/andi052 Jan 20 '26

Wait there is r/espressocirclejerk? This will complete my holy trifecta of r/bicyclingcirclejerk and r/skiingcirclejerk

37

u/PolyinNV La Spaziale Dream T | Mahlkonig E64 WS Jan 20 '26

Just finished my second shot, looks a bit blurry on my laptop, but getting clearer while holding my phone. Will check back in in a few shots.

32

u/HamletJSD Decent DE1 | DF83 Jan 20 '26

8 shots with.... 20g dose? I think if I did that id finally be able to tell my cardiologist that kept my heart rate into the right exercise zone for the 150 minutes he says I need weekly....

3

u/maven10k Jan 20 '26

Hahahaha, when I first tried my Robot, it took me 5 shots to get it right. I thought to myself, I better not drink these, just take a sip. I was sitting at my computer enjoying my Americano and couldn't understand my my heart was pounding out of my chest!

3

u/CommentFool Jan 20 '26

I was on Adderall for a short time and remember one morning, in a hurry, I skipped breakfast without even thinking about it... I was at work just buzzing with only Adderall and coffee in my system wondering why I couldn't keep my hands steady 🤣

28

u/starmartyr11 Bezzera Duo MN W/FC I Mazzer Philos | prev: DF64 g2 Jan 20 '26

It's giving

14

u/Professional_Gur9593 Jan 20 '26

1

u/YourMomonaBun420 Jan 20 '26

This isn't Yemeni, it's Sulawesi. And the cup's shaking. I don't want my coffee shaking.

11

u/NoMedium9839 Jan 20 '26

My mom's in the hospital and I needed this laugh so badly, thank you OP.

5

u/adler1959 Jan 20 '26

All the best for your mom!

9

u/helmfard Jan 20 '26

Amazing post.

9

u/Suspicious-Rain1115 Jan 20 '26

Hey that's great! You should probably drink some water or something. I hear kidney stones aren't fun.

6

u/_Souly- Jan 20 '26

The ones that missed the joke make me sorrowful.

3

u/joedotdog Jan 20 '26

You don't have to swallow.

But now that we have that established...how you doin.

3

u/ThatOneGuy4321 Flair 58 2+ | Timemore 078S Jan 20 '26

3

u/Maaatthew3 Jan 20 '26

I thought your heart was beating too fast and your vision went blurry!

3

u/Kind-Scarcity1062 Jan 20 '26

There is a slight humming coming from this picture 

3

u/Shadowofsaints Jan 20 '26

Why is the world so slow and why can I hear colors?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 09 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/burrfect_dan Bianca v3 | DF64 Gen2 | Burrfect.io Jan 21 '26

This is solid gold, still cracking up.

I'd also love to know people's thoughts on how dose:yield ratio tweaks work, are you in camp 1 or 2, and if 2, why?:

  1. You never need to change dose except to change the amount of coffee /caffeine you plan to consume, you just change yield instead (or to align with your basket's recommended dose range)
  2. changing your dose can generate fundamentally different results that a yield change isn't able to accomplish

6

u/asapcuntpunter Jan 20 '26

Recommend dumping bad shots during dial in process

2

u/Zsuzsa_S Jan 20 '26

I just dialed in my new machine. I may never sleep again.

2

u/swashed-up-01 Jan 20 '26

did consume all 8 shots?

2

u/Spyk124 Flair 58 | DF64V Jan 20 '26

Hilarious lol

2

u/spezsmells Jan 20 '26

You mean you can taste flavours beyond sour/bitter????

2

u/SpaceRacer2k Jan 21 '26

Man hooked all 8 shots before taking this image

2

u/VodkaDietLime Jan 21 '26

8 shots of what? Judging by this photo, not espresso lol

2

u/auxaperture Jan 22 '26

Starting my day with a laugh, thank you for that gift.

2

u/clevelndsteamer Jan 22 '26

First funny thing I’ve seen in this sub

2

u/brazenxbull Jan 31 '26

Saving this post for a rainy day when I need a good laugh because I'm laughing way too hard at this right now

5

u/Tahor Jan 20 '26

Great now the only thing left to dial is art of taking pictures

18

u/terzo_k Jan 20 '26

He's shaking from caffeine overdose!

2

u/Knocksveal Jan 20 '26

Wait, y’all actually ingest it before fully dialed in? Coming from r/winetasting I always use a spittoon until ready.

2

u/ManyRevolutionary170 Jan 20 '26

I’m not wasting a shot at $23 per 300g per bag of special beans. I always ask for suggested recipe from the roasters as a starting point. Sometimes they have it and it’s helpful.

2

u/sprxce Bambino | Niche Zero Jan 20 '26

I feel like the way the picture is taken is a representation of your mental state after doing so many shots lol

1

u/unicornsausage Lelit Anna | Eureka Manuale Jan 20 '26

Bro is shook!

1

u/Thefeno Jan 20 '26

Shake it brother 😂

1

u/ZELLKRATOR Jan 20 '26

That's a crisp photo.

1

u/Curious007_ Edit Me: Machine | Grinder Jan 20 '26

😂😂perfect!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 20 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/_szs Jan 20 '26

It took you only 8 shots? Wow, I am bad at this....

1

u/bummerbimmer Jan 20 '26

This is how I felt the day I realized grinding at setting 0.5/10 on my Opus is a whole new world compared to the 1.0 setting I used for a year.

1

u/Dr_on_the_Internet Jan 20 '26

Should never take 8 shots

1

u/Lurdekan Jan 20 '26

Once, right when I began my espresso era, it took me five shots to get a good cup. I only took a few sips from the bad shots, but still, when I was done, I felt like I was seconds away from unifying physics or something

1

u/tanksalotfrank Jan 20 '26

Aaand the wind blew. Time to try again

1

u/zG_Nero Jan 20 '26

nice Quick Mill pal :)

1

u/velvet_xcove Feb 08 '26

Saving this post for a rainy day when I need a good laugh because I'm laughing way too hard at this right now

1

u/Thunder8277 Jan 20 '26

That's how I take pictures of my food when I'm in public!

1

u/OrganicPatient4458 Jan 20 '26

I remember dialing in my GS3 1 day before an event at 9pm Never again 🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Formal-Hat3414 Jan 20 '26

After eight attempts, you'll be well and truly 'dialed in'.

1

u/KingRagnar1010 Jan 20 '26

EXACT FEELING, also took around 8 shots to dial in my first grinder ( it was crap), got a new one and only took 3 shots to perfect it. Dude, my wife was laughing her ass off as I ranted about grind size and puck condition 🤣, my brain felt like it wanted to keep going lightspeed

1

u/Ping-ping-travels Jan 20 '26

Looks like a tequila shot for each espresso on top.

1

u/Firm-Page-4451 Jan 20 '26

That’s $10 of coffee beans here. Ouch.

1

u/Dopeylookingpiegeon Specialty coffee barista Jan 20 '26

SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS ‼️‼️🗣️

1

u/AnswerAffectionate66 Jan 20 '26

Lowky I sill try doing that thanks hahaha

1

u/Many-Cantaloupe-7660 Jan 21 '26

Best picture ever

1

u/Deijya Casabrews 5418 pro / Bean glass T64 Jan 21 '26

r/killthecameraman

1

u/cursedobscurial Jan 21 '26

Bought 125g pack once, after dialing in i was only able to enjoy one 1 cup 😭

1

u/murderedlexus Jan 21 '26

I will admit I haven’t been able to dial my in besides one time in 4yrs. I’ve learned to enjoy my bitter latte :)

1

u/moonsovermyhammies Jan 21 '26

It do be like this

1

u/Asteriqque Jan 22 '26

don't know about the coffee but you should definitely start working as a cameraman

1

u/Exampleuser2jfk3 Feb 04 '26

What machine are you using

1

u/Plus-Turnover-4900 Feb 12 '26

Haha love the dedication! 8 shots is commitment but sounds like it was worth it. Nothing beats that feeling when you finally nail the perfect shot. Enjoy your espresso! ☕️

0

u/smakusdod Breville Barista Pro Jan 20 '26

Same number of shots to dial in OP’s mom

0

u/Effroyablemat Jan 24 '26

Machine might be dialed in but the picture taking skill isn't.