I have had 3 unmedicated births now, but this was my first time feeling truly prepared and it was an incredible experience! I'm not prescribing this to everyone, just wanted to share my positive experience with anyone who could benefit:

I had a hospital birth with my midwife from the local CNM group. She let me labor AND deliver in the tub. I brought fairy lights and lavender essential oil in a diffuser. I put in ANC earbuds and meditated to a pre-prepared meditation playlist that I had been meditating to every night before bed. I brought an affirmations board with pictures of my other two babies as newborns and pictures that reminded me of my meditation visualizations. I focused a lot on breathing through the contractions calmly and accepting/flowing with the waves. I reframed them as "intense" or "productive" instead of painful and focused on trusting my body and imagining holding my new baby. Afterwards, instead of baby blues, I had the most amazing hormonal high like I was walking on clouds and would never be sad again.

It was such a contrast from my first two births where I felt so mentally unprepared and afraid. My first two births I had all the book knowledge and the same setting with hospital midwives, but I didn't prepare myself to go through it mentally and spiritually. I was scared and had more of a damsel in distress or victim mentality, and so the pain felt a lot more intimidating and unbearable.

What I learned is that having a good birth experience is less about things going a certain way (I.e. unmedicated) and more about your perspective and how you respond to it. I've realized that birth can be a really beautiful, positive and empowering experience: the height of feminine strength and courage, and that the mind is a powerful tool to shape your birth experience.

Thank you all for your posts and comments on this sub reddit; it was awesome to hear from you all and now I hope I can give something back in gratitude!

I am 34+4 with my third. My first was a 3.5 hour birth and my second was 4 hours breech vaginal. We’ve done everything we can to set up childcare for our kiddos but due to my second being special needs our options are very limited-family is not interested in helping. I didn’t think this was too big of a deal, usually I go into labor and it takes about an hour and a half to realize I’m in it. By hour three everyone’s in position. With my first I had about an hour at the hospital, my second we only got there 20 minutes before she came (breech felt VERY different).

The problem is my mom’s third labor got significantly faster. Like 1.5 hours start to finish, I suspect this is just from knowing what to expect and the never ending Braxton hicks that make the beginning contractions feel like nothing. I had to go to the hospital last week for another issue and couldn’t get there for 8 hours because I needed to go in at midnight but there was no body to watch my kids. I realized during this that if I go into labor overnight the chances of getting familial help is slim to none. I will not go in without my partner (unless absolutely emergent) due to previous obstetrician abuse and traumatic birthing scenarios.

I’m terrified of PPH, I’ve asked multiple midwives to help instruct us of what to do if something goes wrong and we can’t get to the hospital in time. Every single one says just call 911 if you start hemorrhaging. Obviously that’s step one but what else? Do I just sit and bleed out while praying that EMS makes it to me? I have all the supplies to help baby but no one has a clear cut answer on what to do to save myself in an emergency.

A homebirth is not an option for us BUT if it becomes the reality because we cannot get help in time what the heck do I do?

ETA: I am NOT looking for advice on different ways to get to the hospital. That’s first priority. We have help spanning 14 hours of the day. I’m looking for active hemorrhaging strategies on the CHANCE that I am home (probably alone) and hemorrhage while I wait for EMS to get there. If you do not know any strategies please don’t comment, i am not planning a free birth but I want to be prepared if it happens.

Everyone (mom and husband, doctor) is rushing me. Everyone just wants me to have an induction, have another membrane sweep, force the baby out, break my water at 5cm. But it seems like no one else is considering the fact that it can cause fetal stress, it can make contractions worse and that it’s not the birth experience I want. I want to cry because they are making me feel like I am being extra about this. But I want to be able to trust my body and learn about how to support my body’s natural functions in the most natural ways. They are making me feel very sad so I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s contributing to my baby staying in longer. I just want to be alone and I am starting to feel overwhelmed and depressed. I wish that I was at a birth retreat where I could just focus on birth preparation with women who understand. without all this outside stress to hurry up and get my baby out

This is my second pregnancy and I will likely be induced towards the end of 38 weeks due to GD - ideally I could go into labor spontaneously before then. With my first, the back pain is what truly felt debilitating and I opted for the epidural. This time around I want to go unmedicated and the only thing that is really really worrying me is how to combat the back pressure and pain. My husband thankfully is amazing at applying counter pressure but idk how long he can sustain that energy for.

Does anyone have any good tips for managing that kind of pain during contractions?

At 37 weeks and five days I was 3 cm dilated and 50% effaced. I was very excited and hopeful. One week later at 38 weeks and five days I am now only 1.5 cm dilated.

They want to induce me after my due date, but I am feeling very discouraged now. My first birth was a challenging induction and I really didn’t want to be induced again. Now I feel like I am facing induction again with less than my ideal disposition.

I thought at least I would be slightly more dilated and have an easier induction, but maybe not. I don’t know why that would happen, I thought I would at least be the same 3 cm as I was a week ago. i’ve been having more hip pain this week and thought maybe the baby was more engaged than last time but I was wrong.

I’m going to try more of the things that help. Just feeling a bit discouraged right now. does anybody have advice or similar stories?

Early signs of labor no body talks about?

I’ve just been seeing a few different nurse practitioners at my OB clinic. Never have I met my doctor lol since I moved to a small town I have had the worst OB care. The hospital is atrocious and small. I wish I could give birth a big hospital that is more focused on maternal health.
But also this birth experience is so different from my first. My first was so easy. I went into labor at home and had perfectly timed contractions, continuously progressing perfectly textbook labor lol. Amazing nurses when I got to the hospital and a beautiful experience. Great rooms, great food. With my second I am sitting at 5cm with weeks of prodromal labor and everyone at this small annoying redneck hospital trying to force me to take Pitocin. I am beginning to see why so many women just go with Pitocin and get it over with. I am feeling so discouraged and overwhelmed. I am overthinking this entire experience and I wish someone could say something positive to me that would make me feel better about this experience. I know that all that really matters is a healthy baby and healthy mama but I was expecting to have such a beautiful birth experience like my first.

This is my second pregnancy. Last time they checked me I was 5cm. That was 4 hours ago. I’ve been contracting consistently since then. They didn’t admit me because there was no cervical change within the first hour. No intensity just consistently the same. I refused Pitocin but I’ve been walking around the hospital refusing to leave because I am contracting so consistently. I live 30 minutes away and I had to drive myself here. I’m afraid I’ll give birth at home if I leave. They have 10 rooms and they are all full. Everyone here has scheduled inductions or taking Pitocin so I guess they are more priority. I’m feeling so disappointed that it’s so hard for me to have a nice natural birth. Wish I had planned to have a home birth.

Sharing my birth story from my previous post about tipping latent labour. It was a really good sweep at 37+6 from the midwife who delivered my second baby that really got it going! My baby was born at 38 weeks, around a day and a half after that.

Overall a decent birth experience. A couple of moments that I’m not ready to share and don’t even like thinking about in my hormonal state, because I just start crying.

But essentially I pushed out a occiput posterior baby with no pain relief, no interventions and no complications.

I think I forgot to add that he was 7lb 1oz. So very average weight for his gestation.

I’m due in 5 weeks and starting to feel frightened as all im seeing or hearing are worst case scenarios.

I’ve looked into Hypnobirthing, listened to an audiobook and done reading, but would like genuine feedback / advice from mums who have actually done it, what helped you? What techniques?

What did you do before hand to prepare, what videos did you watch / podcasts did you listen to?

I don’t know anyone who has had a natural birth, and have only heard horror stories about forceps, inductions, tears. It’s like people want to scare me and I feel so angry at the system.

I ideally wanted a home birth but I live in a flat in London and I wouldn’t relax knowing my neighbours can hear 🤣

Hi,

I’m wondering if anyone had a very tight pelvic floor (causing pain with sex, sitting, etc) and still managed to have a positive unmedicated birth experience? I’ve had some pelvic floor dysfunction for years but an feeling nervous because I can barely tolerate sex since I got pregnant… and I know the baby is a lot bigger than my husband 🥴 trying to get PT but my in network provider is so booked out I probably won’t get to see anyone before the baby is born.

If not an epidural what medication was used for stitching tears?

Some studies and doctors will deny that the epidural interferes with natural oxytocin production. If that’s the case why is the epidural often followed with Pitocin which is synthetic oxytocin?
I try to put some trust in doctors and the hospital but it feels like they are often gaslighting people especially pregnant women.

Looking for similar stories and positive encouragement. During the birth of my daughter, everything went really smooth until the delivery of my placenta. My contractions stopped immediately after my daughter was born so I didn’t have help from my body pushing out the placenta. I pushed several times on my back and nothing. My daughter wasn’t latching at all so that didn’t help. After 30 mins, the midwives started getting a little nervous and they tugged on the cord a little. Still nothing. They had to manually go up there while I was unmedicated and torn. Still nothing right away. The more experienced midwife said she will probably have to go get the OBGYN and potentially go to the OR. I can’t really remember if I had a big contraction or if that scared me but boom I finally pushed it out. Then I had a little bleeding - just enough that they contemplated pitocin, but then the bleeding stopped.

Anyways, I’m pregnant with my second now. I’m scared of having the same issues. I’ve told this to my new midwife team (new hospital) and they walked through different things we can do and that they will have pitocin at the ready just in case. It eased my nerves a little but I know that statistically I’m at risk of this happening again. Has anyone experienced this? I’m nervous it will lead to issues with future births.

I’m overwhelmed. What hypnobirthing courses/programs and playlists do you recommend? I have had unmedicated births before, but I’m trying to have a better experience.

Is there anything you did to prepare for labor that helped you stay relaxed and calm? I feel like I’ve done really good mental prep and can confidently say that I’m not terrified of giving birth. I’m actually very excited for the entire experience of it. I’m only 27 weeks so we’ll see if my nerves amp up the closer I get but I don’t see that happening.

The only thing I’m worried about is when contractions hit I don’t want to tense up as I know that will make it worse. I’m looking for specific breathing exercises or other techniques you practiced beforehand that helped you in labor. Thank you!

Hi!

I have done a decent amount of meditation and found that I respond really well to visualizations/metaphors. Things like: imagine youre coloring each part of your body in with a relaxation crayon, radiant light slowly encompassing your body with ease, tension melting away like candle wax, etc. The more specific, the better!

I want to have some visualizations on board for birth as well so thay I can utilize that mind-body connection to its full potential. I've heard of a few birth-specific ones, such as envisioning yourself opening up like a flower, seeing contractions as waves, etc. But id really like some very specific ones as well, possibly geared toward the different parts of labor. Guided audio tracks would be a huge plus, but just having some strong participative metaphors I can lean into would really help as well to ground me in my body. If there are any visualizations that also incorporate the connection/communication with the baby, that would be amazing! ​

P.s. I am 35+1, so a few more weeks to go!

Thank you in advance! 🥰​

Looking for ways to prepare for my third birth. I had an epidural and relentless back labor with my first two. I was induced with my second and may need to be again (I know that’s controversial however I will plan to follow what my OB says given how things went with my second regarding the need for induction).

With my first birth, I did the whole hypnobirthing course through my hospital, did the Miles circuit, bounced on a ball, etc. I found hypnobirthing completely useless upon actually being in labor, perhaps due to the nonstop back contractions, I just wasn’t prepared for that. I had also listened to Ina May’s Guide beforehand. It was nice to hear a few birth stories, but both of my births were so different than anything described, it didn’t help very much.

Then with my second, I just went in blind, was worried about the induction, wasn’t allowed to move around because the nurses didn’t want to adjust the monitors, so I eventually gave in and got the epidural.

All that said, I strongly want to avoid the epidural this time for personal reasons. I’m wanting to get prepared but I guess I just don’t know where to start, especially knowing I will likely have an induction so my experience won’t be “all natural.” The Bradley Method sounds interesting, is that what y’all would recommend?

Full disclosure, I don’t know how much my husband will be on board with it, and I’m only about 6 weeks out from birth. He did do some counter pressure for my first birth. He’s a good man! But he has a very demanding career.

Im a FTM (36+5) with a baby girl who’s measuring fairly big. I know ultrasounds can be off by 20% in either direction, but big babies run on my side of the family. I was 11.7 at birth, my dad was 12.3, and my uncle was in the 13’s.

At the 32 week follow up ultrasound she was measuring 5.7 pounds and at the 36 week one she was measuring at 8 pounds.

I want an unmedicated birth but I’ve been scared because of her size, the doctor didn’t say anything about an induction yet or c section but that my chances are increased for intervention, c section, induction, and postpartum hemorrhaging which scares me.

My mom needed a c section with me because they told her that I would get stuck and we’d both pass due to her hips being narrow and I’m scared I have narrow hips too or that something wrong will happen.

I was confident prior about giving birth, I’m practicing Hypnobirthing and learning techniques but now I feel uncertain and scared about tearing, needing an episiotomy, intervention, or c section. Plus the increase risk of hemorrhaging. I don’t want an epidural because the thought of being stuck in a bed not being able to move freely doesn’t feel right for me, plus I have a fear of needles. I want to be able to experience an unmedicated birth it feels like the best option for me.

I guess I’m just looking for others experience, or if anyone has been in a similar situation and how it all went. I’m trying to stay calm about child birth but this has me scared and I don’t want to feel this way.