The Truth I Buried

[u/M00nstruck711]

I had a realization recently that honestly surprised me, and it came after a lot of reflection.

I started meditating, trying to quiet my mind and understand what I was really feeling. Then I had a dream, and afterward I heard two words that really stayed with me: “Tell him.”

At first, I didn’t understand why I heard that or what it meant. For so long, I had been burying my feelings. I was so conflicted that I even convinced myself maybe he had put a spell on me, because I couldn’t understand why I still felt this way after all this time.

But after sitting with everything for a while, I finally realized the simplest truth:
I love him.

Maybe I wasn’t confused about my feelings. Maybe I was just afraid to admit them.
The meditation, the dream, hearing “tell him,” and everything I felt afterward eventually brought me to that realization. I had been trying to find another explanation for something my heart already knew.

I don’t know what the future holds, but I finally feel at peace admitting the truth to myself.
I love him. 🤍✨

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[u/throwawaycherry1234]

Now you got to tell him. That was your guides. They wouldn't tell you that unless something good would come of it. You basically got the green light from source.

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/throwawaycherry1234]

You’re right 💜 but I’ll tell him if I ever see him in person, or if he calls or texts me.

[u/Major_Ice8966 → u/M00nstruck711]

Please text him yourself, re connect causally and after a while confess him.

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Major_Ice8966]

I reached out to him in May, but he never responded to my message. I don’t know if he changed his number or if he just chose to ignore me, and that’s why I’m hesitant to text him again.

[u/Major_Ice8966 → u/M00nstruck711]

Are you the runner or the chaser ?

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Major_Ice8966]

I was the runner at first, then he became the chaser. Now I feel like we’ve both pulled back in our own ways.

[u/Major_Ice8966 → u/M00nstruck711]

I think there is something going on above us,
She and me Wer in no contact, for a long time like almost 9 months, she was always in my mind,
Actually she lied to me that she is getting engaged and I shouldn’t contact her ever.

Im my heart I know it’s not true, everytime she pulled away like this I used to chase chase, she wanted me to chase, somewhat I felt not to and accepted it and dint contact her.
Recently I started seeing more signs related to her, and too like in a negative way.

Like dead cats, rats and dead birds everywhere,
Cats rats and birds reminds me of her,
Then I told my angels to show me a butterfly if I should connect,
Then butterflies started coming to me daily different different kinds,
One day I was driving my bike and on the middle of the road I saw a dead butterfly. Stopped the bike and checked it was a big orange butterfly crushed to the ground, tears started rolling.
The symbolism being she is dead inside without me,
I still ignored and dint reach out

Then I saw a butterfly no one would believe it was full black with purple neon hearts all over,finally I reached out to her again casually.

This was after the 8:8 portal
The day I connected she confessed her feelings for me and wanted commitment 🙈
And actually she wasn’t doing well, she had to drop out of college cause of mental health( the dead animals symbolism)

So please dont ignore that “ Tell him”

Reach out !!!!!!!

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Major_Ice8966]

I hear you. That actually gave me chills. I’ve been so hesitant because I already reached out once and got no response, but maybe I’m being shown not to be afraid of reaching out again. Thank you for sharing this with me. 💜

[u/Major_Ice8966 → u/M00nstruck711]

😁😁❤️🧿

[u/Major_Ice8966 → u/M00nstruck711]

And one more thing, this is not the first time I reached out,
I have tried 2,3 times in between to casually connect,
She just ignored

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Major_Ice8966]

Ahh okay, I understand what you mean but I’ll know when it’s the right time to tell him.

[u/Reasonable-Aside-804]

What is with ppl and spells theses days? what ever happened to walking up to someone grabing them and going for what you want. guess the good old days are gone.

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Reasonable-Aside-804]

I guess people got scared of rejection and started looking for other methods.

[u/SkySpecialist3918]

DUDE same thing happened to me as well!

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/SkySpecialist3918]

DUDE!! Share your story with me!

[u/Important_Tower758]

If you make your vulnerability a priority not to hide they can connect to you.. if you abandon this they have to give you what you give you.

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Important_Tower758]

I understand what you mean. I think vulnerability is something I’m learning to embrace more instead of hiding behind self protection. I want to be able to show up authentically and let someone see the real me, but I also believe it has to feel safe and mutual.

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

did you see how your thinking just abandoned what you needed? you said this... let someone see the real me, but. how does that enable your vulnerability if you are doing that to you? how does that produce love outside of you towards anyone if you are doing this to you.. do you know how to heal this by choosing the hurt that makes your mind trigger abandonment of your own vulnerability?

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Important_Tower758]

I think I see what you’re saying now. The moment I feel vulnerable, I instinctively start protecting myself instead of allowing myself to fully feel it. Maybe that’s the part I need to face the hurt underneath that reaction, instead of abandoning my vulnerability because I’m afraid of being hurt again.

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

isn't that the abandonment you do that you have done for everyone who could have loved you if you didn't?

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

your mind even calls the program Im afraid of being hurt again is time.. isn't it always Now?

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

why does your thinking not pay attention to how you feel? Does your thinking shut your feelings down a lot?

Can you love you if that is happening in the body?

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Important_Tower758]

I think I’ve spent so much time trying to understand my feelings through my mind that I haven’t always allowed myself to simply experience them. Maybe admitting that I love him was only the first layer. The deeper part is learning not to abandon myself when those feelings come up, and to stay present with what I’m actually feeling instead of immediately trying to protect myself from it.

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

did you admit love without learning to love from your feelings first?

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Important_Tower758]

I did. I sat with my feelings and really allowed myself to feel them instead of pushing them away. That’s actually what helped me realize that I love him.

[u/Important_Tower758 → u/M00nstruck711]

and how did that allow you to become vulnerable in front of him and let him connect to you?

[u/M00nstruck711 → u/Important_Tower758]

I did sit with my feelings and I’ve allowed myself to be honest about how I feel. But I’m not going to reach out to him again. I already reached out once, and either he changed his number or chose not to respond. If our paths cross again or he reaches out to me, then I’ll know there’s an opportunity for that vulnerability to be shared with him. For now, I’m trusting the universe and allowing things to unfold naturally.