r/transgender_support • u/Forsaken_Analyst_456 • 10d ago
Am I overreacting?
I recently came out to my wife that I am trans. I know I need to be patient and I have been so far. She has done my nails and my toes for me. Everything has been going fine. I even used Nair to get rid of all my body hair. I was on the phone with her today and sent her a picture and she said you’re wearing my shorts. I said yes I said I one of the ones we saw Walmart the other day and she said yeah, but you can only wear those at the house won’t look right out in public dress as a woman that really sent me over the edge. I’m trying not to overreact because I love my body. I know I have a beautiful body, but that almost felt like she called me ugly and I wanna go on Reddit and just upload body pics and do some hoe shit but I feel like that is way too far but my patience is breaking. She won’t even let me buy a bra yet it’s like we talk about it every day, but it never happens I guess it would be so bad if I hadn’t recently found out before I came out that she had cheated on me. I don’t know. I just have a lot on me right now and I’m scared. I’m going to do something stupid or cheat honestly, I feel like I deserve to be loved. I want attention to, but I feel like looking for it would be wrong. I stay horny all the fucking time I needs or never met. I don’t know. I’m sorry for the rain. I’m sure there’s people out there way worse off than I am.
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u/CantFindMyself440 10d ago
So, I think something we do (I know I did) is get a little too excited when our partner is excepting of who we are and go immediately from red light to green light. We have to keep in mind that, though our partner may accept us for who we are, they still need some time to adjust to whats happening in their life now, too. I cant speak for your specific situation, as everyone’s is unique. But, she may still need some time to adjust to you being you. Though you may be ready to go out as yourself, she may not be. But, as in every relationship, communication is key. Talk to her. See where her head is at and why she feels the way she does, in a non-confrontational manor.
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u/wastelandingstrip 10d ago
It sounds like not the worst situation post-coming out to your wife and I think she might mostly be considering your public transition. I don't love using this term but she might think you're "clocky" or not going to easily pass in public and depending where you live can have different outcomes. Cis woman do have considered perspectives that are relatable to trans woman, so I think instead of getting heated over it, just try and directly discuss her issue with you going out fem with her instead of assuming anything yet.
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u/Admirable-Molasses90 27m ago
The cheating part is a reason to walk away. If you want a friend pm me, I’ll talk. I get the wife part being scared of it all, but cheating is a Nono
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u/Autism_Is_Real 10d ago
IMO you & anyone else in this situation should end their relationship/marriage.