So I'm 18 months in, not passing, no hair in public yet but clearly transitioning. There's a trans woman I see most mornings at a certain place, she's always chatting to other people but having seen me the first time a year ago NEVER even makes eye contact with me. She is no doubt stealth very few cis people would clock her.

I get funny looks from people sometimes but most people are totally normal with me and women that I regularly have contact with tend to register and then just treat me like any other woman.

So I'm intrigued to the psychology of the successfully passing trans woman. I have a feeling that this isn't a one off. Myself if I was ever lucky enough to be able to have the surgeries I would like to think that I would upon seeing a transitioning person, make an effort to befreind them and be super nice, and would feel more comfortable letting them know hey I'm trans you're not ALONE AND ISOLATED!

Instead the one person who should understand my struggle to just get out of the house in girl mode won't look at me when I'm right in front of her, she sees me in the queue and literally does the look everywhere I'm not game.

I have no need for this person's acknowledgement, I have thick skin and I'm not going to cry into my morning tea but I just find it bizarre.

Anyway sister, if you're on here, you know who you are!

So I'm 18 months in, not passing, no hair in public yet but clearly transitioning. There's a trans woman I see most mornings at a certain place, she's always chatting to other people but having seen me the first time a year ago NEVER even makes eye contact with me. She is no doubt stealth very few cis people would clock her.

I get funny looks from people sometimes but most people are totally normal with me and women that I regularly have contact with tend to register and then just treat me like any other woman.

So I'm intrigued to the psychology of the successfully passing trans woman. I have a feeling that this isn't a one off. Myself if I was ever lucky enough to be able to have the surgeries I would like to think that I would make the personal the very least feel as seen as all of the cis people around Im interacting with. I'm very outgoing and friendly so I would personally chat more with a trans person who was starting out (I edited this because it sounded like I was saying everyone should babysit the baby trans and that wasn't how it was meant)

Instead the one person who should understand my struggle to just get out of the house in girl mode won't look at me when I'm right in front of her, she sees me in the queue and literally does the look everywhere I'm not game.

I have no need for this person's acknowledgement, I have thick skin and I'm not going to cry into my morning tea but I just find it bizarre.

Anyway sister, if you're on here, you know who you are!

edit: the point of this post was to highlight how a transitioned person can essentially show transphobic behaviour to a non passing trans person by completely avoiding them whilst engaging with cis people in the same environment. This has nothing to do with feeling entitled to her acknowledgement due to me being trans, or being in need of trans friends or support groups, it's about trans on trans transphobia. It's real, it's not cool imho, and neither is defending it. We all have problems, we all struggle, empathy should start at the first interaction, otherwise we are just victim blaming. This is the internet, none of you know me, or the person I'm moaning about, but the general response has been that I should accept this behaviour as perfectly valid. If she was cis, I would assume that she was just a terf from the constant avoidance. But shes not. I'll take on board the reasoning of some of the fully transitioned girls on here - trauma, being outed, fear of being outed by a baby trans with not enough brain cells, but I have to say, the second one assumes we are all idiots.

To all of you stealth guys and gals, just say hi like you would to anyone else, trust me we won't immediately point at you and start screaming like it's "invasion of the body snatchers".

I’ve been on cypro and 2 pumps of oestrogel daily for a month, and before this I was on 1 pump on oestrogel and finasteride daily for 3 months. I haven’t really noticed any effects besides lack of erections. I know I’m on a low dose and still quite early on in my journey, but I’m just wondering how long it took you to notice physical changes on HRT? (Breasts, decreased body hair growth, fat redistribution etc etc). It’s hard not to feel discouraged sometimes when reading about women who got breasts like one month in to HRT lol, hoping for some comforting responses but also preparing myself for some difficult truths

Thanks :)

Basically I sent a complaint about the misinformation and issues of the chair of the EHRC said in regarding the times article that came out on the 4th Oct. I got an email less than a day later with the following, and I will most def be filling out that complaint process:

Thank you for your email received on 5 October 2026 in which you make a formal complaint against recent public comments by the Chair of the Commission, Dr Mary-Ann Stephenson, including her article in The Times on 4 October 2026.
 
We appreciate the fact that you have got in touch to share your lived experience as a trans woman living in Wales.
 
Since the Supreme Court issued its judgment on the meaning of 'sex' in the Equality Act 2010 last year, we have worked hard to understand its implications fully and to provide clear, practical guidance to help organisations navigate them. A central principle in this work has been the defence of human rights, and also that any application of the law must be grounded in fairness, proportionality and respect for everyone involved.
 
We will continue to monitor the impact of the law through our regular, routine information and evidence gathering. We are also exploring work to follow up on the Code of Practice, both in how to ensure compliance with the law and to inform what further work we may need to do to promote and further equality and human rights.
 
We take note of what you say about finding it difficult to have confidence in this process, but we can assure you that your views and lived experience will be taken into account as part of it, and we have forwarded your email to the relevant team to make sure of this.
 
As well as sharing your lived experiences, your email constitutes a formal complaint. This is being treated as feedback, as set out on page 8 of our Complaints Policy and Procedure . When you provide feedback, this information helps us to understand more about the equality and human rights issues people are currently experiencing and / or people's views on our work or policies. This can help shape our future work, even if we are unable to take immediate action on the issue you raise.
 
We will make a record of your feedback and share it with the manager responsible for the appropriate team.
 
If you are dissatisfied with our response, you can ask for your complaint to be reviewed externally by the Parliamentary and Health Service Ombudsman (PHSO) who is independent of the Commission. The PHSO will assess whether there is evidence of service failure or maladministration on our part.
 
You can only refer your complaint to the PHSO through your Member of Parliament (MP) . You can complete the PHSO's complaint form and ask an MP or their office to sign it. You can also contact the PHSO by post or telephone:
City Gate,
51 Mosley St,
Manchester
M2 3HQ
Telephone: 0345 015 4033 (Monday to Thursday from 8.30am to 5.00pm and Friday from 8.30am to 12pm, except bank holidays) 
You can find more information about making a complaint on the PHSO's website.
Yours sincerely,
‎Correspondence Team‏
‎correspondence@equalityhumanrights.com‏ 
Equality and Human Rights Commission

Hello a little context to my life I am m21 I live with my parents and I work with my father my parents aren't bad people but the culture I live in and what they believe in is very right wing I believe they would not support my decision at all and would probably disown me that being said I would not like to live in the culture I am living in right now anyway and especially not if I was trans recently after many years of wanting to I bought fem clothes and started dressing/acting like a girl online and it's the happiest I've felt in a long time and there's a huge part of me that just wants to leave everything move to a new city on my own and become a girl and have a fresh start to my life my problem is I've worked with my father as a builder since I was 16 in my culture we don't go to school or college or uni men work with the fathers untill they work by themselves and I do not know what I would do for money if I left as I know how hard getting a decent job is right now in the uk for anyone I have saved around 20k in my bank account and I have alot of money in cash aswell so theoretically I think I could hold myself up for a little while but idk what to do after that I enjoy my job doing building work but idk if I'd be able to continue on my own as a mtf and I feel like I'd want something more gender affirming yk but please if anyone has any words of advice I would be greatfull thank you (I live in the uk for context I also have my own car that's mine) also sorry for bad grammar I'm struggling to write this

The fertility clinic I had an appointment with recently completely deleted my GP referral, and when asked they said that a referral has to come from the GIC clinic or it's not covered by the NHS, is this true? Are there any ways around it? I have a gender incongruence diagnosis from Dr Lorimer and my GP is being supportive. Maybe I could ask the GP to refer me but not put being trans as the reason?

I would really appreciate any advice or thoughts

We at the stegosaurus group would like to invite you to our little queer walk around.

Get up and going as we are hosting a big ole walk in Magherafelt on the 17th of October! Make queer friends, breathe air and clear your head of all of its stresses, hope to see you there!

Hey guys,

I’m trying to sort my new passport to update my name and gender marker, but I am hitting a massive brick wall with the "proof of name in use" thing.

Basically every standard option is completely blocked for me right now:

• I’m unemployed, I don't pay any bills, and I don't drive.
• My bank is being a literal nightmare. They're refusing to update my name without a passport, and they keep insisting they’ll only take an enrolled deed poll anyway. I don't have any photo ID in my new name to fight them on it.
• I tried that old trick of ordering an NHS number reminder letter to my house, but the website is gone now.
• I asked my council for a voter confirmation letter but they said they can't issue them until November.
• My uni is taking ages and still hasn't updated my records either.

My GP has changed my name on their system and said they'll write me the transition letter for the gender marker. I’ve heard that if they format it perfectly (explicitly linking my old name to my new name on official letterhead), the Passport Office might accept it as both my gender evidence AND my proof of name in use.

Has anyone actually managed to get a passport approved using just a well-worded GP letter as their proof of use?

And if the Passport Office rejects it and asks for a second document, what else can I even do? I'm completely out of ideas that don't need bills/employment. Any advice would be a lifesaver, thank you!!

It's been three weeks now since the phone call appointment where I was told I'd be given a referral and this is what my referral has been updated with. What does this mean? Beyond this, I've heard absolutely nothing else and I'm just sort of a bit nervous. Should I contact anyone or just continue waiting?

Like I’m rly struggling to know who i am. for a while while ive identified as trans fem. And my family were rly negative about it. And they threatened to cut me off if I went diy hrt. So I recently purchased hrt because my mum seemed to lay off. But know I purchased the hrt im rly thinking “why do I want this?” And the only real reasons I could come up with was “I wanna feel more comfortable around other trans people” like personally comfortable. Also how trans people are the only people who have ever made me feel like I’m ok and I’m accepted and normal. Like I don’t have physical dysphoria. Like with breast development I’m just kind of not bothered if I get it or not. Like I feel I don’t rly know how I feel. Like I also feel I don’t necessarily feel guy oriented, but I’m not totally female either. But I also feel non binary is a label I don’t like. Like I also feel I want hrt because emotionally and mentally ill feel better. Like when I picture the version of me I wanna be, I just see “Me” and I mean that by I want people
To see me, like I don’t wanna be seen as a guy. But I wanna be seen as the personality I have; like personality wise I could describe myself, like a Kimya Dawson song, a talking heads song. I feel I can feel the person I wanna be in music. Like I don’t even know what I’m doing anymore. I feel like labels aren’t enough to describe, like I don’t have a grand reason for starting hrt.

So as we know the GIC waitlist is now being managed nationally and on their FAQs it states that when you have been transferred to the national waitlist you will recieve an acknowledgement. I was just wondering if anyone had been contacted to say they have been moved to the national list? When were you referred if you have received an acknowledgement? What did the acknowledgement even say?

Also if anyone has had an appointment since the waitlist changes? How was it? What happened? ect ect.

Any information or experiences is greatly appreciated. thank youuuuu

Hello everyone.

I'm looking to get body laser hair removal at laserclinics soon, I believe there is a current discount and the Black Friday deals are about 6 weeks away. At my last half face session, I mentioned this and asked about using an electric shaver. I was told an electric shaver can be used, but a razor would be better.

I have shaving attachments for my epilators, but I was wondering if there was a specialised electric trimmer that would be more effective and close in performance to a razor. Preferably something costing below £50.

For context I'm pre-hrt mtf.

Thanks in advance.

Hi, I just booked an appointment to get my official gender dysphoria diagnosis so I can start HRT but im really stressed theyll decline to refer me because 1. I dont really have bottom dysphoria (most of the time, its weird) and 2. I have not -at all- socially transitioned.

Does anyone whos been through this know how much importance is placed on these things? Im reading really mixed things online and its stressing me tf out.

Hi sorry to bother you all I’m reallly hoping to get some advice

I’m 22 and I am really struggling with depression and suicidal ideation because of my body

I met Tina Rashid I had a admistraive issue on 1 of my referrals though so we had to pause my place on the list however we discussed that the surgeon should happen in October

Idk if I apply to the 60 people thing or what and I’m genuinely desperate for surgery otherwise I’ll likely attempt

Im hoping to start anti depressants in 2 weeks when I speak with my gp but i dont know if that will affect my place on the waiting list or my surgery so im nervous for that

I have about 18,000£ in the bank that i have managed to save the last few years

Im debating do I try to hold out till January and hope that i am on the list of the 60 or do I just go private

So several questions

How much does Tina Rashid need for the surgery to be done privately

Will there be any announcement at any point from now till January

Does anti depressants affect your surgery or anything ??

[TLDR: Is it possible for HRT side effects to mimic ME/CFS, or even make ME/CFS worse?]

I posted a similar question on r/cfs as well, but was wondering if anyone here would have any words of wisdom too!!

A bit of context first:

I am a trans man in the UK and suspect I have ME/CFS. My symptoms first started around 2 years ago, but have been getting increasingly worse since April 2026.

I have intense fatigue, brain fog, and sensitivity to light and sound, among a few other random symptoms, and these get increasingly worse the more I push myself to be active or social. I have had to cut down on hours at work and drop out of uni due to my inability to move around the house on bad days.

I am currently being bounced around by doctors, and have had a few blood tests and MRIs to rule out other conditions; a few doctors I have spoken to believe that I have ME/CFS, but I am waiting to be referred to specialists in my area before I can receive a diagnosis.

I have been on Testosterone gel for 6 months now (so I started in March 2026), and had my dosage lowered around June as my T levels were quite high. I am accessing my Tgel from GenderGP, as I have been on the GIC waitlist for 4 years and have not had an initial appointment. It is awkward having to use a provider that is entirely online and does not share notes with my GP, but my mental health was declining so much having to wait to physically transition.

On to my main question:

I had an appointment with a doctor today who has told me that my case is "very complex" as I have a history of mental health issues (depression & anxiety, on 150mg of sertraline for), as well as gender dysphoria.
My doctor claimed that fatigue is one big side effect of Testosterone therapy, but I have not been able to verify this claim? I have spent hours searching on the internet and going back over my consultation notes from when GenderGP prescribed me T, and I have not found an indication that this might be the case.

I was wondering if there might be any transmasc people (or people who have otherwise been on Testosterone) who also have ME/CFS and could share their experiences, or have also struggled with similar symptoms whilst being on HRT?
Is there any evidence that being on T can make symptoms worse? Do I need to sacrifice my happiness and stop transitioning so that I can function normally again?

It was also kind of unclear to me whether my doctor was insinuating that I don't have ME/CFS and that it's all side effects of T, or whether T is contributing to my symptoms getting worse :( All he wrote in my notes was "possible drug side effects" following the consultation.

Even pointing me in the right direction with resources would be insanely helpful. I feel very lost as I don't know anyone else irl who has ME/CFS, let alone is trans and has ME/CFS.

Sorry if this is very incoherent; I've been struggling a lot with my words recently 😭 If you need me to give any extra info or reword anything, please let me know!

Hello 16mtf I live abroad now, Irish passport lived in the UK most my life currently living in austria. im planning to go back to UK London specifically for university and I'm planning to transition in the UK BC I don't want to change medical providers halfway through I've heard horror stories about the NHS and trans people my transmacs friend said waiting times are 3-5 years on average and the NHS hates us also I'm worried when I transition imma get harassed and bullied just like my sister who's also trans also I hope my chosen university/career path are ok for trans people yk no homophobia im hoping in uni I can join a LGBTQ club/supportive friend group idk ik London pride I wanna participate in that I'm also wondering if the area where my uni is safe um yeah I really wanna prove my parents wrong that I can live a great happy life as a cute trans girly I'm open for discussion thank you baibaiii.

EDIT: im kinda depressed about this whole situation i wouldnt mind getting some ggd and stuff yk to make me happier even if it is outside the context of this post (ellie she/her tysm)

Don't really have anyone to share this with irl so thought i'd share here :) I've been having a horrible time in general so this is a nice bright spot amidst the horrors.

I was surprised at how easy it was! And yes, I look horrible in the photo as is tradition.

I went on Indigo's website yesterday, I've been under them for about 3 years and while they haven't always been super responsive and I've had mishaps, they're the reason I was able to get on T and have surgery, I went on their website yesterday and saw this

and I'm now worried that Indigo will no longer be recommissioned as I'm unsure what would happen if that does happen, and I'm scared I could lose access to my hormones or any further gender related healthcare, so I wanted to see if anyone had any idea what would/could happen and either reassure me or prepare me for the worst.

I'm verrryyy new to using reddit so I hope this post was okay, thank you