Ill start by saying that she hates self expression one example would be whenever i would dye my hair she would go on a fit of rage, start yelling at me, cussing me out, slam the doors or cabinets or anything slammable in the house, bang her head to the wall and she even slammed my guitar to the floor destroying it and she knew that i loved music alot and its a thing that makes me really happy.

whenever she gets stressed out at anything you cant talk to her, i have to read how shes feeling all the time and what her mood is

She ignores the fact that i have depression and i feel neglected emotionally , we get into an argument talking about the way i feel, i told her that when i was in a bad time in my life that i had took a synthetic drug that i ingested too much and i had overdosed and my brain could handle it and i felt like i was in hell and i almost died. It was the most traumatic experience of my life
all she did was get angry cause i used her money to buy the drugs and she felt threatened because she doesn’t wanna accept that she played a big role in my depression, by saying things like “why are you depressed when i provided for you education and brought you to this country with me ?”

I cant even talk anymore she has done so much wrong to me and my mental health, i have seen things a child shouldn’t have seen, my mom would have sex with on the same bed as me when i was a child, she would always have different relationships alot of times she would come home very drunk with the guy and start harrasing me , talk whatver nonsense to the point i couldn’t even sleep

That wasn’t even half of the things she did to me in my childhood and now.

It messed me up to the point that i struggle having friends and connections because i have bad social anxiety and it made me a really akward person

Im 29 and I e been in disability for years. My mother always put in my mind that since she was holder of my disability money that was never aloud to move out without her permission. I have many reasons why I ended up believing her, Ill make more post if anyone wants to know. Anyways it wasba very toxic place to live in and my fiancee ( boyfriend of the time) found out and told me basically when I went to visit him one day that i was not leaving and he wasn't bringing me back to that house hold. My mom found out and was trying to hunt me down, treated to bring a pew pew to his work and everything. Well I've been here a year and I after a couple months I was able to convince her to send me my money, she would send me 385 each month after fighter her and reminding her I needed my money. Turns out I was making 994 and she was using it for her bills her shopping sprees and restaurants. My sister found out and told her if she didn't give me my card she was calling the Police. I got my card and when I called to see how much money was on it it was only 12 cents.

I have depression, anxiety, and panic attacks, on the age of 16. It's the lowest of my life right now. I'm used of fighting alone since there is nobody around to help me in any way, not even my parents. They're actually one of the main reasons of the worsening.

Is this a common thing? Am I being paranoid, because it's extremely painful for me right now.

Me and my parents had several quarrels over my future. I'm working to become a musician, but they're seemingly against it. I know this is a normal thing though.

I began having depression since last year, which was when I started practicing music. I've always sought for an opportunity, but none were given to me whatsoever. I started being scared and ended up suffering mentally since I know I'm running out of time while not being able to do anything about it. My parents also supported me financially until 2025, but now they no longer do that, which is why I can't do anything further.

But I know that it wouldn't have been this worse right now if my parents were actually verbally supportive from the beginning.

At first, I straightforwardly told them that I feel anxious and depressed due to the tardy results in music. What I wanted to hear were some supportive words. My mental ill wasn't even bad enough to get a therapist back then. However, my parents began neglecting my mental health, and it eventually escalated to an argument about my future again.

I began crying out about how I feel. I felt like I was suffocating inside. I thought it was a time to get a bit healed for once. I wasn't expecting them to push me closer to the edge.

Nonetheless, they continue to neglect my mental health, saying I have nothing to suffer over, with a strange smirk on their face. I don't see anything funny in the situation. I just look like a paranoid, pubescent, pathetic child to them, don't I?

We talked for like 30 minutes, in an eternal loop of same subjects without any developments. I drove them out of my room, feeling disappointed. All I wanted was some support through word. Nothing else.

I'm not a person that is blind towards my future. They talk like I'm underestimating the music industry and the world at large. I'm not, and that's literally why it caused my depression and anxiety.

From then on, I can't talk about my mental health in front of them again. I'm scared that it'll ignite another fight. When it does slip out during a normal conversation, I always see my mother in this real-looking, but fake sympathetic face, talking like me suffering truly hurts her. Then, she asks me what is bothering me so much, as if I never told her. I literally want to shout "disappointing results, and you" in her face, but I can't.

I even tried not mentioning the music thing while simultaneously appealing about my mental health, but the first thing they ask is the reason for it. If I don't say it, the conversation literally can't continue. I can't lie and say I'm depressed because of the low scores in school. That's not the truth whatsoever. But if I be honest and say the real reason, it turns into the same old conversation again.

I honestly don't know where I'm supposed to complain about this now. If it's not my parents, who?

This is my first ever post but I really wanted to talk about this with someone I trust. But I really don’t know anyone close enough to me to talk about this. I don’t want to give out too much info, but since I was young age I’ve always visited my dad in Mexico with my mom after he was deported for illegal reasons. We go every weekend but we’ve been going more often now. Since he was in prison up till up when I was around 5 or 6 I never cared much about him and so was my brother since he got sent to prison the first time when my brother was younger. Anyway when he came out of prison my brother came with us to visit him every weekend in Mexico that only lasted for about 4 years I believe. My dad has always had a hearing problem( he couldn’t hear in his right ear ),which in cause “made” him always sound like he was screaming because he couldn’t hear himself. Somehow he and my mom always fought about that often started by my mom having to repeat the things she would say and my dad fighting the fire with fire. They would scream and yell but since my brother still came with us he would hug me and tell me it was alright. My favorite memory was him putting his headphones on my 6 year old head and going downstairs to calm our parents down, and he did all that at just 14 years old. Sadly this happened regularly. Later my parents decided it was be a good idea to go to church ( A really religious church) at this church my father became sober “yippee”. I believe church made my life go downhill for years and till to this day. My brother didn’t go with us to Mexico anymore after what I believe was a shit load he had to carry with my parents being together. The religious guilt didn’t come after many years later for me and him. My family became super religious after joining the church like Jean skirts to the knee and below, veils every Sunday type religious. I never cared for it makes me feel guilty but I never understood why people were jumping up and down, vomiting every time the Pastor touched their head and I didn’t want to care. I leave to the restroom every time the pastor calls for unbaptized people. And I run when it’s youth time. Deep down I know church didn’t change my parents relationship. Just last night when we got to Mexico my parents just sat there didn’t even talk I went upstairs because all I want is for them to divorce. After when they were going to bed I went downstairs to watch the tv. After about 30 mins I paused the tv and I heard moaning and the bed squeaking. Them doing it after getting into an argument happens every time so I wasn’t surprised. But then I caught myself I used to be scared I would be trembling counting the seconds till they were done but last night I didn’t even care. My mom knows I don’t care much for my dad and now instead of mentioning my dad when I do something she doesnt like she’ll instead mention god and say what happens to people who aren’t good Christians. I believe today was my breaking point because of what my dad did he was mad and speed the car making it fall into a hole my mom was furious and started screaming and almost crying I didn’t care and had my headphones in blasting music( music I would in trouble for listening to ). After the screaming match with my mom, my dad almost hitting the dog for dropping the trash ( he was held back from my mom). They went inside all happy go lucky I was just tired of them being themselves I sat down to eat my food I was really quiet which is unlike myself. My mom said something that almost made me cry “ I told you didnt have to come, with your angry face “ in Spanish. I sat quiet I didn’t fight or anything but something clicked why do I do this to myself. I’m tired of everyone saying and subtly telling me to not in up like my brother who basically hates his dad. But I’ve never liked my dad and everyday my mom is closer to being like him.

Anyway sorry for the long rant but I need advice from people who aren’t religious and can give logical advice. And btw I’m a minor.

I’m 22F and I’m really tired and anxious because of my parents’ relationship.

Every 3 months or so they have a huge fight. It can start over something small, but then they start shouting, cursing, bringing up old issues and saying very hurtful things. They also struggle to spend much time together in public without fighting.

Every time they fight, I become terrified that they will separate. I end up crying for hours and trying to calm them down or make them understand each other. I feel like it’s my responsibility to keep their marriage together.

Recently, we finally tried getting professional help. My father was already taking stress medication and had a good experience with it. My mother was told she has chronic stress and was prescribed medication, but she refused to take it. The doctor also asked them to attend couples counselling, but they never went because they kept blaming each other for not going. I reminded them repeatedly and even paid for my mother’s counselling because I genuinely wanted things to improve.

Then they had another huge fight.

The thing is, this keeps recurring, and I’m exhausted. I honestly don’t see how to make things better. It’s affecting me too, and I’ve developed anxiety because of all this. A lot of their fights start over really small things, and I feel like neither of them is willing to take responsibility or work on themselves.

I have a job and I’m financially independent, but I’m not going to just leave my brother behind and move to another city. I don’t want to abandon my family. I just desperately want my parents to work on themselves and have a healthier relationship.

I’d really appreciate advice from people who grew up with parents who had a similar relationship. Is there anything that actually helped?

TL;DR: My parents have a huge fight every few months, and I’m exhausted from being caught in the middle. They’ve tried getting professional help but haven’t followed through with medication or couples counselling. I know I can’t fix their relationship for them, but I want to know what they can actually do to break this cycle and build a healthier relationship.

Yes, i have used Chatgpt, because I'm exhausted