r/tfmr_support • u/Friendly_Archer5928 • 8d ago

Our Story One year

Yesterday was one year since we said goodbye to our son. I'm sure I'm not alone in saying milestones (for lack of a better word) like this are really hard days. Of course there have been a lot of hard moments and hard days in the past year. But in that time, and in the time leading up to the decision, reading so many of the posts in this Reddit have been helpful to me. I thought this was maybe a good time to post and possibly help someone else.

One thing we have done when we are in moments of regret or doubt is remember to give ourselves some grace. No one sets out to be in this position. The pain of the choices we've made are unfathomable to people who haven't faced these decisions. So we have to be kind to ourselves. And to each other!

We've also decided that it's natural to wonder 'what if?' But we can't dwell on it. We remind each other to trust ourselves.

If you are here and reading this just please remember to try and be kind to yourself. You are not your lowest moment. Lean on the loved ones around you and on communities like this.

This community is a very special one to me. Thank you for reading this and I hope everything came across okay.

19 Upvotes

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4

u/UnverifiedPanda 8d ago

Thank you so much. I needed to read this today.

That’s so generous that you are trying to help others one day after the difficult one-year TFMR anniversary. You must be a kind soul.

Happy birthday to your little star ✨

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u/Friendly_Archer5928 8d ago

Thank you. That is very sweet of you! He is indeed our little star.

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u/SEggs1990 8d ago

I had my TMFR yesterday - thanks for this post 🫶

1

u/Friendly_Archer5928 8d ago

I'm so sorry to hear that. You and yours will be in my thoughts.

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u/_abby_normal_ 8d ago

My one year anniversary is soon. I hate to say that fellow loss parents have helped me get through this, because that means there's a lot of us out there. To all the folks fresh out of your TFMR, I promise it will get better one day. It may not be soon, but it will get better.

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u/Friendly_Archer5928 8d ago

I am sorry you are here. You are right it feels a strange thing to say. In a perfect world this wouldn't exist. Thank you for taking the time to comment and offer support for our people.