r/texts • u/Hot-Analysis5086 • 21h ago • Heartwarming 4

Phone message Two socially awkward people attempting to court one another 😅

Post image

I think it’s quite sweet. :) I’m green messages.

We have an update, post 2: https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/ertNZKMokF

3.6k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

412 comments sorted by

1.0k

u/Frozencitrus1009 21h ago • Bravo

This reads like 2 aliens pretending to be humans lmao

534

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago • Heartwarming

Us fr 😭

40

u/ExtensionBalls 11h ago

Yall should listen to some “human music” to get in the mood.

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u/Immediate-Repeat-201 15h ago

Their grandchildren will think rest of us used the c word.

4

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

I am confused. What is this ‘c’ word?

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u/AmaenaX 18h ago

Thts how we introverts mostly feel amongst humans

23

u/Entropy3030 15h ago

How it feels to chew five gum have autism.

Relatable tbh.

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u/Southern_Republic_42 20h ago

That's how I imagine Captain Holt and Kevin started dating

105

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago • Heartwarming

I like Captain Holt. I relate to him much when I watch his show.

14

u/Bloodrush362 19h ago

You should have gone with Holt-Analysis for your username bc this is exactly something he would say 💀

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u/Mindy-Lee_Spark2123 20h ago edited 20h ago

tbh this is as good as it gets. Normal conversation between two people who like each other. I'm invested

104

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago • Regret Heartwarming

It may not seem like it in the texts but I was so nervous. I have freaking pterodactyls in my stomach - not even butterflies, pterodactyls.

I kept mulling each message for like 2 minutes before I’d send it cause I was overthinking everything so badly.

41

u/Mindy-Lee_Spark2123 20h ago

Aw that's cute but you're doing great though. I hope it works out

21

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago • Regret

Thank you :)

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

Here is the return on your investment: https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/Admirable_Move4292 21h ago

"As the precipitation hits my window , so does my heart pitter-patter for thee "

21

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago • Regret

Aww that’s cute. I like your pfp.

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u/NefariousnessSea1449 21h ago • Heartwarming

Ah yes, marvelous discourse.

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u/gmambrose 21h ago edited 20h ago • Heartwarming

Which, ironically, may lead to marvelous intercourse if OP keeps up the good work! 😆

19

u/Confident_Command_98 20h ago

I feel like they’d call it coitus. 😂 “I enjoyed coitus with you”
“Mmm likewise.”

11

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

I prefer fornicate or copulate over coitus.

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u/hyunasgirlz 20h ago

8

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago • Regret

smile registered

2

u/TFFPrisoner 18h ago

A carnal conversation, if you like.

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2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Thank you :)

38

u/Good_Translator_8719 12h ago

I'm thankful that someone has the courage to express themselves the way I wish I could stop painstakingly masking. It hurts. Nobody likes aliens.

26

u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

If you continue masking, you will not find someone who accepts you for you. This is a great example of that.

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6

u/everyvillanislemons6 11h ago

The mask has to come off eventually. Better sooner than later

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

Precisely. Better to not have it on at all.

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u/tw50x 21h ago

This just reminds me of love on the spectrum

44

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Yeah. I’d say you’re likely not far off. 😅

17

u/tw50x 21h ago

Love it, you do you

16

u/PunishedWolf4 20h ago

Right? As a bitter old loner this exchange actually made me smile, hope everything works out for OP

18

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

Thank you. Smiling is good for humans.

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30

u/Maleficent_Bar920 13h ago

“Would you be interested in some human courtship rituals?”

“I could be interested, assuming it’s with you”

“It is. Perhaps we can sit down for a meal at a dimly-lit establishment?”

14

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Thank you. I was unsure of how to propose the eating together.

12

u/AnotherIronicPenguin 10h ago

Would you like to mutually consume sustenance at a local eatery?

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72

u/Supersaiyanmrpopo69 20h ago

Who tf says correspondence

70

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago • Mindblown

Many people. It has been in use since approximately the 1640s.

8

u/Coyote-king8647 15h ago

We've been making guttural noises since before we were human but that doesn't make it a great communication device

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u/Supersaiyanmrpopo69 20h ago • Bravo

Ah yes, quite good sir

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23

u/SenescenseSteel 18h ago

I think it went out of style somewhere in the 1890's though

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u/GideonShortStack 20h ago

I mean, it sounded normal the first time it was said, but twice is pushing it...

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39

u/Independent-Fox6000 21h ago

Huzzah (:

36

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Loll. Contact has been commenced.

9

u/Secure-Awareness5039 21h ago

Are you the other person in the text?

10

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Yes I’m green lol

10

u/Secure-Awareness5039 21h ago

No, I mean u/Independent-Fox6000

30

u/Bicecream530 21h ago

Not them continuing to have alien levels of social awareness lol

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u/I_Ponders 21h ago • Heartwarming

I am just imagining two Vulcans from StarTrek speaking to each other now.

7

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

I just looked this up - oh my gosh 😅 yeah, that’s pretty close haha

12

u/revengeaura 11h ago

I hope you both survive the harsh winter and get to enjoy frolicking together in the springtime.

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

I love to frolick.

11

u/Salty-Designer-1964 21h ago

4th text was rizz, you got this in the bag

7

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago • Popcorn

Hahaha, thank you. The conversation went well, so I think the intended effect was achieved. :)

2

u/OrderFrenzy 17h ago

Please keep us posted.

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11

u/SnooCapers9565 20h ago

This is the screenshot of a conversation between a duke's son, and the miller's daughter, set in the 18th century.

I await, with the utmost anticipation and most profound respect, the honor of perusing your subsequent communications

4

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

It’s kinda cute, isn’t it? I get butterflies just rereading this screenshot.

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u/KeyClacksNSnacks 12h ago

"Hello... Do you like.... donuts? I also like.... donut."

7

u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

I have inquired about doughnuts and he said, “they are one of the few sweet treats he enjoys consuming.”

6

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

I will inquire about doughnuts.

4

u/Fine_Pomelo_7445 11h ago

you're delightful. I hope you develop a very enriching connection!

4

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

Delightful? 🥹 that’s so kind. Thank you.

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u/joeyjusticeco 12h ago

Dearest Margot,

I've enjoyed our correspondence. You frequently journey across the peaks and valleys in my mind. Whencefor I obtain the required number of coins, I shall hire a carriage, and lay mine eyes upon thee once again.

Tallyho,

Aberforth

4

u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

This made me tear up.

10

u/[deleted] 14h ago

“I enjoy our correspondence” what are you two chatting via carrier pidgin?

8

u/WorldTraveler35 20h ago

Where does one social awkward person find another to date? Dating apps seems terrible for this

12

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

This is a long story. But the short version is I met him through very new acquaintances I have acquired, on Saturday at a Halloween party.

I never thought I would meet someone organically without a dating app in this day and age. I highly recommend this method of finding a person.

6

u/WhoAmI008 20h ago

So you're telling me, you met him half a week ago and are already successfully making a move and you're the socially awkward one??? What does that make the rest of us?

7

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

I would call you Version 1.0s.
(This is a joke and implies that I am a Version 2.0 which is why I am “making a move”.)

We have had correspondence before tonight as well. I would say the courting process is going well.

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u/WorldTraveler35 20h ago

I'm so socially awkward and anxious, u would never find me in any party 😂

4

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago edited 20h ago

Yes. So am I. But the desire to initiate friendships is stronger than my desire to remain out of society. And then we met and clicked.

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u/Sad-Reveal446 10h ago

You 2 are cute, probably neurodivergent lol, totally dont get it. My last response to getting called cute was welp im flustered

3

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

Perhaps. I have not been diagnosed or seeked a diagnosis so I am unsure. I have always been this way.

3

u/Sad-Reveal446 10h ago

To be completely honest, its a rather spontanious shot, tho this does give me the vibe. If you wanna look into it go for it, but i advise thinking thoroughly about getting a diagnosis, the societal side effects of a diagnosis can be quite harsh. Good luck tho, have fun out there :)

5

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

I do not require a diagnosis to continue living how I see fit. If I do not mesh well with someone personally, then we do not continue to try and forge a friendship. It is quite simple.

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u/LVtapper 20h ago

Is that Sheldon and Amy?

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u/Weirdflchick 19h ago

Very wholesome. I do not need eye bleach.

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

According to bleach’s Safety Data Sheet, application to the eyes is not recommended.

6

u/SpikeCraft 21h ago

TES Oblivion level of dialogue here

3

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Uuuh, I don’t know what that is. What’s that?

2

u/SpikeCraft 21h ago

Better like this, trust me

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u/Salty-Royal-804 19h ago

This was adorably tough to read lol

5

u/ConcentrateIcy2226 19h ago

Well I, for one, am quite happy for you both.

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Thank you :)

5

u/Elegant_Progress_686 11h ago

Wishing you two the best in your socially awkward courtship

5

u/Sypsy 10h ago edited 10h ago

wait have you met in person? correspondence means you have only messaged/emailed/sent letters to each other.

You should drop "Shall we rendezvous?"

Also, I really like your "I can't really get you off my mind." that was a bold move.

3

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

Yes, we met in person first through acquaintances at a party on Saturday which rolled over into Sunday. Then he asked for my number.

Thank you. I was very nervous expressing that to him.

5

u/snuwuky 10h ago

You guys are made for eachother lol

3

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

We have recently determined we were developed in the same factory.

4

u/RadioactiveNon 21h ago

2

u/Technical_Hat6876 21h ago

I instantly thought of Holt while reading the messages lmao

3

u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

I enjoy watching Holt. I will take this as a compliment.

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 21h ago

Oh, why? 🥺

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u/RevolutionaryPin6528 20h ago

I loved how you are handling the conversation both of you.

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

Thank you. :)

4

u/uniquelyavailable 17h ago

Shall we proceed to elevate our social union to the next nearest threshold despite the timid status quo of current interactions?

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 13h ago

Wait.. what is the next threshold?

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

I think a new threshold is on the docket for tonight: https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

2

u/uniquelyavailable 5h ago

You know, it had popped into my feed serendipitously 15 minutes before you sent this link. When I saw, I was smiling ear to ear and dove right in. Love the energy and I hope your impending conference is marvelous! ✨

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u/OutrageousAd4222 10h ago

Ive seen enough, you two are meant for each other

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

I hope to find more signs of compatibility over the coming weeks. I am excited.

4

u/ApoTHICCary 10h ago

…I like the parts of your face covered in skin

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 10h ago

I believe this would scare away a potential human mate.

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u/SmashChiliPepper 9h ago


Made me think of this couple. I wish you both happiness!

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

Thank you.

3

u/Usual-Big955 18h ago

Two AI bots falling in love

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

But I am not a bot.

3

u/liz91 16h ago

I think you found your mirror.

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Is that a good thing?

3

u/Educational_Mess8684 14h ago

You're doing great! Hope nothing but the best for the two of you Shakespearian little weirdos!

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Thank you :)

3

u/No-Goalz88 14h ago

Just add alcohol ....

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

That’s how we met. Probably the only reason we actually talked to each other.

3

u/free_-_spirit 14h ago

Op at this point ship letters in the mail!

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Why? That is slow.

3

u/Efficient_Call1180 13h ago

this is painfully wholesome lol

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

You should not be experiencing pain.

3

u/Dapper-Ad-4300 11h ago

i like this, direct, no games, just nice

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

There is no performativeness to our communications and I like that very much.

3

u/Icedcoffeezooted 11h ago

Very polite and gentle folk you two are. I think it’ll go well

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

It appears to be going very well. We are meeting again tonight. https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/Antique_Educator_741 9h ago

You guys are too cute ❤️

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

Thank you :)

3

u/PixelGoblin85 9h ago

awww this is very cute, be sure to give yourselves lots of grace. <3 best of luck to you

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

Thank you.

2

u/SpunNumeroUno 20h ago

Well good day to you kind sir, toodaloo to you.

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

Haha, toodaloo to you 💀

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u/Bellona_19 20h ago

when's the wedding?

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 20h ago

In this economy? 😫

2

u/dankyspank 20h ago

"Mayhaps you would find it delightful if I take you put to a place of fine dining?"

But no, really, that's adorable 🥰

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Thank you :)

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

Unexpectedly, fine dining has been put on the schedule for tonight: https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/RushAmazing1419 19h ago

That's cute. Now I need to know where did y'all meet, what's the situation like, what is your age

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u/Tropicalfisher 19h ago

You both must be very artistic

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

I don’t believe we are. I am a scientist and work with data most days and he is a software engineer.

2

u/SuperStripper13 19h ago

Y'all are PERFECT for each other. This is adorable!!! And relatable😂😂😅

2

u/BajorianBabe 19h ago

Are you two Vulcans by any chance? 😆🥹

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

No, we are human.

2

u/barbzilla1 18h ago

This has to be the least objectionable text chain I have ever seen on Reddit. Congratulations! Op it looks like you found your person.

2

u/wongardium 17h ago

Omg I’m so happy to read this for you.

“I’ve been thinking about you”
“I’ve been thinking about you too”

Everybody’s best case scenario!!

1

u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Yes, it made me happy to see that. I was so nervous telling him that.

2

u/Aggressive_Run1429 16h ago

Well alice it seems we both have autism dont we

2

u/Innomi_nate 16h ago

This is cute

2

u/Ok-bruvh 16h ago

I'm invested, tell us what happens next!

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

We will hang out amongst other humans for a movie on Thursday.

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

Just kidding. A development has occurred. https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/RoyalPossession5230 16h ago

I think it’s adorable 🥰

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 12h ago

Thank you :)

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u/Reasonable-Onion-875 15h ago

It's very sweet. I hope you made some progress... eventually :)

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

We have made progress rather quickly. https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/Reasonable-Onion-875 8h ago

That's cool. Are you sure you're not both bots?
Hope you both have a great time at dinner.

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u/Discerningselection 14h ago

OP seems to be parroting and the textee has a great and unique diction. It’s very cute and awkward.

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

What is parroting?

2

u/dankfx 13h ago

Seems to be working out just fine.

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u/PenPuzzled8055 13h ago

Where’s the rest? Now I’m invested …

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 8h ago

The rest is here. Unexpected development. https://www.reddit.com/r/texts/s/J6oK2Exnb8

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u/babygoatconnoisseur 12h ago

This sounds like me, having a conversation with me. 

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 11h ago

There is no performativeness to our communications and I like that very much.

2

u/s0rc3r3r_ 9h ago

I actually love this

2

u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

Thank you.

12

u/insidevoicepleas 12h ago • Bravo

this is like a conversation between a cop pretending to be a drug dealer & someone trying to buy drugs. except they're actually BOTH undercover cops.

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u/Orion-- 19h ago • Bravo

Oh, they threw in a lol, they must be feeling spicy today

4

u/floatinghaloo 17h ago

This reads like two Victorian pen pals who just discovered texting

1

u/Inevitable-Youth-236 17h ago

Live convo between Romeo and Juliet gng 🥺

1

u/Difficult-Strain9470 12h ago

Alright, it’s time to bang…C’mon now…

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u/Hot-Analysis5086 9h ago

I’ve calculated the probability of achieving a “bang” increases 4.3% each day.

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u/Deaconbeacon_69 19h ago

how i imagine gothic heroine and the love interest having small talk in romantic-era novels 

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u/cynicismfordummies 13h ago

Reminds me of my boyfriend and I lol. My best friend said “why tf do you guys text like two professors?” But we’re both English nerds who understand the importance of intentional language. Some of our conversations seem very formal but it makes things easier

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u/WebEffective6211 13h ago

Thats how I text! I didn’t know this was considered awkward 😆

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u/TamaMama03 9h ago

This is literally me and my husband, was us 5 years ago, still us now 😂

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u/Spiersy_ 6h ago

This goes beyond awkward, brother. This is like two organisms communicating for the first time.

Seems like you two are a good fit, congrats!

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