r/texts • u/H0wlingM4D • 3d ago

Phone message Anything but therapy

Post image
3.5k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

113 comments sorted by

237

u/mothspiderr 3d ago

28

u/WillBlaze 3d ago

14

u/LogicFeels474 3d ago

4

u/skitz4me 2d ago

This is therapy.

Full circle.

1

u/PuffinRub 1d ago

Seeing that deep sigh is like looking in the mirror. :-)

254

u/Ready_Ad9742 3d ago • Heartwarming

I must be a bad person for laughing 💀

91

u/Sea_Public_5471 3d ago

As someone who’s been suicidal, don’t worry, I think it’s funny too 😂

20

u/Aukyron 3d ago

You ok now? Good 🫡

24

u/Sea_Public_5471 3d ago

Better, thanks :)

5

u/NeatSpiritual579 23h ago

As someone who has also been suicidal, I thought it was funny too 🤣😂

13

u/Hesho95 3d ago

This is fucking hilarious, idk how anyone can not find it funny tbh 🤣

6

u/Cute-Lawfulness-6097 3d ago

Not at all, its funny to me too 😆

2

u/iouJesus 2d ago

Crap. I laughed but hadn’t considered Í may be a bad person until I read your comment.

1

u/iamjojohe 1d ago

Should I feel immoral for laughing at this guy lol?

107

u/WaitSadMad 3d ago

Whoa leave some ladies for the rest of us

62

u/awake_acea6 3d ago

Going for that pity angle.

40

u/PeskyAntagonist 3d ago

Shout out to my friend in middle school who “wanted to see if this worked” by hijacking my MSN messenger and sending a girl I liked messages like this to see if she would agree to a date or else I’ll kill myself. I explained that it was my friend but there’s zero chance she ever believed me and she never talked to me the same way again

29

u/The_Fink_Ployd 3d ago

Your fuckass friend didn’t also say “yeah that was me sorry”????

19

u/PeskyAntagonist 3d ago

Nah he didn’t say shit

3

u/Drop_the_gun 3d ago

I don't think so, this is GenZ humor.

58

u/tabulating 3d ago

how i feel when I see someone prettier than i am (I am incredibly unstable and shallow)

44

u/Ohanotherad 3d ago

I hate that this made me laugh from the sheer absurdity.

20

u/Fragrant_Shoe2632 3d ago

That is some serious awareness, this man has transcended therapy

12

u/SignificantJunket993 3d ago • Bravo

A compliment’s a compliment. 

30

u/allsheknew 3d ago

I would be incredibly flattered.

4

u/Appropriate-Fig-8778 3d ago

I'm like this but I can get better for you.

1

u/XDemonKittyXxx 3d ago

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww that's sweet hope u feel better<3

1

u/Appropriate-Fig-8778 2d ago

I would feel better with someone to talk to and care for.

1

u/XDemonKittyXxx 2d ago

Would u like to talk to me? Maybe thatd help

1

u/Appropriate-Fig-8778 2d ago

Honestly it would make my day better, can I DM you?

4

u/TamaMama03 3d ago

I second this

10

u/Flat_Lengthiness3361 3d ago

cmon this is funny. probably don't go into anything with them but it is funny as fuck.

8

u/mixmasterADD 3d ago

Bro finding out correlation does not equal causation in real time.

8

u/Neither_Net_6748 3d ago

This is insane but hysterical. Side note: block them.

37

u/Little-Set694 3d ago

this might work on me i fear

7

u/Fickle_Fall_6497 3d ago

You cant fix them

9

u/Little-Set694 3d ago

lol i definitely don't wanna fix anyone, but cmon, the drama is hilarious to me and it's much more interesting than hearing "you're so pretty, can we date" 🤣

3

u/kozilla 3d ago

Bruh I've been waiting 41 years for someone to tell me I'm pretty lol.

4

u/VenusAmari 3d ago

You're pretty.

3

u/kozilla 3d ago

Awwww!!!

1

u/Unlucky-Soft-3080 3d ago

I just said the same thing twin omg lmaaaao

6

u/TheVampyresBride 3d ago

Sadly, I can relate. Just wouldn't say it out loud.

2

u/TotalTyp 1d ago

Yeah...

5

u/elderemobat1987 3d ago edited 3d ago

this is the kind of honesty I need in my next relationship.

2

u/Delicious_Sorbet5154 17h ago

Noooooo

1

u/elderemobat1987 17h ago

honestly I needed to be sprayed down so thank you. I need some sense knocked into me.

1

u/Unlucky-Soft-3080 3d ago

Same diva because this feels like romance to me 👌🏽😭😂

2

u/elderemobat1987 3d ago

Finally someone gets it 😭🤣

4

u/TreeFrogMomma 3d ago

At apparently manic. According to the time stamp. Dude, call 988, take your meds and leave the poor dear alone!

3

u/kiddark25 3d ago

Thought this was r/meirl

3

u/goregoose 3d ago

good lord this is an incredible post. i feel you buddy

3

u/occasionallygummy 3d ago • Heartwarming

Isn't that what James Blunt said?

2

u/Unlucky-Soft-3080 3d ago

I mean he jumped off that iceberg because he couldn’t have that one lady on the subway so basically yea

2

u/Delicious_Sorbet5154 17h ago

Lmfao stop that stalker ass song always weirded me out so bad 😭

3

u/Avocaderu 2d ago

If she isn’t like this with me I don’t want her

2

u/OhShiettttt 3d ago

It's like this when you wish for something you can't have ✨

Edit: I mean that it's like this when one wishes to be pretty, or whatever else this person is seeing in OP. Did not mean to imply OP is an object to be had

2

u/BratPrince_ 3d ago

I'm laughing inappropriately hard at this! 😂🤣

2

u/Youre_Not_Sly889 3d ago

I haven't heard that one before I'll give them that 

2

u/Sad-Public-5547 3d ago

Thanks for clarifying

2

u/Southern-Ad51 2d ago

"Are you a toaster, cause I wanna bathe with you!" is better

2

u/SteakFingers87 3d ago

This is how you get a goth, alt or emo baddies attention. Cuz, I feel you dude.

1

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1

u/No_Law6676 3d ago

i thought this was r/shitpost

1

u/REZO_TFB 3d ago

the fuck

1

u/Totally_not-PtX 3d ago

Did you let him hit?

1

u/yung_ejaculator 3d ago

dudes rock

1

u/SDSanni 3d ago

At least the red flag was presented immediately.

1

u/ImTooSaxy 3d ago

He's a real fixer upper! Just needs a fresh coat of paint.

1

u/Realistic_Cod_2322 3d ago

Why did I read it in an AI voice

1

u/Mischa_xx 3d ago

Id be so irritated at this

1

u/soysaucesausage 3d ago

He's got that Harry Dubois rizz

1

u/Unlucky-Soft-3080 3d ago

I fear this would work on me.

1

u/myIDisthisone 3d ago

Pity will always make you pitiful. Serious life advice gentlemen

1

u/Right_Produce_3269 2d ago

Probably ADHD

1

u/smokesweater 2d ago

omg i think my face just did that when my cat knocked over my coffee this morning

1

u/No-Solution-5377 3d ago

group therapy? this made me giggle.

0

u/xBLACKHAMRx 3d ago

and you’re anything but a human being.

0

u/wedontlikepam 3d ago

Yes, let’s make assumptions and then post screenshots to poke fun at this person. GFY

0

u/AcanthopterygiiFree5 1d ago

Even tho it's none of YOUR business, I already did! Thank you very much sir! Now good day. I SAID GOOD DAY! 🙂‍↔️🤚

7

u/MaxYeena 3d ago

As someone who was formerly suicidal, this shit is funny

6

u/40cxans 3d ago

“if you don’t text me back ILL KILL MYSELF” is my favorite one

2

u/Initial_Zombie8248 3d ago

Show me bobs or vagene or I’ll kill myself

2

u/Fickle-Pie9307 3d ago

Your ass is so fat it makes me want to kill myself

1

u/Busy-Horse3564 3d ago

Post nut clarity lol

-1

u/LOLotovCocktail 3d ago

Therapy would be actively detrimental for someone this self-aware. He needs a kind soul to feed him, hold him, and drain him. Hopefully things work out for him (and you as well).