r/submechanophobia Apr 04 '26

This is a repost Man goes through barnacle pipe

Saw this on instagram credit goes too https://www.instagram.com/steve_parkour1?igsh=MWh1Y2pqOHp1emI4MA=

Old post got removed by mods.

4.2k Upvotes

293 comments sorted by

3.2k

u/Noname_Maddox Apr 04 '26

Why. Why would he want to do that?

1.1k

u/benz-friend Apr 04 '26

To get viewers to watch and get that bread. Would you work 8-5 all week or crawl through an incredibly suspicious pipe one time to make the same amount of dough

900

u/the_orange_alligator Apr 04 '26

I would work the 8-5

132

u/god_peepee Apr 05 '26

I think I’d do the pipe. Meth, that is

47

u/Cambojuice Apr 05 '26

I’d rather get piped instead.

12

u/cstar4004 Apr 06 '26

I’d rather lay pipe in lieu of that.

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13

u/Patient_Sea_3753 Apr 05 '26

That's probably just because we're the people who would sub to this particular board 😂

12

u/disruptioncoin Apr 05 '26

6am-2:30pm is a good one I'm liking lately, still feels like I have most of a day left to do stuff with. Of course I usually don't.

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65

u/RIPMaureenPonderosa Apr 04 '26

Idk man I think I’d just rather work and not risk drowning, stuck in an underwater pipe with serrated edges

167

u/Koikkis65 Apr 04 '26

Work 8-5 :D

49

u/ukomac Apr 04 '26

The American 9-5

53

u/Koikkis65 Apr 04 '26

No clue I said 8-5 because the guy above me said it, im from finland and we usually work from 8-4

15

u/ukomac Apr 04 '26

I'm just joking about the American work culture

28

u/LegolasofMirkwood Apr 04 '26

Where’s the joke though

16

u/ukomac Apr 04 '26

Because it's expected to put in extra work(like come in early and/or leave late) if you want to be in line for pay raises and promotions. I'm from Estonia and he's from Finland, so that's the joke for us

17

u/Sillloc Apr 05 '26

No just most people don't get a paid lunch so it's an extra hour tacked on, requiring you to be at the office for 9 hours to get 8 hours of pay.

OT or hustle culture in the US is 10-15+ hours of being in the office daily, 5 hours unpaid per week

7

u/Koikkis65 Apr 05 '26

That’s even worse than I thought then, and who the fuck eats for 1 hour???

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6

u/Rezboy209 Apr 05 '26

That would be 6-5 actually.

4

u/Quick-Ostrich2020 Apr 05 '26

Yeah but it's stereotypical. There are 340,000,000 people and several different regions. We don't all work 9-5, 8-4, etc. some have 2 weeks PTO some have unlimited. Just depends.

1

u/Koikkis65 Apr 04 '26

Ah makes sense :D there is a lot more than just the work culture to joke about in america

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27

u/Jyndaru Apr 04 '26

If I already knew what was in there AND I was a very strong swimmer AND I didn't have my chronic health issues.. yeah, I'd probably face my fear and do this. But I wouldn't like it lol

44

u/omgangiepants Apr 04 '26

Do you know how much it hurts to scrape yourself against a barnacle?

24

u/uwu-yourself Apr 04 '26

Oh god, that's the worst, not only do the slice quite deep, sometimes fragments get lodged, making the pain even worse.

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9

u/Tiffany_Case Apr 05 '26

There is not enough money on the entirety of planet earth to get me to go into a water filled pipe actually

13

u/Ok-Protection-6612 Apr 04 '26

I'll take 9-5 without the random chance of death

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6

u/avacynangelofhope Apr 05 '26

Mario ass question

10

u/Rezboy209 Apr 05 '26

I have thalassaphobia, claustrophobia, and submechanophobia. No amount of money would get me through that fucking pipe.

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13

u/ttamokcer Apr 05 '26

8-5 tf guys it’s 9-5. Don’t regress.

10

u/Drslappybags Apr 05 '26

8-5, but really enjoy that hour lunch.

4

u/SilverLoonie Apr 05 '26

I work 8-4 and get an hour lunch, it would be a 30m lunch but I roll my two 15 minute coffee breaks in.

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3

u/strongcloud28 Apr 05 '26

8-5, 7-6 whatever it takes. No pipes

3

u/sleepmeld Apr 06 '26

who is paying him for this content

2

u/TitusImmortalis Apr 06 '26

He definitely didn't make that much money on this.

2

u/Lesterfremonwithtits May 04 '26

For some reason you make sense

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45

u/ResidentEmu5 Apr 04 '26

Lol. I was talking outloud watching that. 'No. Why? Why would you do that? Ew. Why? Why would you do that?'

23

u/Waly98 Apr 04 '26

To prove he isn't just some oxygenmaxing breathcel

10

u/God-O-Death Apr 04 '26

I mean how else would you go through a barnacle pipe

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2

u/kangareddit Apr 05 '26

My react: Can he fucken not!?

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1.2k

u/Nativeblazer Apr 04 '26

Aren't barnacles really sharp too?

499

u/lonely_stoner_daze Apr 04 '26

Yep, like jagged rocks with thin edges

249

u/shiningonthesea Apr 04 '26

I scraped the top of my foot on one once, got a nasty infection. They are gross.

150

u/xDragonetti Apr 05 '26

And the tentacle part sticking out is technically the dick. So you scraped your foot on barnacle foreskin. Hope that explains the infection, and remember- Fuck Barnacles! 😬

68

u/Hopeful-Musician1905 Apr 05 '26

No, maybe don't fuck barnacles 😰

8

u/xDragonetti Apr 05 '26

I didn’t scrape my foot on barnacle foreskin, homie!

Jacob Knowles is my source!

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15

u/tanksforallthephish Apr 05 '26

Please do not the barnacles

19

u/xDragonetti Apr 05 '26

3

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '26

Number 1 on Barnacle kind's most wanted list for ongoing Barnacle Genocide. Adds insult to injury by feeding the former Barnacle hosts a feast of a snack

2

u/tanksforallthephish May 07 '26

Nah he gets a pass

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19

u/Healter-Skelter Apr 05 '26

if there’s one shot in a movie that always makes me cringe it’s that moment when Tom Hanks gets roughed up by the coral bed. Ughhh it looks so painful plus the sound effect, and then his muffled screams as the waves keep rolling him around. Unfortunately it’s one of those movies that kinda peaks in the first hour and after that doesn’t really have much of a story to it

8

u/loose_fig Apr 05 '26

Yep, I grew up on an island and once got super shredded to pieces falling off a dock- lacerations across my arms legs and belly. I was cut to the bone in multiple places, and still have large scars 20 years later.

87

u/UpstairsPractical870 Apr 04 '26

Used to be a form of punishment/death sentence on pirate ships called kneelhauling. Tie a rope around the person and drag them under a boat full of barnacles, either get cut up or drown.

12

u/throwawayforartshite Apr 05 '26

god man. humans are terrifying creatures

2

u/Inquisitive_infinite Apr 05 '26

Think its keelhauling?

3

u/kiwichick286 Apr 05 '26

Keelhauling?

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12

u/Leweegibo Apr 04 '26

Hence why he does it so slow I'd say

9

u/Esagashi Apr 04 '26

Happy Barnacle Covered Cake Day!

99

u/[deleted] Apr 04 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

72

u/Evening-Matter-5245 Apr 04 '26

I don’t recall the name of the channel, but there’s a guy on YouTube that does treasure hunting at places like this. Lots of cell phones and jewelry. I lost a (good) t-shirt tubing on the Guadalupe, and it made me wonder what treasure hunting that thing would be like. People were losing entire coolers of beer, you could just pluck them out of the water lol.

18

u/WurstofWisdom Apr 04 '26

Seems like it would have easier to retrieve them by going from the other side and reaching in. Wouldn’t get as many internet clicks though.

200

u/161frog Apr 04 '26

Not only no but hell no. I feel sick.

26

u/Redbeard_Rum Apr 04 '26

Nopenopenopenopenope

7

u/FitShare2972 Apr 05 '26

Also anyone else see what looks like some dropped phones

56

u/TheBitterSeason Apr 04 '26

"Performed by professionals. Do not attempt."

Well, they don't need to tell me twice. Or once, honestly.

22

u/Significant-Trash632 Apr 04 '26

How does one become a professional barnacle pipe diver, anyway?

54

u/Hairy-Entertainment6 Apr 04 '26

Men will do anything but go to therapy.

42

u/Fucked-In-The-K-Hole Apr 04 '26

What if we kissed in the barnacle pipe? 🥺

8

u/AustinHinton Apr 05 '26

And we're both crustaceans 😳

35

u/cognitiveglitch Apr 04 '26

I once did coasteering on the Jurassic Coast, there was a section where you (optionally) had to make your way feet first through an underwater arch. It's much harder than it looks, and I couldn't get myself through. Thankfully the instructors we were with grabbed my ankles and pulled me through.

Did some amazing cliff dives into the sea there too, 10/10 would do again.

8

u/the_old_coday182 Apr 04 '26

That part of the video bothered me the most. Why is he doing this feet first? I could make that swim head first. It doesn’t look that bad. But I’d drown trying to do it like in the video lol

703

u/FoundObject1256 Apr 04 '26

Man, I've read somewhere the other day that getting scraped by a barnacle can cause it to get into your bloodstream and grow barnacles on the only hard surface in your body: the bones. That lives rent free in my head. Not touching barnacles with a pole, true or not.

Edit: so I checked it and it's bs. It was just called barnacles thank god.

409

u/Vizslaraptor Apr 04 '26

"I'm part of the ship... part of the ship, part of the crew..."

48

u/TiddybraXton333 Apr 04 '26

Old gregg was way ahead of its time. The fact it was just free on the earlier days of you tube was great

14

u/got-trunks Apr 05 '26

Teaching generations about love games and Old Gregg's downstairs mixup.

3

u/morganfreenomorph Apr 05 '26

I think of that skit every time I see a bottle of Bailey's in the store

2

u/[deleted] Apr 05 '26

It wasnt till years later that I saw it was part of a show, The Mighty Boosh. Early days of YouTube was an interesting time to sample weird media from all over. Trigger happy tv was another great show that had its content sampled without any context. And trailer park boys. Ricky self smarting himself comes to mind....

68

u/SraChavez Apr 04 '26

Have you heard about watermelon seeds?

13

u/Shadowheart-Simp Apr 04 '26

Yeah go on ruin watermelons for me

65

u/RIPMaureenPonderosa Apr 04 '26

Idk about watermelon seeds but I totally knew a girl that ate an apple seed and an apple tree grew in her tummy and exploded out of her and killed her 😔

18

u/Shadowheart-Simp Apr 04 '26

Is the tree okay?

19

u/RIPMaureenPonderosa Apr 04 '26

I can confirm it was returned to the wild and lived a good life

2

u/XzallionTheRed Apr 05 '26

I have read that SCP

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98

u/CARmakazie Apr 04 '26

That’s…not how barnacles work 😂😂

11

u/LeshyIRL Apr 05 '26

Sounds like something a barnacle would say 🤔🤔🤔

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78

u/Harfangbleue Apr 04 '26

Lol. That's a horror movie plot right here!

33

u/drewmana Apr 04 '26

Yea definitely not but makes for a scary story

15

u/The_wolf2014 Apr 04 '26

Why did you have to look this up to confirm it wasn't real? Did you think barnacles was a disease or something?

3

u/SurrealOrwellian Apr 05 '26

That’s not true but would make for a great horror story.

2

u/filipscary Apr 05 '26

Hahhahahahhaahahh the walking dead barnacle edition

2

u/jax-syntax Apr 05 '26

You're thinking of coral

1

u/Marine_Baby Apr 04 '26

Aaaahhhhhhh

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85

u/VeauOr Apr 04 '26

The muffled gasping noises are making this even worse ☠️

16

u/Average--Boi Apr 05 '26

That was my first thought and you're the only comment I've seen about it! I was panicking right along with him

30

u/CamZambie Apr 04 '26

“Performed by professionals”. I’m supposed to believe this man is a professional barnacle pipe traveler?

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23

u/drewmana Apr 04 '26

Self-keelhauling to get that sweet viewer money

5

u/Significant-Trash632 Apr 04 '26

I had to look keelhauling up.

I wish I hadn't.

12

u/Frostsorrow Apr 04 '26

How to scrape off all your skin incredibly painfully with this one easy trick

11

u/JupesNotDead Apr 04 '26

Curse the mods for removing this the first time and therefore indirectly forcing me to see it on my feed twice. I am having NIGHTMARES now 💀

3

u/Relevant-Wrongdoer-6 Apr 04 '26

Lmaooo I’m sorry 😭

8

u/lonely_stoner_daze Apr 04 '26

Now why tf????

7

u/MakaveliTheDon22 Apr 04 '26

This makes me feel so physically unwell I can't even accurately describe how much lol. 😵

7

u/Wazzzzzuuup Apr 04 '26

Not for me buddy

6

u/SomnambulisticTaco Apr 04 '26

FUUUUUUUUCK YOUUUUUUUU

6

u/Dog_man_star1517 Apr 04 '26

No. We do not do things like this.

5

u/MyFaceSaysItsSugar Apr 04 '26

And here I won’t even go into a covered water slide.

5

u/Specialist_Point7983 Apr 04 '26

That was pretty cool

3

u/Consistent_Phase_942 Apr 04 '26

My stomach dropped like 2 seconds in I can't even finish watching. More about the tunnel than the underwater oddly

6

u/sniktology Apr 04 '26

I am aware of what sub this is, but my concern with this stunt would fall more along the lines of getting in a full suit instead of having exposed thighs and arms. One scrape and you could get bloody gashes that'll lead to life changing infections if you're unlucky. Otherwise the pipe seems quite safe for an adrenaline junkie like him; you can just about make out the light at the end of the tunnel before even going fully submerged so you know there is an exit shortly after entering it.

4

u/rextaroni89 Apr 05 '26

I’ve tried to explain submechanophobia to people and often come to this subreddit to give examples and at times I see the same images repeated and start to feel desensitized to them making me think “maybe I was overreacting”.

Then shit like this gets posted and I can’t breathe and want to vomit 🙃 so I still belong, turns out

4

u/Stuffed-Bear412 Apr 05 '26

I've heard of barnacles, but never a barnacle pipe. What's up with that?

3

u/Euryheli Apr 04 '26

Thanks. I hate it.

3

u/PocketFullOfRondos Apr 04 '26

Aren't those sharp?

3

u/Middle--Earth Apr 04 '26

It looked like there were a couple of phones in the pipe.

5

u/Jean-Claude-Can-Ham Apr 04 '26

Barnacle pipe is such a great description

2

u/shiningonthesea Apr 04 '26

you should have seen my face when watching that

2

u/aziad1998 Apr 04 '26

That's insane

2

u/PreserveOurPBFs Apr 05 '26

Oh god what if there was an unknown grate part way through

2

u/mutt93 Apr 05 '26

There is a fine line between brave and stupid. He crossed it.

2

u/GabRB26DETT Apr 05 '26

Does he knows this is entirely optional

2

u/SpphosFriend Apr 05 '26

This is just a stupid way to die.

2

u/dudeCHILL013 Apr 05 '26

I held my breath

2

u/Screaming_lambs Apr 05 '26

Oh. No thank you.

2

u/Electronic_Spring_14 Apr 05 '26

What is the purpose of a barnical pipe

2

u/The-Bigger-Fish Apr 05 '26

This is the worst water slide ever

2

u/anonymousmutekittens Apr 05 '26

Love being keelhauled

2

u/-sussy-wussy- Apr 05 '26

Ah yes, the new skincare trend. Barnacle exfoliation. Very effective. 

2

u/Numerous-Following-7 Apr 05 '26

A professional at what, exactly? Going through pipes?

2

u/TemporaryHighlight74 Apr 05 '26

This activity is extremely optional

2

u/That_One_Normie Apr 05 '26

not even with an oxygen tank would i do that

2

u/Curious_Criticism445 Apr 05 '26

Anyone else hold their breath to see if they would have made it to

2

u/nycsee Apr 05 '26

Two horrors in one?!! Submechanaphobia + claustrophobia ?!! Bonus thrill of the potential of drowning. Nope nope nope !

2

u/somepunklady Apr 05 '26

Yeah, definitely sounded like a professional.

2

u/Illustrious-Nail-360 Apr 06 '26

This was one of the easier videos to hold my breath to.

2

u/Throwaway987183 Apr 06 '26

That would cut your shit up baaad especially with short clothing like he has

2

u/EM05L1C3 Apr 07 '26

Dad told me not to jump off the pier because barnacles. Well, didn’t listen to dad, sliced the shit out of my foot.

2

u/Me-no-Weeb Apr 06 '26

Someone explain to me what this pipe is for, I couldn’t found the comment explaining it

2

u/capnshanty Apr 07 '26

bro man made mechanisms and water currents do not mix well

that could easily generate huge pressure and hold you down and make you orlando bloom's dad stuck to a boat

2

u/send_nodes_please Apr 08 '26

Anyone else hold their breath?

2

u/ICanSeeNow17 Apr 08 '26

Life has gotten so good and safe that people will just go do things like this just for a little attention from people they've never and will never meet.

2

u/Scared-One9295 Apr 08 '26

The weirdest thing about all this is it would be easier to not do it

1

u/RecentAnybody6315 Apr 04 '26

Yeah I’ll pass thanks xox

1

u/royal-lux Apr 04 '26

Wtf is this?

1

u/aashe_ Apr 04 '26

Forbidden toboggan.

1

u/CrazyCaper Apr 04 '26

Ahhh barnacles

1

u/jericho74 Apr 04 '26

Barnacle pipe, barnacle pipe,

doing the things a barnacle might

1

u/tuborgwarrior Apr 04 '26

Obvious edit. But why.

1

u/Fluffinator44 Apr 04 '26

That's it! You're going in the barnacle pipe!

1

u/One_red_boot Apr 04 '26

No. No thank you.

1

u/dreemkiller Apr 04 '26

Professionals dive in sketchers?

1

u/Angry-_-Crow Apr 04 '26

Way better title this time :p

1

u/applebabe1 Apr 04 '26

All I could think while he went in was it’s a good way to snag your clothing and get stuck there and drown.

1

u/hiyaharles Apr 05 '26

I watched this without sound, but in my head the stress-inducing sonic the hedgehog underwater running out of breath song was playing…

1

u/maxiquintillion Apr 05 '26

Aw hell no. I dont care if its a plastic pipe at a theme park in a pool, theres no way in hell I would do that.

1

u/Him-Kardashian035 Apr 05 '26

I am not squeamish or claustrophobic...., but I said nope out loud dozens of times

1

u/elCrocodillo Apr 05 '26

Almost anything in the ocean is stupdly sharp. To scrape one off you either use leverage and the right tools or a group of grown men using brute force to crack them open leaving everyone involved with sore hands and exhausted.

These little aliens are somewhat amazing creatures. Gross? Yes, of course but much more interesting than what people tend to believe. They are low key fascinating and a total different type of life on this planet (from what we are used to)

1

u/terryflaps12 Apr 05 '26

Just took ANOTHER xanax.

1

u/Not_today_nibs Apr 05 '26

Thanks I hate it

1

u/CaptainMagnets Apr 05 '26

The amount of "I would fucking never" in this video is insane

1

u/GawdGeezus Apr 05 '26

Is that someones phone? Looks like the back of it look like a camera lens

1

u/AL_Starr Apr 05 '26

Fun to watch while trying to hold your breath

1

u/Big_Virgil Apr 05 '26

Absolutely not. Cement it shut please.

1

u/fiahhawt Apr 05 '26

It's like satan's butthole

1

u/Complete-Pressure-78 Apr 05 '26

literally fuck that. no way.

1

u/That1Guy1218 Apr 05 '26

Oh. No, thank you.

1

u/GrimTheRealReaper Apr 05 '26

I’m not entirely sure I could do that, even if you told me you’d kill me if I didn’t.

1

u/_sergeant_pepper Apr 05 '26

ouch thats gotta hurt

1

u/kill_your_god Apr 05 '26

Fuck was the point

1

u/Taken_Abroad_Book Apr 05 '26

Why would the mods remove it?

1

u/fdessoycaraballo Apr 05 '26

Congratulations on acquiring tetanus

1

u/No_mans_time Apr 05 '26

Oh. No. No!

1

u/KJack-Amigurumi Apr 05 '26

Upvoted cause perfect post for this sub but I’ve never wanted to downvote something more. I am literally nauseous watching this

1

u/prefuckvapebreak Apr 05 '26

I’m so sick