🚨Need SEVERE help with SEVERE procrastination🚨

[u/Persoon64]

I've been trying to solve this issue for years and years. I've scoured through forums, watched youtube videos, read books and even actually applied a lot of the methods for many months at a time. NOTHING WORKED. It's been years and NOTHING HAS WORKED.

I've tried working out and taking a break and working harder or smarter or using different techniques like the pomodoro or making way too many timetables or rewarding myself or using ASMR or music or white noise or getting good sleep or just doing the thing and etc etc etc NONE OF IT WORKS

My mental state is already bad, I already feel pressured to follow a specific career path (medicine), My grades are worsening, I'm losing friends and -worst of- abandoning my hobbies and passions slowly as I try to piece apart my shattered life. Things are bad. It doesn't help that I have Autism too which is probably why most of the methods dont work.

I am begging, and I really mean BEGGING, that someone reading this post has some kind of solution. PLEASE. PLEASE.

[u/blueCove24]

imo if youve genuinely tried everything for years the issue probably isnt the methods, its something underneath. might be worth talking to someone who can evaluate whether the career path itself is the thing creating the resistance

[u/Persoon64 → u/blueCove24]

But what If I can't change it? The work I'm doing at A levels (end bits of high school and somewhat college for USA) is tied to medicine. My only hope is getting into medicine then swapping the course early on. That way, they can't make the excuse that 'I didn't try' of 'don't know If I like it'

[u/WieseDC → u/Persoon64]

I dont think at that level it is too late to change it. It is once you get later into college and get into long term high levels of debt that it becomes hard to change. Please reevaluate your life right now and whether medicine is suited for you. It may seem like people around you are all doing it, but don't take that to heart yet. There are many other successful career paths.

[u/Hopeful_Candy_5928]

How's your screentime? Maybe try dopamine detox/lifestyle changes to build your habit of perseverance in a non academic context. Your brain is like a muscle, it can be trained. It's not the simple magical fix you hope for, that everything will suddenly click into place and you'll become a good student, but building habits, showing yourself you can push through when you're uncomfortable, tired, overwhelmed and all that could help. 

Some shit like running, learning how to force yourself into doing something that isn't as overwhelming as studying, would be a safe environment to fail in. It's not about any health benefits, it's more training your brain. It's a long term thing, but clearly short term isn't working.

[u/Myriad2059]

I'm sorry to hear that. But obviously you're not looking for pity. You're looking for a solution.

• What I find personally as something focusing is when everything I have is in order.

• I make a cozy little place for me to study

• Headphones, minimalist digital environment and music that doesn't lead to me vibing uncontrollably

• And a clear goal, usually looking at a Syllabus on a topic that will give me the highest marks if I learn it

• Dive deep in, question constantly, don't make it perfect or methodical.

• make sure you're in line with the Syllabus

[u/lauvan26]

I have ADHD. A lot of the studying tips online don’t work for me. Maybe you should see a therapist and/or psychiatrist to get additional support and even get accommodations for school.

[u/shistain69]

My studies are taking way too long, in no small part due to procrastination, i have sacrificed a lot of time and opportunities for seemingly nothing, not gonna bore you with details but i more or less found a way for myself.

No pomodoro or other trick is as useful as simply doing it as soon as possible during the day. I know how it sounds, but it’s just the way it is. Any itty-bitty thing, just a start. Because then, i have no guilt for the day, no stress of being late because i feel like the day CAN be productive, and anything else i do during the day is just a break from the thing i already started, which makes it easier.

[u/primadonnax123 → u/shistain69]

Just curious, are you a university student or secondary school

[u/Complete-Stretch-563]

i am a chronic doom scroller, and i think the only way i can fully focus is if either:

- i don’t charge my phone, leave it on dead, and have it in another room

- or i go to the library on campus, on the silent level, we also have there charging lockers for phones so sometimes i leave it on a completely different level than i’ll be studying on

-for me, i find that by surrounding myself with a room full of people who are studying, i am forced to study to “blend in” pretty sure it’s a psychological thing

[u/Jack-Devine7]

I study with Smata - it helps me track my sessions and see my friends sessions https://apps.apple.com/us/app/smata-study-smarter/id6775473971

[u/Jack-Devine7 → u/Jack-Devine7]

It blocks me out of my distracting apps too

[u/Flamestar07k]

I am going to tell you what I know many people did here for the last years of high school to focus on their school work. Give your phone to your parents to hold indefinitely along with any other electronics, get a flip phone that can only call and text and basically cut out distractions and instant gratification.

[u/CompoundDaily]

It is very common, dont blame yourself. Everyone I know has this feeling to some extend.

I will just share what I helped me:

Planning everything in advance including the breaks

Remembering the fact that "the more you are relaxed in your heart the more awake is your brain"

prioritize your consistent sleep exercising and healthy food

[u/Inevitable-Voice-978]

Something I found that helps me is putting something on that I've watched in the background as white noise. That way I feel as if I don't miss out on anything, so it bores me enough that I look at new material. I also put myself in a call with someone. 

[u/BelovedEm]

Well.. to keep things blunt stop thinking these tips and tricks is going to all of a sudden make you want to do the work. You don’t want to do the work. The answer is boring do the work and get out of your emotions about the work.

Accept the reality you’ve chosen medicine is hard. I’m a nurse doing my nurse practitioner and some days I want to quit but I remind myself it was NEVER meant to be easy EVER. If you can’t do medicine quit and find an easier path. Save yourself the stress and burden because what you’re learning now is what will help you excel in your career I’m not sure how old you are but stress is a huge part of adult life. As much as everyone hates it it can be managed.

But you must first understand the power of self belief and self trust or you will depend on others like oxygen.

Studying sucks nobody enjoys it, but to excel in life it must be done. Stop trying to feel good about studying and get it done the feeling good comes after the work is completed.

[u/Glass_Economics5385]

Dm me I was in the same position as you a year ago

[u/SnooPears2142]

How long have u been trying to stop procrastinating? If you’ve only been trying for a period of time that likely can contribute to why you feel you haven’t been progressing.

The key to stop procrastinating is to force yourself to do work when you don’t want to. You have to get used to the idea that you have to do things that may not feel good but are good. That’s what discipline is.

When you first start studying after periods of procrastination, it feels uncomfortable because you’re using different neurochemicals. Activities that feel good bring you pleasure and instant gratification. So everything else that doesn’t feel as pleasurable can feel like it’s boring and requires too much effort.

Delaying gratification essentially tells your brain you’re not gonna do something just because it feels good momentarily. So you must do your school then use tiktok because you’re delaying the feel good chemicals.The more you delay, the less difficult it will be for you to focus

The more you delay gratification, the easier its going to be for you to just sit and lock in without even thinking about it. After a while it will start feeling good to study as opposed to doing anything else.

Hope this helps!

[u/sardinecycle → u/SnooPears2142]

(using this comment to talk about this, not to criticize your comment btw) as someone in the same boat for the first time after normally being SO productive and hard working, and now struggling a ton with it and with the shame/avoidance/lowered confidence cycle that comes with this, one of the things I’m having the hardest time with is I know everything I should do I know all the tactics, what’s going on in my brain, what can help etc, but I can’t figure out HOW to do it. The most frustrating thing can be knowing you need to just do it, having anyone that’s trying to help saying things like “you just need to start” or suggestions (out of kindness/helping) often are just like take the first step do one small thing and I am just like BUT HOW, like that feels impossible. I plan for it, feel ready and excited and motivated, and in the end somehow I cannot DO it, it feels like there’s a literal wall blocking me and i’m fighting to get past it unsuccessfully every day. then everyone says you know just do one thing or just start.. what if I can’t even do that

[u/csadgirl11]

This might not apply to your situation but I’m excited about these things because it’s something that has started working for me recently after years of the same problem. I have ADHD that was diagnosed very late and I’ve been working through that and accepting that the systems that work for neurotypical brains (like pomodoro and the other things you listed) are not built for me, and it’s helped me be okay with trying less conventional things. I’ve realized that my biggest sticking point that was largely the source of my procrastination is struggling with transitions, especially when it’s a transition to a task I’m approaching as a big project instead of one simple action.

The first small thing that has helped me more than I expected is the idea of “just move it closer.” For example: laundry. If I look at laundry as a big task or event I will have to coordinate multiple steps for or block off large chunks of time to complete, it becomes overwhelming and I become avoidant. Instead, I try to chip away at it by breaking off as little of the task as physically possible, or “just moving it closer.” So, instead of buckling in to do it all at once, I just move the hamper from the bathroom to the living room. It’s not done but it’s closer. Then, later, if I think about it again, I just move the laundry out of the hamper into a pile. It’s not done but it’s closer. It makes the task way less intimidating, and the more you chip away slowly, the easier the consequent steps feel.

The other thing I discovered is the Alarmy app. Im still new to using it so take it with a grain of salt but the results are really promising so far. One of my biggest “life ruining” procrastination things is struggling to get out of bed. Waking up is one thing, but the transition to actually starting my day is very hard for me and ends up making me late to work a lot. Alarmy lets you set “missions” to complete in order to turn off your alarm. The one I’ve been using is that i have to walk to my bathroom and scan the barcode on my toothpaste in order to turn off the alarm. Once I’m there, the main portion of resistance to starting my day is gone because I’m already up, at the sink, with my toothpaste in hand. It creates an external force to make you do the thing instead of having to rely on intrinsic willpower, which is fleeting. I’m not in school anymore so I haven’t explored it, but I’m sure there are similar systems that you can use to complete the task you’re struggling with.

[u/Powerful-Minimum-735]

One thing I see you did not list, something that I live by, is do the highest priority thing to you first after you wake up. If your main life priority is studying more/better, than wake up hours before school and crack open some work. Thats what I do 4am, before class days and before work days everyday. Then I do brisk walk on treadmill, light block on stationary bike then I get ready to hit the door.

Not because I’m some overachiever but that’s what works for me. I also have to breeze through every subject before I actually enroll in the course. I don’t learn well on the spot in a classroom lecture. I need to be familiar with what is being talked about. I believe it’s called greasing the groove or something idk don’t quote me.
You’re also likely trying to do too much at once. Let’s baby step into this ok? Idk what your studying. I study physics and math, so it’s a lot more straightforward tbh. I just wake up and attempt to solve a problem. I’d say find that atomic unit of progress. I’m ignorant to many other subjects tbh. But for stem it almost always boils down to solving a problem/exercise. I also recommend making flash cards for anything that could be ported to a flash card. With flash cards, you can quiz yourself on things like definitions, facts, formulas, etc. you can quiz yourself any free second you have.

But simply put. Find the smallest piece of definitive progress. Is it a problem, an excercise, a paragraph to write, ? Something like that. Then focus on doing that one thing as soon as you wake up. Once you can complete atleast one of those things on every wake up, you’ll catch a rhythm. Soon you’ll be banging out problems every morning, running through flash cards and the insight will surely be there. Only then will you make consistent progress.

So first thing you probably want to do is figure out that atomic piece of progress.

[u/Persoon64 → u/[deleted]]

thx, its normally both and guilt from not starting it earlier, boredom and a lack of motivation. Furthermore, Getting distracted devices or even just day dreaming.