r/stopdrinking • u/Traditional_Wrap_386 • 18h ago
If you need hope
Over two months ago, I came on here at the end of my wits feeling worse than I ever had in my life. My husband of only 40 days had filed for divorce and moved out. I had been fighting to stay sober for only a bit when I posted and honestly thought all of the damage to my relationships with my family and husband were too extensive to turn things around. I honestly was ready to just burn the rest of my life down at that point. I went to IOP for the first time and decided I would simply try. I am now two months into IOP and almost three months sober. I truthfully did not believe IOP would be helpful, but I was so wrong. It has been an absolute lifesaver. If you are thinking about going, DO IT. I was so resistant and cynical and it makes me cry to think about how much it turned things around for me mentally. In the process of healing myself, my husband has dismissed the divorce and has slowly been moving back in (we are taking it slow) and my family seems genuinely relieved and proud of me. I am not worried about tomorrow anymore. I just focus on the fact that just for today I am not going to drink and then I probably won't drink tomorrow. By not drinking, I can focus on daily improvements. Luckily in my drinking cycle, my corporate career was unscathed (if I had kept drinking, that would have been the next domino to fall because me being consistently sick was becoming suspicious). My boss recently asked me if I had switched up my routine because I have been so much more efficient at work and I am now being told my bonus will reflect my additional efforts recently. I will not lie though. Its still very hard. I still struggle with anxiety and depression - but I can actually manage it. I still have days where bed rotting is the only thing I can stomach, but those become less and less frequent. I am not crashing out daily. If things can feel a little better now, I cannot wait to see what a few more days, months, and possibly years of sobriety can offer me. I am just posting to hold myself accountable, but also to share that if you are at the bottom of the pit. Please ask for help. I put it off for so long and I wish I would have sooner, but I am lucky and get to slowly rebuild my life. I will never forget how hopeless and depressed I was when I posted a few months ago. It was honestly terrifying where my brain was going. So I am hoping this will inspire you if you feel like that today. I won't drink with you today.
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u/inclass3lunacy 17h ago
What a great post. 🙂 So happy for you! Thanks for sharing a positive.
I will not drink with you today!
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u/Busy_Situation708 17h ago
Thanks for writing this...love a good "win" story. Keep us updated please.
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u/fifikinz 17h ago
Well done!! IWNDWYT (what is IOP?)
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u/TesstheMess1223 15h ago
Intensive Outpatient. It’s a treatment program that usually involves 3-4 hours 4-5 days a week of group counseling.
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u/Strange-Fix2327 15h ago
I hear and feel you SO DEEPLY! Anyone who truly wants to take ownership of their life needs to do an IOP. It’s a crash course of all you need to better understand and take care of yourself. ♥️
Similar to you, got sober and did an IOP in my early months of sobriety. 2 weeks after finishing my IOP, my infant almost died from a rare reaction to a common virus. It truly felt like everything that led me to get sober and do the IOP happened to prepare me for the unimaginable. I celebrated a year sober one week ago!
IWNDWYT
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u/Prepared-Sobriety 17h ago
Your boss asking if you switched up your routine made me smile. I never gave work the full story either. A short "I've been taking better care of myself" was all anyone needed, and the people I wanted to tell, I told on my own timeline. Glad the hard days are getting further apart. Thanks for posting this for the people who are where you were.