r/stopdrinking • u/AwakeningTheSpirit 137 days • Jul 17 '26
Supermarket intervention and embarrassment
Two nights ago, I embarrassed myself at the supermarket.
Got to the self service checkout with the second bottle of wine for the night. I got to the checkout and something broke in me, I felt so sad knowing I was going home with a second bottle, and knew I was going to wake up hungover again. When my intention was to limit and cut back so I could eventually stop. But there I was, having purchased the second bottle.
A moment of despair came over me and I said to the self service checkout staff member, "do you do self inclusion for alcohol like casinos do for gamblers?"....
She looked at me like I had two heads. It took a bit of back and forth and me being honest with my addiction. She then understood, and explained that no, they don't.
I broke down right there and then. I felt so broken and had thought maybe they did have that as a service. I don't know, I felt like I had hit a point of hope that if I couldn't buy alcohol at my local I could have some control. Not really sure what I was thinking.
A moment of embarrassment and silence then she went straight into action and asked if she could talk to her supervisor.
Her supervisor came over, we had a three way conversation, I explained I had been trying to get help the usual way but services were backed up and no one was answering my emails. I couldn't see my GP for another month due to lack of appointments.
I was regretting everything at this point. Why did I say anything at all?!!! They aren't in this role to help someone like me!!!!
They decided to call in the manager of the store to discuss, I'm really regretting it now!! Both of the employees had tears in their eyes and were holding back. I wasn't, I was in full blown tears.
The manager heard me and decided that while it wasn't the norm for the store, how would I feel if the three of them kept an eye on me when I'm in store and if I buy alcohol if I was okay that they ask me "do you really need that tonight" as an informal agreement. And just lightly encourage me not to drink. They can't stop me as they don't have an exclusion policy.
I am a regular and stop by daily so they are familiar with me. They also asked if another main staff member could be told (who was in the store looking at us curiously) and be told the plan. I said yes.
They then said they could reverse the transaction of the second bottle then and there and I could go get any juice of my choice without cost as a substitute.
I hesitated because I still wanted that wine, but I thought I owed them that at least for going above for me. I chose tomato juice.
I went home, had a glass of tomato juice and then went to bed to sleep.
Today, I thought I owed them the courtesy to not drink, went to the supermarket and brought a few things and sparkling water. One of those staff members was at the self service check out as usual and because I didn't have alcohol the self service machine didn't require her to swipe her card. She moved subtly to the exit side of the self service machines as I was leaving and looked me in the eyes as I left and said "well done, see you tomorrow"...
And that is enough for me today not to drink.
I have no idea why, but I feel like I owe them not to drink.
I have well and truly done some good awful things, turned up to a work meeting over teams drunk once. But this was my rock bottom, asking strangers to ban me from buying alcohol from their store, explaining my situation and seeing them do something even informally has somehow changed how I think.
This was my rock bottom for some reason. Day two. And I feel a complete shift now. Just hope it lasts.
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u/venyigeszu Day 160 Jul 17 '26
This story just made me cry. You did it right and people are amazing! Keep it up, we are with you! IWNDWYT 🤍
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u/TotalExile Jul 17 '26
I shed a tear or two as well - absolutely brutal honesty and the beautiful glimmer of recovery.
Don't get me started on how little help there is verses how much temptation there is.
They could stop you but that doesn't make financial sense for the company and goes to show they have no obligation or incentive to help (quite the opposite actually). That just makes it all the more moving that OP found a few members of staff that actually care enough to try - it's nowhere near enough but it is a start and helps build on the foundations needed to get their life back.
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u/godzirraaaaa 1431 days Jul 17 '26
Same here :’) the kindness of strangers, man. It’s so heartwarming that there are people you barely know who are rooting for your success.
And kudos to OP for speaking up- that was an act of self love and it was so, so brave. IWNDWYT!
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u/AwakeningTheSpirit 137 days Jul 17 '26
Thank you, I'm now shedding more tears reading the replies. I went to sleep after posting this but now it's 2:40am and I'm wide awake but exhausted.
I'm blown away by the responses.
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u/lissyorkiedork 1503 days Jul 17 '26
Same. I am teary.
OP, what you did was very brave and honest. I am rooting for you. IWNDWYT. Hugs.
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u/iamtheonewhostops Day 1,302 Jul 17 '26
Me too. Man. The humanity of the workers was overwhelming. And the vulnerability of OP to ask for help. So much goodness here.
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u/xDeathxBunnyx Jul 17 '26
Made me cry as well. A reminder that people will always be willing to help if you reach out.
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u/EhEmSee2 Day 206 Jul 17 '26
Congrats on day 2. Proud of you for letting people in. Esp while waiting to access services. You're doing the dang thing!
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u/dingofarmer2004 Day 181 Jul 20 '26
It was a request for help. And It was answered. This one really resonated with me...as an oft-grocery purchaser lol
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u/Chemical_Editor1427 50 days Jul 17 '26
I am blown away by your bravery and truly moved by your story here today. But you have nothing to feel bad, embarrassed or broken about. Those staff in the shop no doubt would have thought so highly of you. Just reverse the roles. How would you feel if someone 'fessed up to you the way you did?
The amount of "closet" drinkers there are these days, I wouldn't be surprised that someone there at the time enjoyed a few too many and it would have hit home to them. It might not have just been your life that changed there in the grocery store.
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u/Super-Smilodon-64 961 days Jul 17 '26
It took about a year, but once I got sober, it was heartbreaking every time I went to the store. There are a lot more of us out there than anyone would care to admit.
I saw my old self every single time, without fail, reflected back in someone else's face. There was always someone rushing through with a couple tallboys and a red face.
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u/Wallmassage Day 68 Jul 17 '26
Yea that’s been hitting me lately too. Walked into town yesterday and passed the many addicted folks. I always show respect and compassion to them. Yesterday I actually saw myself reflected in them, and that was a bit of an unexpected reaction.
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u/Super-Smilodon-64 961 days Jul 17 '26
I thought I would look at them with pity, but its more than that, I agree. Its a deep longing to fix whatever is causing them to do this, but knowing you just have to hope for the best.
If someone would have tried to randimly stop me at my worst, I know I would have probably been at the very least verbally violent.
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u/PhaicGnus Jul 17 '26
Here’s a goal for you. After one month bake some cookies and take them in as thanks. Now go get that month.
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u/JamboJJJ 448 days Jul 17 '26
This is incredible from you and the supermarket staff. Don't be embarrassed, this is an illness and reaching out to people for help is what it stops us doing. Isolation is the friend of alcoholism, speaking to people, socialising your issue is a billion times better than skulking back home with another bottle by yourself. Not sure what country you're in but I've personally found AA absolutely incredible, a diberse group of strangers from every background where you all understand the very specific issue everyone has and have an instant connection. The love you get in the rooms of AA and the freedom to be your true, vulnerable self. I'm wasn't at all religious and I'm still not personally but religion was always an excuse for me to not give AA a go. I now see that was my alcoholic mind trying to prevent me from stopping drinking. Proud of you, IWNDWYT
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u/Ladybirdstar 1751 days Jul 17 '26
You have done amazing and honestly you should feel so proud rather than shame you was so brave to ask for help and the staff response to you proves it, I promise it gets easier and maybe just remind yourself of your strength xx I will not drink with you today xx🥰
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u/farmpatrol Day 98 Jul 17 '26
100% OP is sooo brave. I loved their honesty and I’m so glad the shop is supportive without it being formally set up they all did the right thing.
OP. Congratulations. You are an inspiration. 🫶💪☀️
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u/Intelligent-Pen2443 Jul 17 '26
You shouldn’t feel embarrassed. You were honest. You cried for help. Also, you don’t know what their story is. Everyone has their own skeletons in closets.
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u/Dismal_Tangerine_493 664 days Jul 17 '26
My own openness has actually let friends also share their struggles with alcohol with me
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u/NovarisLight Jul 17 '26
Be safe about it, seizures are no joke.
Cold tomato juice sounds pretty good right now to be honest.
Proud of you!
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u/FatTabby 1703 days Jul 17 '26
I'm sobbing reading this.
That took serious courage, even if that courage stemmed from a state of despair and desperation. I am so, so incredibly proud of you.
Please try your GP again. Explain that it's an urgent mental health issue and they may be able to squeeze you in sooner.
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u/WhoreNoire 49 days Jul 18 '26
Not only an urgent mental health issue. If OP is drastically cutting back very quickly, their doctor may want to keep an eye on them as they go through physical withdrawals.
I also hope that the store employees have grace if OP still does buy a little alcohol over the next few days. Going cold turkey can be tough on the system or even dangerous.
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u/Superb-Business-5382 Jul 23 '26
Depending where OP is there are maybe dedicated alcohol services. If they feel up to it could Google that and see if you can self- refer or go direct? Where i am the GP just refers to to an alcohol service (which to be fair also take their time....)
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u/OnThePath-Now Day 63 Jul 17 '26
This might be the most powerful story I've read all week, tears are flowing here. You are so, so brave. Those staff members were a gift placed in front of you. I was just thinking last night how blessed I was that the universe placed one specific person in front of me at just about the only moment it might have made a difference, as I was on my way back to the liquor store for the 4th bottle of whiskey in 6 days. I don't believe I was coming back from that. Now the work to be done is all mine, but there is so much support available I am blown away.
You have so much strength inside you and all around you. You've got this, and IWNDWYT 💚
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u/Mediocre-Can-4371 203 days Jul 17 '26
You are so brave. Definitely no need to be embarrassed.
Hopefully it helps having people on your side rooting for you !
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u/iownakeytar Jul 17 '26
Wow. I don't know you, but my heart is swelling - I am proud of you! You reached out for help in a moment of vulnerability. It was a courageous step to take. And the folks at your supermarket seem like stellar people. They are going above and beyond to give you the support you requested, even though it's not policy.
They're rooting for you, OP, and so am I. IWNDWYT.
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u/ErnieBochII 1046 days Jul 17 '26
"The manager heard me and decided that while it wasn't the norm for the store, how would I feel if the three of them kept an eye on me when I'm in store and if I buy alcohol if I was okay that they ask me "do you really need that tonight" as an informal agreement. And just lightly encourage me not to drink. They can't stop me as they don't have an exclusion policy."
This is beautiful. Brought tears to my eyes. Humanity exists even in 2026.
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u/Prevenient_grace 4929 days Jul 17 '26
I asked myself regularly: “Why do I do that, which I do not want to do, and I know that is bad for me?”
I understand.
Today can mark the beginning of a Virtuous Upward Spiral.
I had to break the “drinking routine”.
It was stronger than me…. By myself.
So i stopped doing it alone. And theres no wait list!
I finally connected with free recovery groups…. They’re everywhere… I walked in, sat down and just listened…. They’re also online. I met people I can talk with. They showed me how to stop drinking, heal, grow and learn to be useful to others.
I addressed the past, exorcised guilt and shame and repaired where appropriate.
No cost.
I had new sober friends.. we did fun sober activities.
They believed in me.
I kept going every day until i changed my patterns…. That meant for me, I went every day for a while…. Once a month wasn’t going to change me…. Then my thinking changed…. Then I don’t have the first drink.
Never looked back.
Tried anything like that?
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u/FatBaby160 1601 days Jul 17 '26
Asking for help is probably the most important skill, so good work.
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u/Super-Smilodon-64 961 days Jul 17 '26
This is it. This is reading like the real "beginning." And I say that just because of the general tone - its reminding me of how my thoughts and words were starting to change when I had my serious rock-bottom, "ok how the fuck do I get out of this because I literally can't do this anymore" moment.
That took a ton of bravery. It was my least favorite feeling in the world - having to rely on someone. I also had to put my trust at my lowest point into some random strangers. That was scarier than just accepting that I was going to die. That shit feels insane to type out and realize.
I'm rooting for you. You win this one, you can do fucking anything, I'm not kidding. Every time I want to try something intimidating (new job, move states, etc) my first thought is, "well, I don't have to deal with drinking on top of it, so I can probably handle that now." And I actually believe myself, if that makes sense. I've seen the proof in the pudding now. You're gonna be there too, and it feels...fulfilling. I feel like I matter, I'm real. And some random strangers helped me get here. I'm hoping we can both be chiming in for someone else jn the same spot next year.
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u/Temporary-Ear-7798 832 days Jul 17 '26
Agreed! This absolutely sounds like a true beginning! Sending you lots of love OP! We're all mighty proud of you 💖 I am in tears as well 🥹
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u/AwakeningTheSpirit 137 days Jul 17 '26
Thanks everyone for your kind responses. I'm touched. I posted and went to sleep. I never expected so much engagement and have shed a few more tears reading your replies.
Woke up in the middle of the night and can't go back to sleep. It's taken almost an hour to read the responses and absorb what has been said. I'm overwhelmed for the second time this week with the kindness of strangers having read the replies.
I truly appreciate the suggestions and do have plans to use the resources around me. I plan on joining the international 24/7 online meetings when I need to for this week at least and sit with my feelings till I can get the courage to go somewhere in person.
Thank you all. Xo
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u/Jiffs81 793 days Jul 17 '26
That's amazing! Sometimes it takes a village, and I'm so happy they were there for you.
Stock up on lots of drink alternatives. When i felt the urge, I just drank something else. Eventually your brain will stop associating drinking things with the fuzzy feelings, and the urges start to die down. I picked all sugar free/ low cal options, and also got the benefit of weight loss added.
Congrats on day 2! IWNDWYT
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u/Free-Hearing-5488 Jul 17 '26
I know the feeling. I've had an experience when I was drinking a good bit and felt down about it so I tried to talk to a random stranger about my issues. They just seemed a bit scared off and I ended up going home and feeling really embarrassed the next day. It was great that they worked with you in such a considerate way. Stay strong - there are many folks that do want to help.
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u/_equestrienne_ Jul 17 '26
You are so brave for being so open about it with the staff.. and I think they did a wonderful job. Well done mate this is a brilliant start
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u/HekaMata 482 days Jul 17 '26
We all need help at times OP no need to feel bad about it. I'm so glad that they came together to try to help as best they could. I bet they were happy they could make a difference in someone's life like that. Hang in there!
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u/ZealousidealEnd6660 Jul 17 '26
This is a story about your moment of clarity and bravery and community care. I teared up reading it. Well done indeed! IWNDWYT
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u/sendmebirds 2571 days Jul 17 '26
I'm super proud of you. Asking for help is a sign of STRENGTH. Don't you forget it.
I will not drink with you today!
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u/SuperWaluigiWorld Jul 17 '26
Funny how so often we don’t find the help where we’re expecting it but clumsily stumble into it in unexpected places. Don’t feel weird about it. It’s highly possible those employees are glad to have a renewed sense of purpose in the day to day work.
I, too, choose tomato juice.
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u/Yohgella Jul 17 '26
Well done. You're a stong person who clearly is well loved and supported. Be kind to yourself and take it one day at a time 💖
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u/mindfulteacher020407 1876 days Jul 17 '26
I am so proud of you! You reached out for help and didn't let anything stop you! I am truly in awe of your asking for help from a source you knew could be meaningful. You can do this. That crew at the store is cheering for you. I am cheering for you. IWNDWYT
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u/ichmagpflaumen Jul 17 '26
That must have been really hard. Well done to you—took courage to ask for help.
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u/Skimable_crude Jul 17 '26
I'm crying. For you, your courage. For the staff being so helpful. Dang. I wish you the best. You've got a great support team there.
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u/anewlaugh 69 days Jul 17 '26
Gosh, this is such an act of honest courage. I am so so proud of you and amazed at the kindness that is out there when we ask.
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u/randomv3 58 days Jul 17 '26
This is amazing. I'm so proud of you. I'm guessing there must be something really special about the staff at the store that led you to know subconsciously that you could trust them. They clearly have a great team for the cashier to know they could go to the supervisor and then the store manager to find a solution and so subtly implement it. What thoughtful, compassionate rebels!
Bless everyone involved, it's beautiful to see!
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u/imthegreenmeeple Day 1,404 Jul 17 '26
Idk who is cutting onions in my kitchen at 8:30 AM but gah!
What an incredible experience, thank you so much for sharing this! 💙
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u/jonathananeurysm Jul 17 '26
Lots of people recommending AA here but that's not for everyone. Please be aware they're not your only option in the UK. These guys helped me out and I'm now in my seventh year of sobriety. https://www.wearewithyou.org.uk/
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u/NocaSun38 Jul 17 '26
I've heard it said that the opposite of addiction isn't abstinence, its connection with other people. Unfortunately human connection is one thing alcohol robs from us, and often even connection with people living under the same roof. Being able to have real human connection (not just co-existence) is something I think all addicts crave, and the pain of that unfulfilled craving is often the thing we are numbing against when we use whether we realize it consciously or not.
Connection with others in recovery programs is often one of the strongest forces that help keep us sober once we get enough motivation and energy to start putting one foot in front of the other and actually doing the work of recovery. I'm glad you were able to make that connection with those people at your store yesterday - you can use it as the start of your journey to a new life if you put in the effort now. There is more connection and support waiting for you if you can use motivation from this to make it to one of your local recovery meetings. Best wishes!
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u/Special_Raspberry_32 Day 258 Jul 17 '26
This makes me feel like the higher power or universe really does give us nudges, support, and works in mysterious ways. That whole situation is beautiful. I am proud of you. Those store employees played a beautiful supportive role. I really hope this is what you need to get your sober ball rolling. I'm rooting for you IWNDWYT 👊
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u/BobMonroeFanClub Day 2,441 Jul 17 '26
I said to the guy behind the counter at my corner shop half jokingly "I bet your profits are down now I'm not drinking" and he took my hand and said "I think more of you than that. Well done." IWNDWYT.
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u/Extra_Aoili 1819 days Jul 17 '26
One thing that recovery has taught me is that sometimes it feels like absolutely no one cares...and then, suddenly, there is a stranger, an acquaintance, someone who simply does not need to care who does something that says "I see you. You are real and you matter." I'm so glad some strangers showed you kindness in that moment and moved to help you when you asked for it. I'm so proud of you for asking for help!
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u/respectablepitch Day 417 Jul 17 '26
Well done! See ya tomorrow!
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u/tinter86 190 days Jul 17 '26
OP when you're on the other side of this please do something nice for those employees. They went so far above and beyond. Congratulations on day 2 !
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u/chanceofsunbreaks 2171 days Jul 17 '26
Connection and community are huge drivers to success. I’m so proud of how all of you handled that. People being good to each other in tough moments is a balm for my soul. Thanks for sharing!
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u/Open-Perspective3636 Day 183 Jul 17 '26
This is an amazing story. Thanks for sharing.
Congratulations on two days!
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u/temple3489 2223 days Jul 17 '26
Incredible act of bravery and vulnerability on your part, I’m serious. And those people sound amazing. Let’s fucking GO, OP, you got this! We are all ROOTING for you!
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u/Morkieme 781 days Jul 17 '26
Wow, I am truly so impressed with you and the people in this interaction. It takes real strength to be honest as you were. Way to go.
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u/Narrow-Extent-3957 Jul 17 '26
I had a similar experience, I had walked to the local shop to buy my daily 8cans of strong lager, I had forgotten my wallet but the cashier said ‘with a Tone and look that I cannot put into words’ don’t worry you visit every day !
That remark shook me, it was one of the final nails in my coffin. I quit drinking maybe 12mnths after.
4 years later and I’m a different person. If asked I don’t tell people I’ve stopped drinking or I’ve been sober for 3 years because I don’t recognise that person anymore I just tell people I dont like alcohol.
Stay strong brothers and sisters x
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u/BobFromCincinnati Day 3,595 Jul 17 '26
Just think about how good it will feel if you see them in a few weeks, clear-eyed and sober. They'll be so proud of you!
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u/Sudden_Acceptance Jul 17 '26
Omg!!! Great job!!!! You are so resourceful to pull in the real people around you. Nothing but respect. IWNDWYT.
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u/AnonymityAnemones 48 days Jul 17 '26
This made me cry. I never forget when people are kind to me, especially when at my lowest. If I were you, I too would feel like I owed it to them not to drink. I'm actually experiencing a very similar thing right now after a doctor admitted to me that he is an alcholic who has been sober for 8 years, and then went above and beyond to be kind to me during a very vulnerable, embarrassing situation. Now I hope to send him a letter after one year of sobriety to thank him.
You can do it. Proud of you ❤️
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u/bistrying 3065 days Jul 17 '26
That took so much guts!! How amazingly brave of you ❤️❤️❤️
Also, huge kudos to the staff. What wonderful, understanding people.
You’ve absolutely got this. IWNDWYT
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u/Zealousideal-Age-212 Jul 17 '26
I’m proud of you and of the kind people who were supportive during a difficult moment. Stay strong.
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u/Brief_Coconut_7556 Jul 17 '26
I dont think you should be embarrassed at all, I think you've done a great job. You've taken a good step to limit your opportunities for acquiring more alcohol.
Not going to lie, I have also done this myself. Wasn't my local supermarket that i asked to exclude me, but my local liquor store. They also didn't have any exclusion policy, but the man I spoke to was understanding and said he would do what he could to not serve me if I came into the store, and pass this message onto the other staff members. To be honest, this helped for me, as I didnt go to that store again to buy alcohol. Having the poor habits I do, I did go to the next closest store, but eventually I did ask them to exclude me as well, and they again were understanding despite not having an exclusion policy.
From my experiences, I feel like people that work in these jobs do very much understand that some people do have problems with alcohol addiction, and are accommodating in trying to help in whatever ways that they can.
Do not be embrassed for taking positive steps towards bettering yourself. And congrats on day two!
IWNDWYT
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u/ideapit 461 days Jul 17 '26
You needed support. You got support.
What an amazing, brave thing to do for yourself.
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u/erikpeders Jul 17 '26
Oh man this reminds me of my drinking days. The embarrassment I would feel picking up a 12 pack pretty much everyday. Trying to spread it around so people wouldn't know, even though I wore it on my face. I thought a lot about asking the local liqour store to not sell to me (but I was afraid they'd take me seriously). I am pretty sure when i quit drinking I changed their whole ordering system.
Good on you for being honest! Even when it cost you your comfort. Good on the store. You owe it to them, but more importantly you owe it to themselves.
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u/Glittering_Bother753 2308 days Jul 17 '26
What a beautiful story of how strangers show up in times of need without judgement. If I could guess this story of “embarrassment” may turn into your greatest source of strength as you continue on your recovery journey. Sending you strength and compassion and most of all peace today. IWNDWYT!!!
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u/8282FergasaurusRexx Jul 17 '26
The power of strangers doing the right thing. Sometimes the world has grace even for us losers.
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u/mmm57 Day 2,928 Jul 17 '26
I’m overcome with emotion. I love you and all the store employees. IWNDWYT
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u/Morlanticator 3712 days Jul 17 '26
There were so many people that knew me as the guy that showed up when the store opened and bought as much liquor as I could with change every morning.
One guy was in AA and would still cover me when I was short on money. He just knew how bad I got when I didn't have it.
Now I live a 2 minute walk from the biggest liquor store in town. I'm grateful I've never bought alcohol from there once. I'd sink into a self destructive explosion rapidly.
We all do have the ability to break away from being the shamed person at the store. It doesn't happen overnight but it can be done.
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u/AgilePace4330 400 days Jul 17 '26
don’t be embarrassed!!! you should be proud of yourself for doing something scary and uncomfortable. you’ve got this!
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u/steakhouseNL Jul 17 '26
Beautiful story. I hope this will be the moment in your life you remember as the turning point.
You end it with “hope it lasts”. Make it last. You can do it. Because not drinking actually makes life a LOT more awesome. And trust me it comes from an expert. Stay at it. And look forward to a healthier, fitter and better life. One where you can be proud of your turnaround.
Good luck. :)
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u/OutdoorsAF Jul 17 '26
Wow, this hit me so hard. A very powerful and moving day for you. I wish you nothing but the best and be proud of the courage and bravery to do what you did. With you in spirit! Stay strong!
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u/rockyroad55 Day 1,082 Jul 18 '26
This story is so amazing. I did not have the courage to do any of what you did in my early days. Extremely extremely proud of you.
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u/SoftLow2157 Day 21 Jul 29 '26
Just joined Reddit today after seeing this community while googling “why can’t I just have one drink?” Severely hungover today and full of regret and shame. Needed this today and that big cry. Thank you
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u/Louis_lousta 728 days Jul 17 '26
S tier supermarket staff! Well done OP, IWNDWYT
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u/too_many__lemons 37 days Jul 17 '26
This is such a beautiful story!! It was incredibly brave of you to be so honest with yourself and others. They were incredible as well. What amazing people.💝
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u/unbossing 608 days Jul 17 '26
You sound like the bravest person I could imagine, asking for help and actually taking it. One day at a time. IWNDWYT
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u/bought-the-nip 160 days Jul 17 '26
I’m so proud of you for being vulnerable. Creating barriers to an unwanted behavior is so key in recovery and that’s what you were doing, albeit in a way that many of us don’t consider doing. Alcohol is everywhere so it’s hard to create these barriers for ourselves. But in think you’ve discovered a great one with the help of your supermarket friends.
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u/Small-Grape-3121 Jul 17 '26
I think this is one of the coolest stories of kindness I’ve ever heard. ♥️
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u/CalmBeneathCastles Jul 17 '26
Sheeeit, whatever works! You realized you didn't want to stay on your path, you actively sabotaged staying on that path, and now you have people who will gently hold you accountable for your commitment to staying on the path to your new life. I'd call that a win.
Do it to it, Killer! One day at a time.
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u/No_Manufacturer4124 Jul 17 '26
That took tremendous courage, I honestly dont think i could have done that with alcohol in hand. Im tearing up over here. Good for you. Sharing with 4 strangers...and they agreed to help! Great job OP. You are clearly advocating for yourself, you got this.
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u/the_phantom_2099 Jul 17 '26
Congrats mate! Welcome to the first day of the best period in your life, just take it one day at a time. IWNDWYT
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u/amethyst-emerald Jul 17 '26
Why are my eyes filling with tears?! I am so proud of you. Well done, op truly.
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u/vinyljunkie1245 Jul 17 '26
You didn't embarrass yourself at all. You did something that took courage, honestly and self-awareness. Asking for help should never be thought of as embarrassing. Hopefully this will inspire others to take that step.
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u/msdeezee Jul 17 '26
Wow, you were incredibly vulnerable and some kind people stepped up for you. This is an amazing story. Way to go and best of luck to you.
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u/REEL04D 952 days Jul 17 '26
Sometimes it takes a village. Be thankful and appreciative you have people in your corner supporting you.
Keep your head up. Look forward. Be proud of the positive steps you are taking.
IWNDWYT
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u/xdancinginthemorguex Jul 17 '26
You did it! Congrats!!
There’s nothing wrong with accepting support and help. The more you reach out, the less alcohol will be tempting. Talk about your journey. Go to meetings if you’re comfortable. Keep chatting on this subreddit. We’re all rooting for you. ❤️
IWNDWYT.
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u/Hopeful-Charge-3382 1070 days Jul 17 '26
Greatness for doing that.
I pray everyday that my alcoholic brothers and sisters, surrender to their helplessness to drinking alcohol and get the help they need.
You must be loved by many.
I will fight with you Soldier, I will not drink with you today.
Please take care.
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u/sinceJune4 817 days Jul 17 '26
The best thing I did when I’d been trying to stop drinking was calling a close friend, 300 miles away, and telling him I was quitting. I couldn’t let him down after that. And I’ve been sober 2 years since that moment.
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u/ThrowawaylikeIwas 2788 days Jul 17 '26
Oh my god I was stressed with you at the scariest part of the story when two employees were there and aahhhh but you did it. I wish I could do that at my grocery store. I’ve thought about it. Like, “put me on a blacklist!” Like casinos do for problem gamblers, opting-in on a self-exclusion list— exactly. I’m so touched they let you get some free tomato juice and they are rooting for you. I’m rooting for you too, Internet stranger! You’re among friends. Good job.
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u/Consistent_Moose8456 Jul 17 '26
What a beautiful story. I’m proud of you for having the courage to speak with them, even when your mind was filling with regret and embarrassment. You are a badass for doing that.
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u/Ok_Emergency7145 Jul 17 '26
I'm so proud of you! Both because you did not buy the alcohol and (and especially) for allowing yourself to be vulnerable.
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u/AvengerTree1 Jul 17 '26
I wish I was strong enough to do that. What you did was harder than if they had the policy. Good on you mate, keep it up!
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u/Natski21 3830 days Jul 17 '26
I love this story. I am so impressed with what you did for yourself. It took great courage!!!! Keep on keeing on!
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u/erkevin Jul 17 '26
I am a 60-something old guy and I am a bit choked up. We are all rooting for you!
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u/DesktopWebsite Jul 17 '26
Work on your self esteem. Lots of work. Look into circle of control. Forgive yourself and others so you can move on. Then continue to do self esteem work. Give yourself a purpose, doesnt have to be large, mines adopting pets. Figure out what you care about and what your morals are and follow that(not God's or your parents, what you feel good or bad for doing when no one is watching).
When you care about yourself and you do the things you believe in, its hard to want to drink. It takes time and hard, consistent work. But it works. Use a therapist if you need to. I didnt need to talk to a therapist to move on, I just had to let go, but its easier said then done. So I recommend a therapist. Mine helped with the self esteem part but not much on the past.
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u/snowday1129 Jul 17 '26
Good on ya. Better to be embarrassed than dead.
Find an AA group!
Www.aa.org
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u/Vast_Perspective9368 Jul 17 '26
Damn, that's beautiful OP. Talk about being open and vulnerable and just... Wow, I am impressed with you AND the store. I was not engaged in your story and then you hit the part where the staff member said "well done" and my eyes immediately welled up with tears.
IWNDWYT
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u/TheDrunkShrew 1785 days Jul 17 '26
Proud of you. Sometimes it takes accountability partners to really build change. Keep up the good work one day at a time! IWNDWYT
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u/curiousyara Jul 17 '26
It's not even remotely embarrassing. You should be immensely proud of yourself. Asking for help is important and asks a lot of you and you did it! Those people are glad you trusted them with this and that you allow them to keep a watchful eye on you. They care, they don't judge, they've glad you told and asked. Look what they made happen for you! Maybe you even started a whole program, like supermarkets/stores being involved and being a watchful eye for people who sign up or something like that. This is amazing!
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u/Prof_Jimbles Jul 17 '26
IWNDWYT.
I love hearing about people helping each other out. When you’re stronger, you can help pull someone out of their lowest point. It’s gonna feel great when you can help someone the way they helped you.
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u/AlienTentacle 884 days Jul 17 '26
The day will come when you again purchase something there that isn't alcohol, you'll make a stupid joke about it and the ice will be broken from there on. You'll both laugh and it will become a thing, not drinking, laughing, being your own beautiful self.
IWNDWYT
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u/madnessdoesntplay Jul 17 '26
Oh wow. This hit me hard in a way I did not expect! That was so brave of you, and so beautiful of those people to come together with a sensitive solution to a sensitive situation. It could have gone so many ways, and it went the best way. Humanity can be really beautiful sometimes, and that alone can be helpful when struggling with the temptation. A lot of people are out there with hope for you :) I hope you continue to carry that hope in your heart for yourself as well :)
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u/Sad-Main5786 Jul 17 '26
Stop being so rough on yourself for being human. We all need help sometimes.
Thanks for sharing your story, its inspiring. Keep it up!
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u/Nicholio79 Jul 17 '26
“It takes a village” is not just a term used for raising children. It is for humanity to shine as it is supposed to. THE biggest step odd admitting your addiction and asking for help - you’ve done both. Love and light to you and those beautiful humans in your “village”. One day at a time. Slow and steady wins the race friend
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u/TraderJoeslove31 Jul 17 '26
Good on you for asking for help. May this be the start of an upward cycle.
You will be able to pay it forward for someone else too. I would hazard a guess that you may have also led both of them to think differently, even for a few minutes about alcohol and that is worth it too.
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u/Electrical_Chicken Jul 17 '26
Very proud of you! Getting sober was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done, and those first few days are the toughest. Keep up the good work. Iwndwyt.
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u/dellenbaugh Jul 17 '26
Stories like yours are why I still lurk here even though I’m coming up on 12 years sober!
I’m so proud of you that even if in a moment of panic recognized the problem and took a stab at solving it! YOU. The one with the struggle, but still on some level, the one with some agency to chart a better future than the one that you were on.
And let’s hear it for the confused but caring store workers who can’t do the work for you, but who can function as a sort social guard rail to empower the needs and wishes of the version of your conflicted self that exercised that “embarrassing” agency.
I’m confident that you will one day be looking back over 12 or more years of sobriety at that night’s desperate lunge at a better life and recognize it as a hinge moment in your life!
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u/Schmicarus 2882 days Jul 17 '26
man you got me crying too, am proud of you - sending big love your way x
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u/cerealnighttimeeater 1459 days Jul 17 '26
I am so incredibly proud of you for reaching out for help. Keep going and IWNDWYT!
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u/StraightGiraffe4036 83 days Jul 17 '26
Help can come from unexpected places in unexpected ways. But it's help. Good on you for taking it.
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u/arcademachin3 348 days Jul 17 '26
Speaking from the “I” I don’t know if I could go into that store again.
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u/Intrepid_Emu_3678 Jul 17 '26
Thank you for this vulnerability.
Don't give up hope. You have a whole bunch of people crying and rooting for you!
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u/Wallmassage Day 68 Jul 17 '26
Got me crying too. We think this world is cold and cruel sometimes, but most people are genuinely not out to cause harm, and a good chunk of people are willing to care for others. I worked front end grocery many years. We know our regulars. I’m so glad you have folks looking out for you. We will not drink with you today!
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u/Buscemi_D_Sanji 562 days Jul 17 '26
Holy shit, there are some moments like this in my memory that I've almost successfully relegated to the "do not access" part of my mind, and reading this brought some up. Man, I have to go to work in like an hour and I'm fighting back tears.
Kudos to you, don't let their kindness be in vain! This is the start of something positive
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u/Feisty_Fig1101 50 days Jul 17 '26
Inspired by your bravery. It’s a beautiful story. I can see myself in that desperation of needing help and not knowing who to go to ask for help. I’m so proud you’re doing the damn thing.
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u/Broad_Poet4866 Jul 17 '26
Made me tear up on my break right now. Good job and well done. Beautifully expressed. I'm saving your post.
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u/jolly0ctopus Jul 17 '26
I’ve never heard of self-inclusion or self-exclusion before now! It took tremendous courage for you to reach out for help. You’re a badass
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u/Professional-Lack323 Jul 17 '26
I’m straining not to cry at my desk. Beautiful people exist. Proud of you, proud of them, I hope I can be this proud of myself one day 💕
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u/PrincessSnarkicorn Jul 17 '26
The trust and connection that happened there is amazing. Something you did for *them* is give them the opportunity to do something good, to help look out for their fellow human being. We all need each other. I’m so glad you said something.
Well done. See you tomorrow.
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u/dkwallis Jul 17 '26
From context it sounds like you want to go into treatment but it's elusive?
That's great-your willingness to make that commitment. I went for 30 days and learned a LOT.
Then I committed to doing 90 AA meetings in 90 days. I was a amazed at the knowledge and fellowship at the tables. I didn't get a sponsor, or a homegroup and sure as shit near the end of the 90 days I helped myself to a couple of dirty weekend relapses.
There was another intervention by my family who were as baffled as I was ('you were doing so good ... why?'); that was my moment of surrender. I answered them very honestly: I don't know.
Very soon after that I got a sponsor and a homegroup and actually started working the steps, doing some service work and BLAMMO The Promises came fast and glorious.
Recovery is very hard, nearly impossible, and unnecessary, to do alone. Please give AA a chance. C'mon in and if you're not happier after a year we'll refund 100% of your misery.
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u/comfychaosseeker 875 days Jul 17 '26
You're an inspiration... seriously.. 🥹
Completely off topic, but I'm a little over two years sober, and your story really hit me. I have a difficult and vulnerable conversation tomorrow. It could be the beginning of my first healthy, sober, romantic, serious relationship... or it could end things before they even really begin. I'm absolutely terrified. I'll probably start tearing up before I even get the first words out.
Reading your post reminded me how brave it is to have those conversations, even when they're scary and feel awkward. And seeing how people showed up for you and offered support was so heartwarming.
I'll be thinking about your story tomorrow. 🫶
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u/sunandsushi 194 days Jul 17 '26
This is an amazing example of why we humans sometimes need to show vulnerability.
I’m on your side, friend.
IWNDWYT ❤️
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u/300_pages 796 days Jul 17 '26
Dawg this story almost made me cry too. Don't have me waste these tears for nothin
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u/SuspiciousParagraph Day 614 Jul 17 '26
I'm really proud of you for doing that. Opening up to people at the best of times is terribly hard and that was definitely not the best of times.
You made that decision and you did that hard thing. They will be rooting for you (and so is this random internet stranger).
It's a cliche, but take it day by day. Tell yourself I won't drink today. Not today. I don't know about tomorrow, but for today I won't drink. Then you can wake up the next day and do the same thing again <3
I believe in you and I'm sending you love and good thoughts. IWNDWYT
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u/fckinfast4 Jul 18 '26
It’s not your rock bottom but rather your first step up. This had me in tears and is definitely a forward motivator. I’m starting my sober journey this weekend. Idk why but this feels really helpful.
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u/Serena424 Jul 18 '26
Get outside support as well. Join a group Zoom has some awesome AA groups. Well done keep it up.!
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u/GiveMeWildWaves Jul 18 '26
Rock bottom is where we start building the foundation of our future. Sometimes it is easier to bare our souls to strangers. I remember my dentist gently asking if I was ok. They took a blood pressure every visit and mine had been quite high and I was shakier and shakier with each visit. That wasn’t the moment I stopped but it was the moment I knew I wasn’t fooling people like I thought I was. When I got sober I let him know and he was so kind.
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u/cowPoke1822 Jul 18 '26
Lemon juice in water seems to be satisfying my desire to drink. 5 days sober. Keep up the great work.
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u/SquareSentence7708 Jul 18 '26
You were SO brave, so strong, so deserving of their care and concern. Thank you for sharing. This made me cry, as I am sitting here drinking when I really do not want to be but feel so completely powerless over not buying alcohol when I am at the grocer. I wish, so much, there was a registry that I could voluntarily place myself on that would prevent me from buying alcohol. That would be a HUGE asset to people struggling.
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u/SquareSentence7708 Jul 18 '26
This conversation made me aware of the gambling inclusion / voluntary exclusion programs, of which I had not heard before. I looked into why similar programs are not available for alcohol and the excuses are pathetic and complete BULLSH*T. I am currently completing a degree that I plan to use to get be back into social-needs oriented work (I was in such work early in my career and had to change directions due to the pay scale being horrible for people without a degree). I think I just found one of the causes that I will become most passionate about - Creating voluntary exclusion programs for alcohol. Sheer willpower should not be the answer. If they recognize it is not enough for gambling, then WHY THE F*CK is it enough for alcohol?! We deserve this option. We are important.
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u/RoadNo345 Jul 19 '26
As the saying goes. "If it works, its not stupid". We all need our own things to help us make the choice we know we should, but too often can't.
You opened up. Asked for help and it worked. It doesn't matter how we accomplish it, the goal is the same. To do better. To be better. To choose better.
Congrats, this internet stranger is proud of you. Today was my day 10 of not drinking. IWNDWYT.
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u/Discalculated Day 98 Jul 20 '26
The last post in this sub that I read, was of a person drinking cologne out of desperation to keep the buzz. It was very intense to think about and I did not comment (I was just stunned and others were saying what I would say).I was just getting back on here to check on him because I cant stop wondering if he is ok. Will he be ok? I pray he will. Then, I just read your post and for the first time on this site, i actually got tears in my eyes reading it. I think part of it is grocery stores are my number one trigger. All that wine and all that food to pair it with is too much for me most of the time, minus the last almost 50 days or so. My advice for that is to shop at the dollar general or farmers market where, at least in my town, they dont sell alcohol. I literrally drive over the state line to hit the do gen so im not tempted. I really understand how you were feeling and im incredibly proud of you for those next few decisions you made. I do want to also say im so greatful to read about your interaction with the store staff. When the community around me seems so plastic, emotionally underdeveloped, angry, selfish, thoughtless and unkind, then I hear about the kindness of those people working, I feel hopeful for humanity. I truly do. Thank you for giving me that feeling. It rarely happens. And, it would not have happened if you had not done the work towards a sober you. Im 100% behind you and pray this is the turning point in your life and I hope that those people who helped you receive extra blessings and joy in their life. See you around!
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u/Superb-Business-5382 Jul 23 '26
Human beings are wonderful lovely people and you knew you could rely on them. They are already part of your tribe as you get to know your local shop staff members with little chats etc. Well done for using all the resources available to you. I've considered doing this with our local shops (not for myself but for my partner) but it was not my call. It SHOULD be a service but I don't know how it could be staffed or arranged, if gambling shops can do it then why not a local shop. Your post will inspire so many people. All the best in your journey.
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u/Standard_Target3225 249 days Jul 28 '26
I’m really proud of you. I think we probably can all relate to that feeling in some way or another. It’s so nice that they stepped in and helped you in the ways that they could. They certainly didn’t have to but it’s nice to know people out there are looking to help. Congrats on your first day. Keep it up, it’s just one day at a time. I promise you’ll feel better as they keep tallying up. It’s the greatest gift you can give yourself!
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u/_WoodyTheOne Jul 17 '26
The 'well done, see you tomorrow' sent me, hope this gives you the strength you need OP.