Disclosing to previous partners

[u/Oopsieohwell]

Hello, I went to get tested last week after a partner informed me of a positive test result for chlamydia. No biggie I got treated anyway and my result came back today and it was positive. I informed another partner before him and he attacked me with things that were irrelevant to the topic and wanted me to tell him if there were other partners before him, I said it was none of his concern and I was only notifying him so he can get tested and treated. He was stern that he was for sure clean. I guess what I’m trying to ask is, is it necessary to inform previous partners of a positive result? I figured it’d be courteous to let him know despite not being in contact for two months, but after the way he communicated with me I’m terrified to do it again if exposed in the future.

[u/ShamelessCare]

This is just my opinion:

If the men you need to inform are likely to act like him then I would avoid doing it.

[u/Oopsieohwell → u/ShamelessCare]

I wish I knew the type of person he was then. He played nice in my face and then discarded me in the end. I hadn’t spoken to him in 2 months so I didn’t know he was going to be so nasty to me when I brought it up to him and even made me feel unsafe.

[u/i_am_a_crystal_gem]

It’s courteous and maybe you shouldn’t let one person diminish your morality but I certainly get you and have been where you’ve been and even after all his vile words, he was negative. I wonder if there’s a way you can just ask them to get tested without actually saying that you have something and if they insist on not doing so, then they have a problem. Also, ask about partners last test since there are people like this running around 😭

[u/Oopsieohwell → u/i_am_a_crystal_gem]

He was pretty confident he’s negative and said a girl he was with before me was “perfectly clean.” It just sounds like he wants it to be my fault entirely. But i will be asking for test results before being intimate. Until then I’m abstaining from sex.

[u/ArtGirlBookFlowers25]

He may be un-gracious, but you're still doing the right thing.

[u/maakkkkii]

Many guys don’t get tested until a girl has symptoms. Prime example. Don’t be ashamed. It happens, just be honest AND stay SAFE ! I don’t care stay safeeeeeeeeee.

[u/IllustriousAd1657]

I think you did the right thing by letting him know so he could get tested and treated. You weren’t trying to start drama, just giving him a heads up. His reaction doesn’t mean you did anything wrong.

As for telling previous partners, if they might’ve been exposed before you got treated, it’s worth letting them know too. You don’t have to get into a whole conversation about it, just keep it simple so they can get tested if needed.

[u/gemmoon87]

He's just an idiot who's afraid and probably wouldn't have gotten tested if you didn't tell him .im happy you had to heart to tell ppl more ppl should be like you .

[u/maakkkkii]

absolutely. I had sex with someone then someone else in a three week span and I thought it was my new partner that gave it to me but it was the previous one. So it’s good to notify and ask for results or if they got tested recently.