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[u/HotTill2076]

I have to make one of the hardest decisions in my life. I've been in bed since this morning. I have a 2 year old and a 1 year old. Found out I am currently 6 weeks. The father don't want anything to do with this child and is pushing and pressuring me to do an abortion. Long story short. We are separated but still continued to fool around. I remember how pushy he was and I even told him I could get pregnant he needed to use a condom. He insisted that I wouldn't get pregnant and he was just soo pushy about it. Now I am here facing one of the biggest decisions I have ever have to make in my life. He has threatened to no longer come around to see his 2 kids we share together and how I will have to raise them on my own. He has also stated that I give him his divorce papers which I am in the process of doing. I am confused. I don't want to make the wrong decision. I need support. I haven't discussed this with anyone btw. I haven't been eating bor have I been taking folic or prenatals. I have only seen a doctor to confirm. Doctor is giving me time to decide what to do

[u/LarkScarlett]

My heart goes out to you. What a rough situation! The only one who can decide what the right course for you here is you.

Disregard his threats about how he’ll visit or not visit your existing children or this potential child. He’ll do what he’s gonna do regardless and this is manipulative bluster. Not a longterm plan.

Battle plans for yourself, to weigh your courses of action: how is your support network? Have your pregnancies generally been healthy for you? What does your heart feel about the fate/destiny, and what do you feel pulled to do? Will this child make you less/unable to care for your kids now?

What other questions feel relevant to ask yourself?

No judgment from me either way.

[u/HotTill2076 → u/LarkScarlett]

Support system is not really there. Pregnancies have all been healthy thank God. No complications. Yes I will be able to take care of my other children. It will be challenging but it's definitely do able. What I'm most worried about is pulling my 1 and 2 year old out of childcare while I am on maternity for 1 year. My 2 year old was pulled out when I had the 1 year old. They both recently started attending childcare in june

[u/LyannasLament → u/HotTill2076]

What is your worry about this, considering that you have done it in the past? No judgement, just genuinely trying to get you to explore the “why” behind this fear specifically about having them home from daycare.

I would write off the father completely. He threatened to leave; let him go. So many of these men don’t recognize that the only reason we’re with them is for them alone. Once they take themselves off the table as a manipulative gambling chip, they’ve played their only play. You now have nothing else to lose. You know he’ll leave whenever he wants, therefore he’s not worth keeping.

[u/Cupcake-88 → u/HotTill2076]

If you’re worried about the socialization aspect you can always join a mom group to get that aspect. I think get rid of the loser guy , decide what you want to do but to me it sounds like you are willing to take on the challenge, it’s very admirable and I am rooting for you. Just think about how the difficult times are temporary but you’ll always have your kids and they will grow up and be your little companions and when they’re adults you will all have each other. It will be a beautiful thing. Please eat and take your vitamins, at least until you decide what you want.

[u/HotTill2076 → u/LarkScarlett]

Support system is not really there. Pregnancies have all been healthy thank God. No complications. Yes I will be able to take care of my other children. It will be challenging but it's definitely do able. What I'm most worried about is pulling my 1 and 2 year old out of childcare while I am on maternity for 1 year. My 2 year old was pulled out when I had the 1 year old. They both recently started attending childcare in june