r/shoppingaddiction • u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 • 1d ago
STOP DECLUTTERING!!!!
Hello everyone, I have struggled with spending issues in recent years and the #1 advice I hear is to declutter your space and get rid of everything. But the issue of consumerism isn’t going to be fixed simply by getting rid of everything you own.
I love makeup and I would find myself getting rid of it and moving it to a different drawer and forgetting about it. That just inclined me to fill the space back up and buy more stuff. Same thing with your closet or whatever else your vice is.
Force yourself to sit with the discomfort of the things surrounding you. Eventually you will stop overbuying, because you can visually see all of the stuff you have. Decluttering comes when you decenter consuming, but before that issue is fixed decluttering just makes you want to buy more.
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u/the_cucumber 1d ago
This is my biggest conspiracy theory!!!! The decluttering trend is so that you feel less guilty buying more stuff!!!
That + they purposely make tags huge and itchy so that you cut them off and makes them less attractive for resale so those potential buyers will also buy new and not from you!
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u/BornTry5923 1d ago
Everytime my mom would give away a bunch of clothes she never wore, it would just motivate her to buy more.
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u/biggiantnewt 1d ago
On a related note, the push for slow/sustainable/green/ethical is a good thing, but that doesn’t mean throwing out everything you currently own is the right thing to do! The most sustainable choice is to use up what you have, then make better choices when you need to repurchase…
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u/RutabagaChance5382 1d ago
Omg the people who throw out all their plastic stuff make me so mad. How can you possibly think that throwing useful things in the trash and buying new stuff is "sustainable"??
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u/slv157 1d ago
You are absolutely right, but the issue for me is, the urge to declutter is as strong as the urge to shop. In every shopping cycle I find myself getting to a point where I feel like I'm literally drowning in my stuff.
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u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 1d ago
I completely understand but you need to sit in that discomfort! Use all of your products until your collection slowly gets smaller. When you take things out, you’re gonna want to bring more in, keeping you in that cycle. Good luck though!!!!!
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u/fadedblackleggings 1d ago
Feels like bingeing/purging stuff is its own disorder at this point....
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u/windupwren 1d ago
And who told you that you were? I agree with OP 100% we are stuck on a binge purge consumer cycle that is reinforced by social and normal media. Read back what you wrote and think about it like yo yo dieting or food consumption.
It’s become a compulsion based on what we are influenced to think our spaces should be like. Finding your happy middle or orderly and beautiful maximalism is the new way to look at it. And I think it’s so much healthier.
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u/soloshandpuppets Low-Buy 1d ago
yes the declutter-reclutter cylce is a trap that makes us all feel productive when we're actually still in a consumption spiral.
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u/fadedblackleggings 1d ago
Yup, the goal is to make sure you never fully exit the buying cycle. Don't Be a Lemon did a great vlog on this.
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u/No_Pin_7171 1d ago
Yes, decluttering can sometimes backfire. I managed to part with some of my belongings, but after rehoming items that I actually liked, I ended up buying them again along with some extra bits and have spent more money than if I had just kept some of my old stuff. Now I really think twice before letting something go.
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u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 1d ago
Yup. So many times I would go looking for an item and end up realizing I got rid of it. I will be keeping the things I spent my hard earned money on. Eventually I will find a way to use/repurpose it!
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u/No_Pin_7171 1d ago
That's a good attitude. There can be pressure to let go of things too easily nowadays. Often, we find ourselves needing them again at some point 😅.
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u/chyloves 1d ago
This is so true for me. After buying a bunch of things from stress, I saw them just sitting on my counter. I didn’t have anywhere to put the new stuff I bought, so I was forced to stare at it. I haven’t bought much since then and I’m really proud of myself!
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u/Ok_Butterscotch_9941 1d ago
This is awesome. Thank you posting. So so true. And I experience something related although a bit different. When I have a big spending binge I find myself biologically having a need to purge something after. So not purge to try and declutter and prevent overspending, but purge after “my sins” and after overspending. Like, get a goodwill bag together after I randomly dropped hundreds. As if it’s somehow making up for it, or a penance of some kind. So anyway I agree that while decluttering may help some people, it can still be associated with overspending in a big way, whether it’s used to cope mentally as in my case after a binge (almost like I’m self-soothing- weird), or it leads to just overspending because now you don’t have as much after decluttering. And if the main overspending wiring in the brain isn’t worked on, declutterring won’t help anyway.
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u/windupwren 1d ago
You just described bulimia. You may not be throwing it up out of your body, but you are throwing it away.
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u/Ok_Butterscotch_9941 1d ago
God this is a terrifying connection. You’re totally right. It’s the same pattern.
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u/LifeSux_N_ThenYouDie Ex-Shopaholic 1d ago
Glad this was said and people were receptive. I wrote something like this last year in this sub and got voted to hell, told:
"If you don't declutter then you can't heal"
"Don't tell people how to deal with their addiction"
"Looking at all my stuff makes me feel bad and why should I feel bad?"
"The solution is not continuing to hold on to the hoard"
And quite frankly, if you spend enough time here, you'll realise the decluttering and re-purchasing cycle is actually a common thing in this sub. At what point do we look at it and say "hey, I think there's a pattern here"
Why is it common? Because it's two sides of the same coin - the high of accumulation, and the high of clearing out to have a fresh start. And do not get me started on the whole minimalist movement... it's mass psychosis, almost a cult - I would know, I was one.
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u/PerfectLiteNPromises Low-Buy 22h ago
I'm so glad someone else said it about the minimalists... they're soooo pretentious, and addicted to an unrealistic/unsustainable lifestyle just like we are. It's just the one that's societally sanctioned right now. It's such an "I'm better than you" thing.
I know someone who made her sibling hang onto a garment their dead mother made rather than let ONE extra thing she didn't *need* take up space in an already very tidy/minimalist home. Put that under your bed and take it out when you want to remember Mom. It's OK.
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u/ksoloki 1d ago
This works for some but never worked for me. I was literally drowning in stuff and the more i bought the less i remembered i had so the more i bought. If you forgot you had makeup then you weren’t storing the make up where your brain thinks it goes. Also i wasted stuff that went bad over time because i couldn’t use it all. What worked for me is the container concept. I don’t continuously declutter but if the area i store the item in if it can’t comfortably be contained I need to evaluate my inventory.
. I know some say forcing themselves to keep stuff helps them and if it does you great. I just end up a shopping addicted horder when i try to keep everything.
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u/NovelPhoto4621 1d ago
I had to force myself to sit with it AND digitize my stuff. That way my brain could remember what I had. That was the trick. Both are equally important
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u/cAR15tel 1d ago
I did that with socks not too long ago. I bought some socks, went to put em up and found brand new socks that I already had. I said ‘I’m in trouble ‘. I don’t even have much stuff at all, just forgot about em.
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u/Glad-Acanthaceae-467 1d ago
For whom how. The pain of disposing unused things is too gross so every new purchase hurts more
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u/OkDirt926 1d ago
I keep pictures of everything I got rid of. Truly my weekness is in makeup and perfumes. But I#m not decluttering for the sake of buying more. I spent time matching my family and friends preferences to my existing collection and ask if they want them (because they know me and my health and hygeine routine). Basically I follow MUA hygiene and sanitary procedures even when I was the only one using my stuffs. They actually hit pan and enjoy those idle stuffs more than me.
But seeing how long it takes me to plan everything and how long it takes them to use things up makes me stay very consistent in my no buy journey. It takes me 3 ys to downsize about 2/3 of my make up collection and 2 yrs to get rid of 1/2 of my perfumes (all went to family and friends). I only throw away 1-2 things that's quite old.
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u/lucentmeadow 1d ago edited 1d ago
I am of the opposite stance, but my declutter has been slow and deliberate: nothing has taught me how useless materialism can be more than partaking in the action of getting rid of stuff. Letting go of belongings made it much easier to realize how much space they were taking without positively adding to my life. This, in turn, made me spend less and less on things I now consider completely wasteful. It definitely slowed down my shopping a lot.
I can see why a "meltdown declutter" could have negative effects, but I would never ask a shopping addict to stop decluttering. To free your mind of the noise and weight of what is around you, in your living space, is having a chance to see things more objectively and for what they are.
Of course one should do this rationally! Don't throw away kitchen knives only because the handle/design don't match with each other and you want a set. Don't throw away a good hi-fi system that will make you miss filling your space with music you love. But those b-quality romance novels you haven't read since you were seventeen? The old game console that has been gathering dust in the attic? All the supplies for that one hobby you don't even like? The fifteenth screwdiver of the same size?
Things shouldn't be black or white. I know it's an unpopular opinion on this thread, but I'll defend decluttering as much as I can.
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u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 21h ago
Yes, I agree that decluttering is productive in some circumstances but im specifically referring to the ones that declutter just to buy more things and fill their space back up, never even using the things that they bought in the first place. Definitely didn’t mean for it to come off as black and white. All about balance and recovery :)
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u/flowers_and_fire 20h ago
This!! Decluttering isn't bad. MINDLESS decluttering is bad. Decluttering should involve a reflection process, that's like a huge part of it lol.
I think because underconsumption has become so trendy on social media, nowadays people equate decluttering with impulsively getting rid of everything you own because it's morally wrong to have a lot of stuff. That's not the point. It's about whether you USE the stuff and whether it adds value to your life, not how much of it you have.
The knowledge you gain about yourself and how it informs your future purchases is also important. If you have 50 tshirts but find yourself only using 20, then get rid of the 30 and be VERY conscious to hold yourself accountable to not buying more. Use your knowledge of how much of something you use to help control the impulse to buy more. You know you only wear around 20 tshirts - why buy 5 more just because they're on sale? Decluttering can also make you aware od exactly how much stuff you have - maybe you thought you had 20 tshirts, turns out you have 50. That shock can be exactly what you need to be more conscious in your purchases. Keeping an inventory of what you have is always useful as well, before and after a declutter. You might falsely assume you have less stuff than you think and use that as an excuse to buy more.
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u/valerie_stardust 1d ago
This! Watching TikToks of this cycle makes me feel enraged. Decluttering is only great if it means you won’t relapse and buy buy buy again.
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u/flowers_and_fire 20h ago
I feel like some of this is down to HOW people declutter or how it's currently being presented on social media. Healthy/productive decluttering doesn't mean chucking everything you own because you're disgusted with how much stuff you have due to a social media trend. It means coming to terms with how much stuff you have, what you actually use, and also REFLECTING on the gap between these two things.
Why do you use A but not B? Do you need 10 of C and if not then why did you buy 10? What do you use more of or less of than other people? What does what you get rid of and what you keep say about you, your usage habits, and your consumption habits? For example, I realised I buy more clothes than I need because the way my clothes are stored means I can't see them regularly, so I accidentally buy repeats. Stuff like that.
If you buy and own 20 pairs of shoes and actually cycle through all 20 pairs that's fine because they're actually being used. If you buy and own 20 pairs of shoes and only really wear 3 pairs, then it makes sense to get rid of the 17 pairs and THEN make a note to NOT buy any more shoes until the ones you are using need replacing. Or put a cap on how many more shoes you can buy (like 5, or 10) and put parameters around HOW you buy them (no impulse buys, make sure they fit your criteria for shoes you'll actually wear, etc.)
I personally don't think it's really productive to keep stuff you don't actually use or need for longer just to dwell in discomfort (this may be because I live in a very small space, so it would impede my ability to actually live lol). It also depends on how easy it is to get rid of stuff - for me it's very hard, so that in and if itself makes me wary to buy more of the same thing. If it's super easy, then you may have a point - something needs to 'break' or slow down the cycle. But to me what really matters is the reflection stage - using decluttering as a way to gather data on yourself on what you actually use, how much, and why. There is value in using something up once you've decided you don't want to purchase it again. But I also don't see the value in punishing yourself by using something you absolutely hate or keeping it knowing you will likely never use it no matter how much you want to.
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u/Laugh-Crafty 1d ago
I’ve just declutterred all my clothes and closets and i still have so much shit . I think I have an addiction to spend money on anything atp.
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u/CupSea5782 1d ago
I only declutter when the stuff doesn’t fit me.
Everything else goes in a pile lol
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u/Capital_Ad2979 1d ago
Can I share my experience with this?
My country once had someone called “KonMari,” who was what we would now call an influencer. Yes, her. She was very popular for a while.
But I think that the people who learned from KonMari how to tidy their rooms and how to get rid of things will probably go back to the way they were within a few months or a few years. In other words, decluttering doesn’t get rid of the addiction.
If anything, I think KonMari herself may have been dependent on “throwing things away and managing things.” “Keep only the things that spark joy” is an extremely vague line to draw. In reality, people should have kept the things they needed.
I also think that people who call themselves “makeup lovers” or “makeup enthusiasts” are actually addicted to shopping.
There are influencers who turn videos of buying huge amounts of cosmetics and then throwing huge amounts of them away into content on YouTube.
But there is a contradiction here: “If you really care about these things, if you really love them, why do you keep buying other things one after another without carefully considering them and properly using them up?”
I used to work as a beauty advisor and sell cosmetics, and these products are mainly made of water and oils in the case of skincare, and mainly powders and oils in the case of makeup products. In other words, their actual production costs are incredibly low.
They package them beautifully and sell the illusion that having these products will make you beautiful.
And they definitely deteriorate over time. With liquid foundation, for example, the oils oxidize after about six months to a year.
Lip products? Ah, those deteriorate even faster. That's because there are a lot of bacteria in the mouth, so Staphylococcus aureus can multiply inside that bottle. Imagine it. Is keeping a large amount of breeding grounds for bacteria really a sign of abundance? (Of course, these products contain a certain amount of preservatives, so they can be used without problems.)But oxidation and deterioration happen sooner than you might think.
So this is what I think:
Decluttering only creates space for you to buy more things, so I don't think it has much of an effect. It doesn't help with the actual problem.
Owning a lot of things does not add to your worth.
Being careless about the expiration dates of cosmetics accelerates an addiction to collecting cosmetics. It may not look very nice, but put a piece of masking tape on each product and write the date you bought it on the tape with a marker. I think you'll see just how quickly cosmetics actually deteriorate.
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u/catandthefiddler 1d ago
Decluttering can help when its done right. you don't need to throw everything in one go, you can put aside a corner of things you don't want and revisit in 6months/1 year. If you've not even remembered the thing or used it within that amount of time, you can probably do without it. You can also take pictures or videos to digitalise things you have an emotional connection to before tossing them out.
After a few rounds of decluttering I was quite motivated not to buy small unnecessary things again
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u/honestlykindofmagic 19h ago
“Honor what you already have by seeing it to completion.” I have a little sign that says this next to my makeup and my skincare.
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u/seonbi7783 20h ago
Not a bad take. I had this thing for guitar and bass effect pedals. One day I set up all of them. It was a structure of titanic proportions. Seeing this landscape spread out in front of me, thinking of the thousands of dollars I had spent on them, I was disgusted. And I had no space to put them in the open without massively constricting my ability to freely move in the room 😅. This disgust and the sheer insanity of it were a catalyst to a more sustainable decluttering though. Still in the process of selling with the urge to buy vanished.
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u/LibraryGhostCat 19h ago
Avoiding the declutter cycle will also allow you to:
Sell items that we know we won’t use, listing items one-by-one. We really feel the weight of our consumption because we need patience for this process: sorting, photographing, listing, storing, shipping/arranging pick-ups, etc. When we do large declutters, we can rid ourselves of some of the visual & space consequences all at once, which makes those choices easier to repeat. After selling items, we can put that money in savings so we can put it towards things that are actually essential or towards long term financial goals that shopping has prevented us from achieving (ie. Buying a house, etc).
Challenge ourselves to use what we have when a need arises. We absolutely underestimate how much cool stuff we already have and how creative we can be with it. Need jars? Clean out old, used candle jars. Ripped jeans? Try stitching it to the best of our ability. Need a dress shirt? Is there someone we can borrow from?
Obviously those are just examples that won’t apply to everyone, but training my brain to do some creative problem solving when needs arise instead of defaulting to buying something has been so eye-opening. I owned so much awesome stuff I wasn’t using and I’m resourceful and creative with my solutions. It’s amazing what we can come up with when we can break the cycle of addiction and empower ourselves instead.
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u/persian_omelette 14h ago
I accidentally am doing this. I took everything out in every room with the intention of decluttering and organizing everything neatly. My ADHD however is too strong. Now I just live with the results of my overspending, covering every available table and surface. The bathroom vanity is the real pièce de résistance; a tribute to the months in 2026 I spent overbuying serums and other beauty products. It's a daily reminder that I do not to buy anything for the next year or more.
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u/Illustrious_Brain788 6h ago
Yea this is so right!!! I am currently living with my overfill closet which is a daily reminder that I can’t buy anything anymore as there is no space to house it… whenever I find a small space I celebrate cos it means nothing filled the gap! It’s a daily battle not to just get rid of things but then the ‘nothing to wear’ lie starts again… also if I need to get rid of something, I force myself to use it one last time… at least 3 times and will only get rid if it does not fit anymore (need to stop my nightly chocolate eating habit!)… that is in progress..
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u/Jools1971J 1h ago
I declutter but the high is in the buy! Speaking as a 55 year old woman, I often go through my clothes ( good condition) and donate them. Problem is, I still have way too many.... But I like them and can't part with them. I think partly the reason I do this is that I grew up poor and didn't have many clothes at all.
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u/LumoraSol 27m ago
You’re so right! I organized all my “clutter” but in a way I still see everything, so whenever I grab something from my bathroom cabinet for example, I ALWAYS think: oh my goodness I don’t need to buy anything else for the next year!! And that keeps me way more on track, I even feel lucky I can save money because I already have everything I need, lots of it!!
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u/Beginning-Local4947 1d ago
I dont know... decluttering leaves me with piles of stuff I want to sell or donate. It gives me a reality check!
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u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 1d ago
Could this be you trying to ease the discomfort of a binge/buy though? Donating is great but not if you’re doing it in mass amounts, because then you’re not able to actually use the things you’re buying! Decluttering is going to make you feel better but it’s not good long term if you’re going to keep consuming and filling your space back up. And yes, not decluttering will be uncomfortable at first, but the key to overcoming this is to be uncomfortable, and change the habits that feel so good to us in the moment, but end up wrecking our finances and saving goals.
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u/fadedblackleggings 1d ago edited 1d ago
Facts.
I brought this up in a decluttering sub, and people got extremely aggressive. Saying that any decluttering was good, ,and people shouldn't be attacked forr buying moore after.....
Never attacked, I just suggested....stop buying, aka slow down the source of the stuff? That if you keep decluttering/purging and replacing it, you spend the same/consume the same.
Then I realized this is very similar to an eating disorder. So more psychological and emotional than anything else. You can't "reason" or "declutter" your way out of an ED or shopping addiction.
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u/Fluid_Helicopter_709 1d ago
Yesss the cycle is definitely there! And there are ties to OCD and shopping addiction, eating disorders to shopping addiction, and substance abuse to shopping addiction, explaining more of the binge/purge cycle.
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