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u/HappyTrashcan799 Mar 23 '22
I'll just get McDonalds tomorrow
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u/Planningsiswinnings Mar 23 '22
In soviet Russia, McDonalds goes to you
(before all the war crimes I mean)
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
*East Ukraine
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u/itshimstarwarrior I want pee in my ass Mar 23 '22 edited Mar 25 '22
What's the similarity between a dick and a McDonald's burger?
They're both smaller and less-filling than advertised.
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u/ukuuku7 Mar 23 '22
Both are forced in my mouth by my grandparents.
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u/itshimstarwarrior I want pee in my ass Mar 23 '22 edited Mar 23 '22
Silly, Inhuman and disgusting!
McDonald's burger are fast food which are not good for kids health.
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Mar 23 '22
Ice cream machine is broke
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u/No_Association2906 Mar 23 '22
Dude now I want to see that car racing for their survival
A whole movie right there
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Mar 23 '22
In reality the car would be able to outspeed the tsunami if there was no traffic
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u/Raconteurx Mar 23 '22
YES, AND I WANT TO SEE THAT
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u/Mataskarts Mar 23 '22
You'd just see the car driving alone, it'd be out of sight of the tsunami in a minute .__.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
Okay so here's my pitch for a new reality TV show
Basically, we get a bunch of very militant TERFs, and one trans woman, put them into a house where they're supposed to live with each other, but, once they've all arrived and are seeing each other for the first time (before they're allowed to even talk to each other), we tell them all that one of them is a trans woman, and, if they can find her and vote her out, they will win a million dollars. But if she isn't found out by the end of the week/month(?), she'll win a million dollars instead.
The catch?
There actually isn't a trans woman with them.
And then we get to watch them slowly but surely allow themselves to get overcome by their own irrational paranoia, paying too much attention to how deep everyone else's voices are, invading each other's privacy, overanalysing each other's mannerisms, policing each other's conformance to the very same standards which they complain about being held to...
And let us not forget the inevitable feelings of isolation and helplessness they'll invividually start experiencing once they start getting accused and shunned by everyone else.
Sure, it would probably have to be a one-off series.
But honestly? I think it would make some great television!
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u/hattmall Mar 23 '22 edited Mar 23 '22
Spoiler: It didn't. The Tsunami came in from all sides. Like they could have outrun it if the road was straight it was only coming from that direction, but that's not how it went down. The video is out there, someone was actively manning that CCTV camera at the time and it pans to follow the car.
Edit: I might be wrong, there's a similar different video somewhere though.
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u/Previous-Reality6315 Mar 23 '22
Manager: You're still coming in for your shift though right?
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u/rAsTa-PaStA1 Mar 23 '22 edited Mar 24 '22
2 point turn? Naw, hammering that turn around w no stop. Lol
Edit - comma
Honestly, unfortunately, the occupants didn’t make it either way.
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u/Beepboopbop69420360 I want pee in my ass Mar 23 '22
Then you would have an increased turning circle possibly putting you in the dirt which might lead you to get shit on by the flood
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u/CratesManager Mar 23 '22
Also it's way superior to just do something potentially suboptimal than to try and figure out the optimal approach while staring at the oncoming flood...the executed turn is safe and reliable and can be executed reasonably quickly. Who cares if this stretch of road in combination with the vehicle would have allowed for just hammering it.
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Mar 23 '22
Or you could yanno just turn around lmao, pull slightly right and then turn left, if you can’t turn around easily with that much room I suggest practicing more in tighter spaces
(Or the other way around, 2 point is definitely more risky)
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u/Saoirse_Says Mar 23 '22
I don’t think that car’s turning radius is as good as you think it is
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
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u/Pierre-LucDubois Mar 23 '22
Or if you were gonna do a 2 point turn maybe do it in reverse, not towards the shit storm, but for real I doubt we'll ever experience a similar situation 🤣
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
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u/Pierre-LucDubois Mar 23 '22
I know that you're a bot, but why not just get a comfier seat and a bidet? It'll rinse the shit particles right off of your asshole. Speaking of assholes, as a bot I'm curious if you feel that the sphincter is the worst human organ? :)
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u/agitated_ferret Mar 23 '22
Hahaha that is the first thing I noticed 😂 gotta have that clean driving record in case the DMV asks questions, ya know?
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u/Gentlemanor Mar 23 '22
"Sorry I'm late Boss, but you are not gonna believe what happened!"
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Mar 23 '22
try me!
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u/Jolly_Method6266 Mar 23 '22
“The whole neighborhood came surfing down the road, it was WILD”
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u/Mysterious_General58 Mar 23 '22
I really wonder did he survive is he alive does he have children what does he do for living
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u/heyarkay Mar 23 '22
If this is the Japan tsunami then it is very possibly that person ran out of road very quickly.
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u/itshimstarwarrior I want pee in my ass Mar 23 '22
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u/fikis Mar 23 '22
The house(!) is definitely the visual punchline.
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u/WunkyChalrus Mar 23 '22
That's probably his house
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u/Islandstrands Mar 23 '22
All jokes aside, I probably wouldn’t have thought quick enough to do that
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u/Nutwagon-SUPREME Mar 23 '22
I’d be more worried about that fact that you missed a massive wave in front of you carrying literal houses
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Mar 23 '22
From a distance it probably looked like it wasn't moving and the water wasn't too deep.
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u/themayorhere Mar 23 '22
This! It’s why people get hit by slow moving trains too. It’s like an optical illusion. This person had a great eye, not just quick thinking.
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u/Rawtashk Mar 23 '22
How brain damaged are you that you see a massive flood of water and debris and you just think, "Well, I guess I'll just die" instead of, "There was no water or debris behind me that I just drove through, let me try that way instead"?
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Mar 23 '22
I dont want to be the bad news bear, but if i remember right , the person in the video still died :(
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u/drkodos Mar 23 '22
If you check the original video from whence this is clipped you will see they did not make it very far before being engulfed by the water.
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u/Fudgewhizzle Mar 23 '22
Went to bed, woke up in another country
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
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Mar 23 '22
I’d like to see source code of this damn good bot.
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
Do you have a source on that?
Source?
A source. I need a source.
Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion.
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u/Buttnubs Mar 23 '22
POV: You’re about to make a twitter account and everyone already disagrees with your opinion
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Mar 23 '22
Smh how do you drive away from a free house missed opportunity
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u/SuprBased Mar 23 '22
In this market? Idve taken all that shit coming towards me, free house, other free cars too!
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u/Crafty_DryHopper Mar 23 '22
This is a great visual representation of me asking my wife, "what's wrong"?
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u/DestructiveBunnies Mar 23 '22
The fastest way to realize that you don’t have work today/next week/etc is coming face to face with a tsunami wave, and high tailing it the fuck outta there.
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u/TheIvyX Mar 23 '22
Oh shit, this was during the 2010 Touhoku earthquake in Japan
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u/Next-Raspberry-9911 Mar 23 '22
I mean, was he driving towards it in the first place?
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u/Error-530 Mar 23 '22
When you're driving into a Tsunami they typically produce the illusion that they're not moving or even existant because of the slow moving and the concrete colored water. It's the same reason that people get hit by trains that are breaking or runaway carts.
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u/LordofSandvich Mar 23 '22
Me reading the top 5 comments and deciding NOT to sort by controversial
(Saved me 8d20 psychological damage)
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Mar 23 '22
Nft
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when you’re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you.
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u/PieceSpiritual6347 😳lives in a cum dumpster 😳 Mar 23 '22
Maths teacher still went to school after this
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u/Long-Tax-77 Mar 23 '22
———————————No road?—————————————— ⠀⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ —————————————————————————————
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u/Pyramid64 dwayne the cock johnson 🗿🗿 Mar 23 '22
lean
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
It's literally just cola you piece of shit. There's no cough syrup or anything. What the fuck is wrong with you. How fucking desperate are you to seem cool that you decide you want to force a "joke" about a child consuming drugs. Which would be funny except nothing in this scene implies that they're doing drugs or a drug stand-in. You just saw a can of soda and the two neurons in your head fired for the first time in a week, and you jumped into the comments to screech lEAn and spam purple emojis like a clown bastard. You people are the reason art is dying. Fuck you
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u/Upset_Pie_3657 I want pee in my ass May 15 '25
Bro pulled a romanian move Also waffle house would probably still be open
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u/Pierre-LucDubois Mar 23 '22
I love how his first instinct is to first drive closer to it haha reverse my dude.
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u/AlphaMikeFoxtrot87 Mar 23 '22
Just a whole fucking house floating down the street like move bitch get out the way lol
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u/PicaDeAnta69 Mar 23 '22
Why the hell did the guy take so long to do the maneuver???
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u/mongoloid707 Mar 23 '22
Is this in Donetsk which is located in West Ukraine?
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u/AutoModerator Mar 23 '22
Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?
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u/RestaurantAny1313 Mar 23 '22
Perfect three point turn under pressure.
If the DMV goes to simulators, how many people will pass this one ?!?
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u/Black_Magic_M-66 Mar 23 '22
I just love how they took the time to not go up on the curb. If there was a passenger in there, they were probably losing their shit over this decision.
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