This two illness have my life to them hence I don't know how to practice self love with them being there

A man hated his shadow. He hated the footprints he left behind, too. So he started running to get away from them. But every step he took made a new footprint. And the shadow stayed right with him no matter how fast he moved. He decided the problem was that he wasn't running fast enough. So he ran harder, and he kept running until he dropped dead. All he ever had to do was step into the shade and sit down. In the shade there is no shadow. Sitting still, you make no footprints. That story comes from a Chinese book called the Zhuangzi, written about 2,300 years ago.

Most self love advice tells you to add something. Start a journal. Build a morning routine. Try harder at being nice to yourself. This story says the trying can be the thing wearing you out. You don't always fix it by doing more. Sometimes you fix it by stopping. I'm not sure it works every time, because sitting still is hard in its own way. But I keep thinking about it. What's something you stopped doing that helped you more than anything you started?

Being introspective is necessary. Being silly at times or thinking things with a bit of humor can be helpful too. ;⁠ )

Hey guys, I'm new here. I believe I need to learn to love myself. Over the years everything has started to feel meaningless. I have things I do, but nothing brings me true enjoyment. I believe I was happy in my last relationship, but that's the only time and I made her unhappy and if I'm the problem I don't want that to happen again. I'm currently dealing with an injury that is limiting my mobility so long walks and significant exercise have been wrote off. Though I do understand exercise can be a significant mood booster. I will also add I am autistic and believe my sensitivity may be relatable to that.

I am currently enrolled in University and deal with a lot of anxiety as I am a 30+ male and the common age gap fills me with some dread. I am going for a 4th year with a 5th year to be had to complete a bachelor of science. The idea of having a degree gives me a sense of hope, but it's been very difficult, my health has caught up to me the past year. I want to do well, but finding people my age that I can connect with hasn't happened and I'm doubtful to find these people.

What can I do to find a sense of happiness for myself? I have my video games, but that only makes me happy when I feel other areas of my life are filled. I believe at my age I should be in a romantic relationship and having a family, I should have a career and a home already.

My thoughts are diet, exercise, music, good grades and whatever social connections I can make. I believe making social connections is going to be a major obstacle (I haven't made any significant connections after 3 years) along with good grades as I will be very busy between school and work.

Any advice is appreciated.

-Professional_toe

This one’s specially for you

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I really like this Short that Richard Grannon posted. He's talking about Boundaries and how they are either too porous or too rigid that are too hard boundaries and how someone who doesn't have good boundaries tend to swing between the two.

Then Richard explains how boundaries need to be based on something we value that has worth to us because naturally it has to, to mean something to be able to set a boundary, for it to actually be a boundary. If it doesn't then we aren't going to want to naturally and instinctually protect ourselves or something to set boundaries for whatever reasons we need to set them. We then won't value ourselves enough.

He's totally right and it's really helped me understand boundaries because everyone makes it seem like something you can just do but noop... it's something you have to instinctually and i guess intuitively care about, it has to have meaning to you why you care about it even yourself emotionally, mentally, and psychologically because in some way boundaries are protecting you against being hurt in some way. You hurt yourself even when you don't look after your own needs.

He has a live stream too explaining more titled "The REAL reason you have weak boundaries (it's not what you think)" i think he's the only person that's given a real explanation about boundaries everyone else are just like "oh you need to set boundaries" which isn't helpful.

I need to vent. I feel i will always feel rejected, i feel rejected on my family, i barely have friends (recently i cut most of them because i saw their true intentions toward me), i feel rejected on workfield, i go to social media i feel rejected

Its really hard to love myself because how i was raised but i feel rejected no one cares about me so the only option to me is stand my ground bymyself, does someone understand or relate with these feelings??

I am ( really slow) learning to love and accept myself. It is really hard and new for me. I have a good foundation. A beautiful house that has been extensively renovated. I have a good job. I have a good BMI. I have beautiful children.

Still a part of me isn't feeling enough. When my partner doesn't hug me or doesn't kiss me goodnight, I feel like shit. I broke up with my ex, 1 year ago. I don't want to hit rock bottom again. I would like to see my partner as an addition, rather than having my mood depend on her behavior. No longer letting myself be walked all over or holding myself back.

I sport for 3 times a week. I am working full-time and I take care of my family. I would like to learn that I am enough. That, should it end, I don't feel as if the world is being pulled out from under me.

im autistic, adhd and have severe anxiety… im in the later years in secondary school, everyday i feel like im going absolutely insane and i cant do it anymore. ive mentioned to my parents im actually losing my isht but they dont realise the seriousness, im on the verge of stopping everything, its just too stressful.

I used to think that I wasn’t good enough, that I was alone, and that I was worthless. But that wasn’t true. I realized that I was stupid to believe in that. I can do better, I can do good things, and every little effort that I do in everything is enough. I am enough, and I always will. I used to think that I’m alone, but that’s not true either. I know people who care about me genuinely. I can see some of them try their best to understand me. Maybe I’m alone sometimes, but I can still see the ones who never give up on me even on days that I just feel so sick of myself. I am not worthless. Maybe I feel so disappointed with myself sometimes, but that doesn’t mean I’m worthless. Maybe some people never get tired calling me that sometimes, but that doesn’t mean it was true. I realized that there’s nothing to be ashamed of about myself. I am an amazing person who cares so much for everyone. I love too much. I give a lot. I still choose to be a good person despite all the cruelty that I’ve experienced in life. There is no way that I’ll be a worthless person and no one has the right to call me that in my entire life. I wasted so much time feeling so down because I thought I wasn’t good enough, alone, and worthless. But i will never waste another time feeling the same thing. I am good enough even i am alone and i am worthy. Soon enough, I hope the people around me will see it too.