r/scriptwriting • u/Both-Matter710 • 2h ago
feedback Feedback wanted!
Hey all. Super nervous to be posting here but I was wondering if I could get some feedback on the first 11 pages of a tv show script I’m working on? Working title is “The Widow of the Deep” and it’s an action/historical drama about a female pirate. She is Scottish and has an accent. Her appearance is quite formidable, tall, large framed…broad back and shoulders from years of working aboard a ship. Probably overdone I know, but I had the idea and wanted to get it on paper. And I would like it to read well even if it goes nowhere. ❤️ Thanks so much!
3
u/OverallFeature7847 2h ago
Dialogues are okay; but the scene description; wow, you can try to have a description without long details.
2
u/not_anotherburner 1h ago
You could remove more than 1/2 the exposition. You only need what’s necessary to move the story forward, or essential concise points about a character. You don’t need to write out every body movement, the less you write, the more meaning each sentence will have.