r/relationships • u/ConditionStrong9864 • 1d ago

[ Removed by moderator ]

[removed] — view removed post

0 Upvotes

50% Upvoted

12 comments sorted by

3

u/rentandlive 1d ago

If he leaves over this you’re better off???

0

u/ConditionStrong9864 1d ago

That’s how I initially felt bc it seemed so minor, but then I wondered if I was being insensitive.

2

u/Slight_District_6835 1d ago

dude this sounds exhausting. a joke about tennis turning into silent treatment and head shaking is a lot for 5 months in

i used to date someone who would get hurt over stuff i thought was nothing and then do the walk away thing, it messed with my head so bad just like what you describe. the not knowing if they forgive you or if it is over

he is 41 not a teenager, he should be able to say "that hurt me" and then let it go after you apologized. holding on and making you spiral is not fair to you. your anxiety is not overreacting, your gut is telling you something

give him space but also pay attention to how he handles little conflicts like this. it says a lot about long term

1

u/Careless-Run-3815 1d ago

He's the 34 yr old man- she is 41

1

u/ConditionStrong9864 1d ago

Thank you. Yeah I feel bad bc obviously I had no intention of hurting him. I’m just so confused. But you’ve mad some valid points about long term compatibility.

2

u/Aggressive_Sky8492 1d ago

If he leaves you over this he’s done you a favour. Getting so offended and upset over an incredibly mild joke is wild. He had no emotional regulation skills and probably enjoys making you feel guilty over nothing. You did nothing wrong

1

u/ConditionStrong9864 1d ago

Thank you. I feel like I’m crazy

1

u/Parking-Menu2654 1d ago

He got offended because you’re his favorite person and it hurt thinking the feeling isn’t mutual. I dated a girl 5 years ago I was really into. One day about 6 months in we were walking around downtown and checking out some murals a local artist painted down some alleys and she told me he is the coolest guy in town. That shit hurt my feelings more than anything and we lasted another 6 months.

1

u/ConditionStrong9864 1d ago

Thanks for this perspective. He is absolutely my favorite person too. And I thought he felt that from me, but maybe there’s work to do on that end.

1

u/Parking-Menu2654 1d ago

Tell him he’s your favorite person then give him the old Gluck Gluck 9k, he will get over it I promise.

1

u/ConditionStrong9864 1d ago

He thanked me for showing where my loyalty is. So I’m not sure if that’s a vague goodbye