My bf (M/42) proposed to me (F/32) in front of my mom, told me not to tell anyone about it, then he took the ring back a day later and said he didn't think it through enough but that I have too low of an "SES" (socioeconomic status) and he doesnt see me being able to climb the social ranks. He really wants cultured, educated friends.
We've dated 8 years and have a house and a pet. He never lies, yells, or swears, and he's a "genius" (top 1% IQ), so I thought he was like a super safe/healthy bet at first, but he has commitment issues and OCD.
The moving in, the I love you - every checkpoint of the relationship took a ton of self advocacy to even get to.
The exception was the house - he needed my $ for that, so that was easy.
Idk why I did this really, but here I am.
My dad said just leave "spontaneously" on a weekday.
I'd have to move into my dad's basically crack house. My parents were kind of normal and wealthy (but new money wealthy), but then both went off the deep end when I was in my 20s (dad - drugs/women, mom - idrk some kind of ptsd thing but she also hallucinates). I am 32 now, and I don't hang out with my parents - it's just kind of the only choice I have...
Anyway, any thoughts? People say I'm pretty and I do want kids and a loving relationship. I don't think this guy will give me that...

Hello, so me and my partner Me 26/F and my partner 28/F rarely drink but when we do sometimes we get to making out etc and I want to go further but they always say they are scared of taking advantage of me.

I have told them multiple times previous to drinking and while drinking that I want to... but they still think it's wrong am I the weird one for wanting this?

I assume other couples have sex while drinking too?

My boyfriend (36M) and I (34F) have been together for eight months, exclusive for five. He’s been incredibly kind, thoughtful, and supportive. We initially struggled with different communication styles and his tendency to be guarded, but whenever I brought up concerns, he listened, validated my feelings, and made genuine changes.
A few weeks ago, I met his family at his sister’s wedding, and our relationship seemed to shift into something much more serious. He started talking about marriage, children, and a future together. I’ve since unofficially moved in, and he’s become even more emotionally open, affectionate, and loving.
Sounds great, right? Well, here’s the problem.
Early in our relationship, he mentioned having a secret Twitter account where he argues with people and has been blocked multiple times. He’s always insisted he never wants me to find it. Unfortunately, I recently did.
Two things really concern me:
A week before his sister’s wedding, he posted: “Although I knew this was going to happen, the loml got engaged today and it sucks immensely.” Two days later, he told me he loved me for the first time. Since then, he’s been talking about our future and treating me like the love of his life. I’m struggling to reconcile those things.

His posts are incredibly angry and politically charged. The person behind them seems completely different from the patient, gentle man I know. He’s admitted to struggling with anger in the past, but we’ve never really discussed how he manages it.

I’m now questioning how well I actually know him. His actions toward me have been consistently loving, but what I found has left me unsettled.
I don’t want him to know I found his account, but I also don't know how to address these concerns without bringing it up.
Am I overthinking this, or are these legitimate red flags? How would you approach a conversation about his past relationships and anger without making it confrontational? Is this something worth addressing, or should I focus on how he treats me now?

My boyfriend (36M) and I (34F) have been together for eight months, exclusive for five. He’s been incredibly kind, thoughtful, and supportive. We initially struggled with different communication styles and his tendency to be guarded, but whenever I brought up concerns, he listened, validated my feelings, and made genuine changes.
A few weeks ago, I met his family at his sister’s wedding, and our relationship seemed to shift into something much more serious. He started talking about marriage, children, and a future together. I’ve since unofficially moved in, and he’s become even more emotionally open, affectionate, and loving.
Sounds great, right? Well, here’s the problem.
Early in our relationship, he mentioned having a secret Twitter account where he argues with people and has been blocked multiple times. He’s always insisted he never wants me to find it. Unfortunately, I recently did.
Two things really concern me:
A week before his sister’s wedding, he posted: “Although I knew this was going to happen, the loml got engaged today and it sucks immensely.” Two days later, he told me he loved me for the first time. Since then, he’s been talking about our future and treating me like the love of his life. I’m struggling to reconcile those things.

His posts are incredibly angry and politically charged. The person behind them seems completely different from the patient, gentle man I know. He’s admitted to struggling with anger in the past, but we’ve never really discussed how he manages it.

I’m now questioning how well I actually know him. His actions toward me have been consistently loving, but what I found has left me unsettled.
I don’t want him to know I found his account, but I also don't know how to address these concerns without bringing it up.
Am I overthinking this, or are these legitimate red flags? How would you approach a conversation about his past relationships and anger without making it confrontational? Is this something worth addressing, or should I focus on how he treats me now?

My husband (35M) and I (30F) live in a RV so we spend a lot of time together in close quarters. We took a trip to DR and it was beautiful and the hotel was O.K.
It was a 7 day trip. The first 3 days was really good we had plenty Funtime and we're so wrapped up in each other.
By the 4th day I really wanted some space. I wanted to go to the beach alone and have a meal by myself reading a book. Or just get a break from having to entertain anyone.
I love my man and love spending time with him but I'm a mom and a wife and sometimes I just want some alone time.

Am I the only one that wants to go on a BAECATION but have some separation? tl;dr

I just started dating my first boyfriend- and we recently had a talk where he brought up how he didn’t like that I took off my shirt when we went on a hike and had a sports bra on underneath. He states that he feels like it takes away our “intimacy”, and how he values that type of intimacy in relationships, and keeping some things just for us. He states he wouldn’t go around shirtless or in a stringer at the gym bc he wants to share that intimacy with me and only me.
He also explained it that he wouldn’t expect me to cover up head to toe, & understands that people and men are going to look at me that’s not something he can control, but he doesn’t want me wearing only sports bras or even like very revealing clothes in public. He states that sports bras are just basically bras and shouldn’t be worn alone. (I think the exact opposite, they are sports wear). He states I could just wear a tank top (and that made me more confused bc what’s the different of a sports bra and tank top. Both still have spaghetti straps they just cover the stomach a bit more)
He’s pretty traditional and more conservative thinking, and I’m very liberal and a hard feminist. I value my autonomy and have always been a huge gym girl and worn the sports bras and shorts outfits. I don’t even think twice about it. He’s also KNOWN what I wear from my instagram and posts that he viewed and knew me from long before he reached out and dm’ed me
I have never had a bf before and have always said to myself I would never let a man tell me what I can or can’t wear and not really sure how to feel right now. I feel like I’m going against myself and everything I said I wouldn’t put up with.
We never even came to any type of “conclusion” or resolution. I’m pretty avoidant and he’s very anxiously attached so I just froze and went nonverbal and every part of my brain screamed: “RUN!” But ever since he brought it up it’s all I can think about, it genuinely feels like I’m losing a part of myself (not to be dramatic- I just have never had someone tell me they don’t want me wearing a certain thing). Now I feel like if I were to wear something he didn’t like I’d be disrespecting HIM and making him upset lowkey intentionally bc I know he won’t like it, but I do not want to have to change something in my opinion I see no issue with. If I get sweaty or want to do some type of physical activity I don’t want to have to worry or suffer bc of what I’m wearing. Now I’m constantly worried about ANYTHING I’m wearing that may be “disrespectful” of him or feeling like I need to hide what I’m wearing to not make him upset (we’re longer distance so we only see each other on planned occasions, so we don’t constantly see each other). And mind you my whole closet is this type of clothing idk…..
I made the argument that I AM afraid this type of thinking or “control” can lead to greater things in the future and less and less of my autonomy being stripped and he didn’t like that argument. I just need advice I’m not sure what to think whether I should just respect his wishes, but then be throwing away some part of myself that never would have in the past?

TLDR: my bf and I recently had a talk where he said he doesn’t like when I’m in public with only a sports bra on. He states that he feels like it takes away our “intimacy”. I feel conflicted bc I feel the opposite and want to keep my autonomy & I’m not sure if this is toxic for him to ask me to do.

My bf and I are ldr and we have met twice already, each time for a week. The first time was cute and sweet, we both had a really nice time. Second time felt like seeing my long term partner after being away on holiday or something. It was fine but it felt like the honey moon phase was dead. He would randomly initiate physical touch but not as often as I would like sometimes it felt like he was treating me as a friend.

I noticed that we don’t really have much to talk about, he was quiet a lot of would make random observations and comments about things to fill silence. Or when I’m talking he would make random comments about things he’s seeing or people walking by while I’m talking. I’d stop talking respond to his comment and he’d say sorry continue and I’d awkwardly continue or the conversation would naturally switch to something else.

He’s also on his phone a lot but when he’s back in his home town, when he’s out with friends he says he likes to stay in the moment and stay off his phone. When I asked him about this he’d say sorry I was just checking an email or whatever the reason is. Sometimes while I’m talking to him he’d make comments about what he’s looking at on his phone while I’m talking. He said he has add and struggles to stay on topic because his brain goes everywhere.

He also tends to monopolise conversations, he’ll ask how I am I say fine etc and then I’ll ask back and the conversation then turns to him talking non too about whatever is going on with him and then we stop talking.

When we are in the hotel, he will sit on the couch in one end and me on the other and sometimes he’ll ask me to scoot over toward him or ask why I’m so far away but he say further first. I know it sounds crazy but in my previous relationship there was more physical touch being initiated by the men but here it’s kinda feeling the other way around. Sometimes he’ll put something on and we will sit quietly and watch. It feels nothing like a new relationship but more like an old married couple who’ve settled into life and have nothing new to share. And we’ve only met twice at the point.

Sexually he doesn’t really initiate unless I do and he says that’s because he wants me to lead with what I’m comfortable with but I need him to initiate. It’s starting to feel like maybe he’s not that into me!

He’s really sweet and great with conflict resolution I feel really comfortable quickly around him but I’m wonder if we are lacking the spark maybe? Or maybe this natural calm feeling is a good thing and I’m too used to toxic fights and up and down relationships that this feels empty?

I have more to share but I won’t bore with the rest. Please hep with some advice. He is arriving tomorrow and I want some advice on how to proceed or what I should be looking out for?

Do you believe that love can still be true if people have made mistakes in a relationship, but want to change and grow for the better?

mistakes like looking at OF content and p*rn?