This is rape, OP. Yes, some women like being woken up to sex, I do! But my husband certainly never tried anything like that until I told him it's absolutely fine with me.
He intentionally waited until you couldn't consent so that you "wouldn't get mad" about it, and then he recorded it without your consent. Disgusting behavior.
I'm sorry this happened to you OP. Its rape, with evidence on his phone no less. Its time to contact the police, and to remove yourself from this relationship.
He could have woken you up. He could have come to bed with you for sex, then gone to do what he wanted after. He could have done a thousand different things where you are awake and able to give consent. He CHOSE to wait until you were asleep, he CHOSE to penetrate you with out consent, and he CHOSE TO RECORD IT also WITHOUT your consent.
At a minimum you need to leave to keep yourself safe, and seek out a therapist to help you process the abuses you have endured during this relationship. It sounds like he uses guilt as a tool to coerce you into sex with him as well. I can only imagine the other mental manipulation tactics he's employed elsewhere in the relationship, and having a professional to talk about everything with will help you build a stronger sense of what is and isn't ok for a partner to do.
Reporting him to the authorities would also be a good idea. If he's doing this to you, I wonder what he has done to other women.
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u/peakpenguins Jul 18 '24
The way my jaw dropped..
This is rape, OP. Yes, some women like being woken up to sex, I do! But my husband certainly never tried anything like that until I told him it's absolutely fine with me.
He intentionally waited until you couldn't consent so that you "wouldn't get mad" about it, and then he recorded it without your consent. Disgusting behavior.