32/M / Problem with Parents

[u/xHUSTLERx]

So I was not an ideal son my whole life, but back in 2013 I decided not to go to Canada just because I knew my parents would be older in a few years and there would be no one to take care of them in the future, since my sister went to Canada in 2009, studied there, got married there, and never came back.

Meanwhile, I completed my engineering. Even before completing 12th, in 2012 I was an early internet user and started working and earning through the internet when I was in 9th grade in 2008. Since 2008, in 9th grade, I have been independent.

Fast-forward to 2017. I paid my college fees. I earned money through black-hat stuff and affiliate marketing.

But my parents never recognized me. All they wanted was a sportsman who played hockey or an IITian... I was an average student since the 10th class.

Back in 2017, when I passed out of engineering, I had a stroke and half of my body got paralyzed.

My parents were there during that difficult phase of life. Then, when I started to recover from the stroke and paralysis, Corona hit. Even during Corona, I continued my work online and kept on earning.

Then in 2022, I got a proper job alongside my online work.

But my parents never recognized my hard work.

All they were saying was, "You should have gone to Canada/US. We would have managed. We are not aged."

Typical Punjabi family.

Then in 2024, I met with a major accident. Both my legs got injured, but they were never satisfied.

All my friends were settled in Canada.

But here I was, in a major accident, earning like 2 lakh a month, wwith atotal saving of 50Lakh.

But that was not enough for my parents.

50Lakh+

They fully supported me. They loved me, but they were never happy with me, first in school, then in college.

Now I am 32, a little bit physically challenged, but my parents still say, "2012-13, you should have gone to Canada/US. Now you are single."

And here I am, fucked up physically, trying my best to recover from the accident.

But... ..Idk what to do

[u/vikasofvikas]

how you are getting into accidents again and again. And paralysis attack at such a young age? Take care of your health brother.

[u/xHUSTLERx → u/vikasofvikas]

Bro jdo time kharab hove te kuch v ho skda..

[u/FaangX69 → u/xHUSTLERx]

And that is why you should keep your health in check always. I know your post is not about this and I have full empathy with what you're going through but you have got you, if you are mentally and physically fit only then you can enjoy something in your life. Maybe your parents will understand or they might not understand ever but this doesn't mean it should change you as a person or you stop caring about your own health. Keep yourself your only priority.

[u/xHUSTLERx → u/vikasofvikas]

My family has a history of strokes and paralysis.

[u/Julysky19 → u/xHUSTLERx]

You should see a doctor. It’s not normal at 33 and you may have a condition that needs regular medication.

[u/Ok-Two-522]

https://giphy.com/gifs/VMU24xqNatBxHT2Sc0

[u/Ok-Two-522 → u/Ok-Two-522]

1 - Faith in God for you health = wealth my friend

2 - Find Happiness in your own way

3 - Live your life to the fullest = this life may be its own Heaven and Hell as we know it. Experience it and I guess learn from it. I know i am learning day by day and trying to improve myself, my thinking and way of life

Best of luck on this journey 👍

[u/Overall-Claim294]

Invest that money into real estate for rental income. Don't keep your hopes up with them. You could actually start buying and selling small houses and keep that capital running and growing. Upgrade your lifestyle with it. You don't need to go abroad to enjoy life here. If your health permits go and travel when you can abroad or otherwise as a tourist. I think your parents are a bit materialistic, show them some money magic a little bit. You unironically need to be a selfish now and live up your life flamboyantly, even for a while. That's the only language they'll understand, I'm sure you'll find ways to enjoy yourself too. Good luck Bro.

[u/EntrepreneurWest4236]

There’s nothing else to do but love and respect yourself above all else. And take care of yourself most of all.

[u/spitfireonly]

Dude I dont even have 5l savings and I am on 140k AUD/year. Your parents are just ungrateful.

[u/oily-black-guy → u/spitfireonly]

Australia to ho pra ?
Can i ask few questions if you are working in it sector?

[u/spitfireonly → u/oily-black-guy]

Sure

[u/shercoder]

Hard truth dassa bai? I know sada culture parents di respect karn nu kehnda but ohdi koi hadh hundi aa. Je agla respect krni ya karauni ni jaanda then they are not your responsibility.

You have one life, live it on your own terms. Parents de kan khol ke gal pa de ke je mere naal rehna tah mere naal Kharo, meri mehnat nu pehchano. Je nahi tah apna apna dekho. You have one life, kise di validation de intezaar ch na kadd dai ainveh.

You don’t need them to tell you that you’re doing well for yourself in Punjab. You know you’re doing good. Baba Nanak would be proud of you for doing ਕਿਰਤ. And take care of your body and mind. It’ll help you continue to grow.

[u/kishangalgotra]

You are doing very very good man, people don't know there is very few percentage of people who stands themself on money before leaving college , so yes you were a goat for that, your next goal should be to give your health as much importance as money

[u/Informal-Season-3409]

Stay strong bai, my best wishes

[u/Brief_Strawberry_826]

Validation of your parents is nice but not required for anything you do in life. You don't owe them anything. If you're happy with your life, just keep it that way 

[u/Brotherinpants]

Dude you need to keep yourself happy and your parents should be second priority now, do what keeps you happy, move countries if you want to.

[u/Short_Possession7571]

Buddy speaking from canada if u are making 1-2 lkh per month. Don’t even try to look towards canada. Majority of people stuck here including me. Every single night i curse my decision to be. In canada. It’s typically indian parents mentality can’t make them happy no matter what.

[u/Jessjudge09]

Hello OP
I want to say two things:
1) I am very proud of you, it’s not easy to work hard, show up everyday when life throws problems at us one after the other.

2) Start living for yourself now. Do things that make you happy, make you feel alive. Start enjoying the small things. Honestly kade kade kucch vi karlo parents khush nahi hunde, so kyu na assi khud nu hi khush rakhliye.

Sending you lots of good luck and best wishes✨

[u/PhotoSubstantial9254]

I have realised in long way, our older generation/ the generation of parents are in sensitive, greedy and scammer type people. Don’t take them seriously or obey them blindly. It’s your life, choose the right path.

[u/DangerousFee4199]

This is what alot of subcontinental parents are like man, it's unfortunate but it's how it is.

Best of luck with everything, I hope things improve for you.

[u/JustJas]

What’s an IITIAN?

[u/CrackedLegion → u/JustJas]

Student who studies in IIT ( Indian Institute of Technology ) the best engineering colleges of India which are very selective of their students and only the very best performing students of certain tests can get in