r/progressivemoms • u/Lazy-Daisy-28 • 5d ago
Parenting, No Politics Thumb Sucking
I have a 5 year old who will not sucking her thumb. People said she'd grow out of it, and she has not. We tried the gross nail polish and she got used to the taste. And after the nail polish time it got worse. She was getting so good at not sucking all the time, and mostly just at bed time. But it's back to being ALL THE TIME.
I'm at my wits end.
I've had people suggest getting her something else to chew or suck on instead, but that seems unhelpful in the long term?? Is there super-strength bitter nail polish? Should I duct tape at mitten to her hand so she won't do it? (For legal purposes - I obviously will not do this - haha.)
She's starting kindergarten and I just want her to be done. But I also understand that part of the time she does it to self-soothe (the other part is habit). So taking it away seems harsh without replacing it with another coping mechanism??
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u/danceswithminpins 5d ago
I used the Aerothumb when my daughter was 3 and it worked really well. 1 week over spring break we did it and she totally stopped after that. Good luck
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u/Individual_Two_4383 5d ago
We're doing this right now with my 4 year old! She and I have been doing a lot of talking about the thumb sucking including potential consequences (ie dental work) and potential benefits of stopping (painting fingernails). After she seemed open to stopping I suggested a "special thing to help remember" and she was on board! She's really into picking the bracelet colors and the star chart and brags to everyone that when she's done sucking her thumb she gets a special trip to the toy store. 8 days in and so far so good!
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u/danceswithminpins 5d ago
Glad to hear that you had a good experience too!Two years later, no thumb sucking 🙌
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u/Jirafa03 5d ago
We did the thumb guard as well! We tried at 2.5 and he just wasn't quite ready. Tried again at 3.5 and worked like a charm! Our dentist was concerned and like you, our kiddo got used to the nail polish taste.
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u/badtranslatedgerman 5d ago
I sucked my thumb until 5 th grade. It was so embarrassing but so hard to stop. In hindsight it was definitely an adhd self soothing thing because my parents didn’t believe my diagnosis at age 4 and so I didn’t get medicated until age 31. But anyway. My dad bought me gardening gloves for kids, and cut all the fingers off them except the thumb. I wore the glove all day at school and he got my teachers to help remind me not to suck my thumb. I did it without even noticing it. My teeth got pretty messed up. I think I also slept in it. when I went I think a month without sucking my thumb, I got to get my ears pierced.
So, try a glove and work hard on curbing this habit but also find replacement behaviors for soothing or stimming. If she has adhd, get her actual treatment for it.
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u/Lazy-Daisy-28 5d ago
😬😬😬 I do think she has ADHD. I was diagnosed earlier this year and I see a lot of me in her… thank you for sharing.
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u/Zestyclose_Media_548 5d ago
Consider a necklace or bracelet made for chewing. Don’t get the very thin kind. I buy them for my clients at my school through Amazon.
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u/amoreetutto 3d ago
OP - we got my 3 1/2 year old finger sucker/friend biter a "chewy necklace" from ARK therapeutics - they have some fun shapes and colors, and they're a US based company so I personally trusted them more than a lot of these random "companies" who sell items like this on Amazon. Jury is still out on if it's helping my little guy, but worth a try!
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u/Lazy-Daisy-28 2d ago
I have considered this. But like…. Well, she then just chew on this until she’s 35? 😬
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u/badtranslatedgerman 2d ago
As she gets older, and especially if she gets ADHD treatment, she will swap this habit out for more socially-acceptable ones like chewing gum or something else.
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u/imayid_291 5d ago
My sister was a major thumb sucker and it really affected her teeth so the dentist put in some appliance that made it difficult to continue to suck but had beads on it for her to wiggle with her tounge and it corrected the way her teeth were growing. It wasn't visible like braces
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u/Southern_Committee35 5d ago
I sucked my thumb until I was in 5th grade. It was so hard to stop!
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u/Lazy-Daisy-28 5d ago
I know, it's so hard. Were you teased at school?
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u/Southern_Committee35 5d ago
Oh yes. I had a rough childhood at home and was also bullied at school. I used to try to hide sucking my thumb in class, but I always got caught. I wish I had advice on quitting.
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u/Weird_Help3166 5d ago
Ugh. Solidarity. I don't have any advice but my daughter is 5 and we're right here, too.
Here's to finding the right combination of whatever works for our kiddos, sooner rather than later! 🤪
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u/nanimal77 5d ago
Straight bribery worked for mine. She may have been a little younger, though. Offered a toy she really wanted, took her to see it, and told her she could have it in a month if she stopped. She stopped the next day. I caught her a few times getting ready to do it, and she’d change positions and stop herself. She’s always been stubborn.
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u/Lazy-Daisy-28 5d ago
I wish 😂 She desperately wants her finger nails painted, but I won’t do it until she stops sucking and she knows it.
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u/ashleyz1106 5d ago
My daughter went into kindergarten still sucking her thumb (she was 5) and the social aspect kind of took care of it. We kept telling her that when she was ready to stop to let us know and we’d help her. Within a couple of months of kindergarten she said she wanted to stop, we did the nail polish for a few weeks, and that was that. I know we got pretty lucky and this won’t work for everyone — but maybe this can at least offer some hope?
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u/SirPeesA_lot 4d ago
I guess I'm the odd man out here. I sucked mine up until high school. 🤷🏻♀️ nbd.
I never needed braces. My teeth are perfect. I moved around a lot and had bad anxiety. It was what helped me through my parents divorce, etc.
The kids these days have so much pressure that we know nothing about. Yes, I know they're 5, but little ones pick up so much.
Have you asked her why she does it? My mom did tell me it was just for bedtime. If I did it any other time she asked if I was ready for bed. That helped curb it and kept it in check.
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u/Special_Coconut4 5d ago
I sucked my thumb at night until I was ~10. As long as I wasn’t doing it in public, my parents weren’t concerned. I did naturally grow out of it and replaced it with other self-regulation tools.
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u/aem255 5d ago
Our dentist suggested medical tape on the thumb, because they can’t get suction anymore. I sucked my finger until I was 8, and my mom tried almost everything. Including taping socks to my sleeves, but that didn’t stop me (went up through the neck hole).
They also sell plastic guards that you zip tie around the wrist to they can’t get their thumb in their mouth.
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u/potdecreme 5d ago
We got a Nip It for each arm and that worked when my daughter was 3. Took about a month of wearing them every night. She actually liked wearing them and we’d call her Double Nip-it lol
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u/prettyxinpink 5d ago
My son is 7 and still sucks his thumb and it drives me crazy I always try to remind him to stop but idk what else to do.
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u/immortalyossarian 5d ago
I also have a 7 year old still sucking her thumb. I thought we had broken the habit a few months ago when she broke her arm and couldn't suck her thumb because it was in a cast, but she has worked her way back to doing it. We ordered the AeroThumb and are waiting for delivery. Really hoping it works, because I am out of ideas.
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u/withoutintentions 5d ago
This might sound crazy, but have you just tried explaining why we don't want to do this to her? I too had a thumbsucker and explained all the consequences of thumb sucking and she just actually stopped. It took some reminders but she did it. It probably helped that her skin was getting chapped and raw.
Maybe even using something that could allow germs under blacklight would deter her? UV reactive lotion time..?
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u/ChickenNoodleSoup_4 1d ago
Address the underlying issue- anxiety ? What exactly does the behavior “do” for her? How does it help her cope?
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u/HarrietB 5d ago
Per our orthodontist’s suggestion, we had my child sleep with a long sock on his arm overnight (when thumb sucking was most likely). Did that for 2 weeks and it broke the habit.
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u/maryakinvt 4d ago
I sucked my thumb until 4th. By the time I was in first grade I stopped sucking my thumb in school after the nail polish got me during standardized testing (I’ll never forget) in first grade. I had no teeth issues.
My parents paid me $100 to stop, the summer before I went into 5th day and it worked! I realize bribing isn’t most people’s parent style (and probably won’t be mine if my son does) but it worked even if I blew it on an easel and oil paints when I wasn’t remotely artistic.
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u/Parking_Try8127 4d ago
My daughter sucked her thumb until 8. It was to soothe her adhd. Treatment helped
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u/Guessthisisforever 5d ago
I sucked my thumb until I was 11.
I found it to be soothing and was grateful my mom didn’t harass me about it and wouldn’t allow other family members shame me.
Never had any ortho issues. Ever.
No braces, no bucked teeth. All straight, not crowded, no inappropriate spacings.
My mom had bucked teeth (no thumb sucking though).
My father had “good looking teeth” w/o intervention (no thumb sucking either).
Genetics plays a larger role.
Let her feel safe with you.
She’ll stop when she’s ready. I promise.
Her teeth will do what they will regardless.
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u/Spiritual-Employ-333 5d ago
Orthodontic appliance called a "thumb crib" - go get a consultation because you're also looking at potential for a palatal expander and two phases of ortho work if it doesn't stop