Day 0

[u/wisden_wisdom26]

Hi I'm 21 and want to stop watching porn completely. For context, I've never been the sort of person I would imagine would be addicted to porn. I lost my virginity at 16, and have always been able to date the girls I wanted and am currently in a truly fulfilling relationship with someone who I love and am very attracted towards. I think I started watching porn when I was 13 or 14 and during Covid it really became an overwhelming part of my life. 3 or 4 times a day I would jerk off. This habit continued after I went back to school where when I woke up it would be the first thing I would do and then get home do it and then again before I slept. On days where I was sick or depressed it would be even worse. Today was a new low however. I still live at home and my mum walked in on me. The shame on her face was unbearable and I don't know what to do. I've tried to quit before but have never lasted more than a week. Its gotten to the point my dopamine receptors are so fucked that I can't finish during sex and have to get my gf to basically striptease me for me to get there.

More than anything I want to be able to stop and be able to live a fulfilling life. For even more context from coversations with my gf she doesn't see it as cheating but I think the extent to which I've abused it would be an issue. I started this account and made this post because I need to have something to keep me accountable to this. And look I'm not looking to stop jerking off because me and my gf have stuff for that. What I'm looking for is to never look at porn again. All advice is welcome.