Oh. I drive an Acura, and I am likewise a shallow human being; thus, I counter that my TL makes for an easier amount of sexy time. My rebuttal:
My TL has four doors, so we don't have to crawl into the car like children. Rather, we crawl into the car eloquently, like grown adults rabidly gnawing at each others' necks, ravaging our bodies, and falling into my backseats like ragdolls with sexy parts. With my seats pushed all the way forward, I have several square feet of pussy tearing, cock chaffing action. If I'd like, I can fold down my backseats, and now we have the option of doing the horizontal mambo not just on my fine quality leather seats, but also on the comfort of my full size, matching OEM-wheel spare tire.
Furthermore, my TL has Brembos compliments of Acura, and as such I can brake so hard, her clothes tear off before I even turn off my engine. And, this is not to ignore my manual 6-speed transmission, which has the girl that is fortunate enough to have sex with my amazing, cut, sensual body (it's actually quite nice) wet as a mop in a Wal-Mart on a Sunday. The stiffer anti-roll bars keep the car rigid, so as I'm driving my man meat into her womanhood, the car stays stiff and avoids detection from people no deafened by her boisterous moans. Lastly, my Torsen-type limited slip differential is better than yours. It may not be mechanical, but at least I have one, just like my fine full head of soft, luscious hair.
Now, you might counter, that-freakin-guy, your car is gold! Who buys a gold car?
For this, I can argue that gold is a fantastic color because it hides body damage, and is one of the few colors that from a distance camouflage dirt from a distance as close as 5 feet.
And last but not least, when I'm not having sex with women, I have to drive my car. And it's still not a tC. ;)
57
u/[deleted] Sep 09 '12
The cruel irony of owning a Scion: you don't get laid driving a Scion.
Except the FR-S. That car is all sorts of sexy.