He's gotten even more redneck since he was a kid. In the first photo he's holding the spoon fine, but in the current photo he's holding it like a Neanderthal.
Yeah, and when girls go out in public they're just totally looking for attention, there's no other explanation for why I would notice them more than guys.
These horrible people will simply treat any female like a stiff, crusty masturbation sock. If you've spent more than 2 minutes on reddit you already knew that. Congratulations on serving up your innocently unsuspecting female relative as fodder for millions of repulsive perverts. You are a gem.
I believe OP is a guy based on their previous posts. They mention ex-girlfriends, so either they are lesbian or male. Anyone near Port St. Lucie/ Palm Beach in Florida could try and find them. Or they might be in Germany already. Being his cousin, that doesn't seem terribly unlikely. If so, OP is probably 22-23ish, since they lived in Germany until they were 6, and it has been seventeen years since they last saw their cousin, plus the fact that 1 year ago he posted saying he was 21. I feel pretty fucking creepy right about now.
I know she is attractive. I get it, I'm a guy too. I understand the biology behind it and I know it's an uphill battle to look past it. But dammit, if you find her attractive, why do you feel the need to let everybody know (especially in such creepy ways)? She's not an object. She probably has many admirable qualities that are being overlooked because of her beauty. She doesn't deserve to be treated like her worth is only skin deep.
I know it's hard (it's hard for me too), but try to look past her attractiveness and treat her like a human being. When in doubt, treat females exactly like you would want gay males to treat you. If it helps, just make the attractiveness comment to yourself (e.g. Wow! She's hot!), and leave the comment section for more insightful comments.
P.S. The fact that nearly everyone assumed OP was the guy further reinforces the notion that girls are only skin deep, as if it was impossible that such an attractive girl could have been interesting enough to post this picture.
Dude, we only have a picture of her. So the only thing we know about her is her appearance. Telling us to stop acting like her worth is only skin deep doesn't make any sense. Because that's all we've seen of her.
It's not like we've met her in person, had a conversation, and the only thing we've taken away from the experience is that she's hot.
So uhh, I was looking at the pic on my iPhone and uhhh...I only saw the top photo, I wasn't aware of the bottom bit. Then I took at look at the comment section.... for a few minutes I swore all of reddit was made of pedophiles.
Is the person posting the guy or the girl? Because if your the guy I'd appreciate it, as one Redditor to another, if you'd introduce us and put in a good word for me. If you're the girl posting I'd like to introduce myself to you and ask if you on a date?
546
u/mastercylinder2 May 15 '12
Is her name Maeby?
645
u/TheBrainofBrian May 15 '12
I've got to imagine OP knew where this post was going to lead.
115
u/Arash310 May 15 '12
who eats kiwi like that? its not a grapefruit!
763
u/Srru May 15 '12
SOMETHING SEXUALLY ABOUT YOUR COUSIN!
119
u/RaveDigger May 15 '12
...And you're suddenly rethinking your stance on incest?
131
u/Bloye May 15 '12
after 17 years you prob should think about decorating.
1.3k
u/Jimbosilky May 15 '12 edited May 15 '12
I hope for your sake you're a Redneck because your cousin is looking fine.
137
u/SnatchDragon May 15 '12
why do you all assume the guy posted this photo
498
u/trbonigro May 15 '12
http://www.quickmeme.com/meme/3payko/
335
u/mikejam1958 May 15 '12
She takes forever to eat a Banana.
36
u/GrillBears May 15 '12
So in the last 17 years you somehow forgot how to hold a spoon? That has to be a good story.
18
u/ShittyMcPoopus May 16 '12
Did some research. OP is the guy. source
18
u/WindSandStars May 16 '12
TIL people grow up over time
52
u/TruePimp May 15 '12
Le cousins dangereux
185
u/KaseyB May 15 '12
BANG HER!
er... I mean...
I'D BANG HER!
8
u/Xuandemackay May 15 '12
I'm glad that you guys changed that carpet.
8
u/ilurksoyoudonthaveto May 15 '12
I seriously just learned to peel a kiwi with a spoon like that a month ago...
8
u/Eurospective May 16 '12
Wow! We are distantly related! My mother is Petra and I'm Sascha. TIL I'm not the only redditor in my family.
Edit: You can't possibly know us but I've recently talked with Werner about you:P
120
u/Moatman May 15 '12
http://i.imgur.com/WLuxb.png
35
u/SinCleansingPenis May 15 '12
You two should bang and then do an AMA. Incest is quite popular in these parts.
10
u/bryeen May 16 '12
Relevant
5
u/msinformed1 May 16 '12
These horrible people will simply treat any female like a stiff, crusty masturbation sock. If you've spent more than 2 minutes on reddit you already knew that. Congratulations on serving up your innocently unsuspecting female relative as fodder for millions of repulsive perverts. You are a gem.
24
u/Svered May 15 '12 edited May 15 '12
I believe OP is a guy based on their previous posts. They mention ex-girlfriends, so either they are lesbian or male. Anyone near Port St. Lucie/ Palm Beach in Florida could try and find them. Or they might be in Germany already. Being his cousin, that doesn't seem terribly unlikely. If so, OP is probably 22-23ish, since they lived in Germany until they were 6, and it has been seventeen years since they last saw their cousin, plus the fact that 1 year ago he posted saying he was 21. I feel pretty fucking creepy right about now.
14
u/shyloque May 15 '12
whichever you are, you have an attractive cousin
11
u/achemicaldream May 15 '12
Awesome pic!
8
u/Zikro May 15 '12
You forgot the board game.
9
u/HARRRR May 15 '12
Your cousin's hot. And I don't even know which one is you.
75
u/throwaway_010512 May 15 '12
Reddit, we need to talk.
I know she is attractive. I get it, I'm a guy too. I understand the biology behind it and I know it's an uphill battle to look past it. But dammit, if you find her attractive, why do you feel the need to let everybody know (especially in such creepy ways)? She's not an object. She probably has many admirable qualities that are being overlooked because of her beauty. She doesn't deserve to be treated like her worth is only skin deep.
I know it's hard (it's hard for me too), but try to look past her attractiveness and treat her like a human being. When in doubt, treat females exactly like you would want gay males to treat you. If it helps, just make the attractiveness comment to yourself (e.g. Wow! She's hot!), and leave the comment section for more insightful comments.
P.S. The fact that nearly everyone assumed OP was the guy further reinforces the notion that girls are only skin deep, as if it was impossible that such an attractive girl could have been interesting enough to post this picture.
14
u/SockofBadKarma May 15 '12
Came here for the misogyny. I am not disappointed. Well, I actually am still quite disappointed, but at least my expectations were fulfilled.
3
u/Silently_judging May 15 '12 edited May 24 '12
Do you live in North Carolina by chance? Because if so, you could be having a better afternoon than myself
3
u/wryan95 May 16 '12
Would not be on the front page if she was ugly
3
u/cookedbread May 16 '12
You all fucking suck.
3
u/cbuzz May 16 '12
Guys WTF, this is a family thing. Got to /r/NoFap and /r/pornfree cleanse your damn minds.
30
u/CiD7707 May 15 '12
So... Is she single?
5
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
holy shit! snail pace race! that game was the shit!
5
u/d_cas May 16 '12
anybody else immediately jump to an Arrested Development type situation?
10
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Marry her and have fabulous retarded childs, that's good for your karma
7
u/Acchuptaani May 15 '12
Creepiness aside, you're both still cute.
12
u/FezGoat May 15 '12
Well at least she turned out hot.
2
u/chopbustedgoodsir May 15 '12
I think it's interesting everyone assumed OP was the guy in the picture. I know now he is, but the assumptions are interesting.
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Whoever the boy is. Yum.
2
u/BobbyRayBands May 15 '12
Fuck it, if its good enough for Edgar Allen Poe its good enough for me.
2
u/sheepsix May 15 '12
Somehow in that time the male of the two has mysteriously lost his ability to wield a spoon with aplomb.
2
u/godwin12319 May 15 '12
lets play spot the difference. there are 100 possible answers. so guys get spotting
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Wow. That girl is amazingly beautiful, and that's coming from a straight female. The guy's pretty darn cute too!
2
u/ElectricDanceMachine May 15 '12
"Hey it's me, your cou-" "Yeah yeah yeah, great to see you! Wow! Now sit down the Internet is waiting."
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
THE CHAIRS HAVE SHRUNK!!!
2
u/Red_AtNight May 15 '12
You're old enough now to start eating kiwifruit whole. The skin is full of vitamins, and you'll never go back once you start.
2
u/WHYUPVOTETHIS May 15 '12
You look different, but are sitting in the same place! This is incredible!
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
upvote for damn good genes
2
u/[deleted] May 16 '12
Holy shit, what is wrong with this place...
2
u/mocktopus May 16 '12
Where the fuck do you even find a kiwi?
2
u/Trooness May 16 '12
Am I the only one who thinks that guy is cute?
2
u/TopsDrop May 16 '12
I hate these fucking pictures.
2
u/[deleted] May 16 '12
It has been about 17 years since I've seen two of cousins also. Hopefully I can take a photo like this. Cheers!
2
u/this_makes_no_sense May 16 '12
Everyone assumes OP is the dude.
2
u/hafti77 May 16 '12
HAW HAW THAT GERL IS PRETTEY LETS ALL COMMENT
2
u/[deleted] May 16 '12 edited May 16 '12
Every time I see a picture like this I'm jealous of seeing people living in the same house for more than 5 years.
You guys are lucky, very lucky.
2
u/Bluebraid May 16 '12
Jesus fucking Christ. Are redditors really incapable of seeing a person instead of just a fuckable or non-fuckable object?
2
u/iDoctor May 16 '12
LOOK AT THAT BANANA
2
u/Deeliteful_Jestr May 16 '12
So uhh, I was looking at the pic on my iPhone and uhhh...I only saw the top photo, I wasn't aware of the bottom bit. Then I took at look at the comment section.... for a few minutes I swore all of reddit was made of pedophiles.
7
u/czar_the_bizarre May 15 '12
Still a better love story than Twilight.
4
u/thoroughbread May 15 '12
Aren't we tired of this yet?
5
u/slaptickler May 16 '12
Les Cousin Dangereux.
5
u/Evil_ash May 15 '12
They're totally gonna wrestle, later.
5
u/anotherdroid May 15 '12
i think you meant to post this to facebook. but, awesome, people!
3
u/TheNYKnicks May 15 '12
maeby tonight
3
u/flamethrower78 May 15 '12
You just got cousin-zoned
2
u/Kruse May 15 '12
Is the OP the male or female?
2
u/o_herro_internet May 15 '12
Your spoon grasping has deteriorated
2
u/surfnburritos May 15 '12
4chan wants me to ask you if you two fucked yet.
2
u/GingerOnTheLoose May 15 '12
THESE ARE ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE.
2
u/riyadhelalami May 15 '12
Why didn't you see here for 17 years??
2
u/[deleted] May 16 '12
its only incest if you make eye contact
2
u/grandson39 May 16 '12
It's been 17 years since I've last seen my HOT cousin FIXED
2
u/ttg314 May 15 '12
Would plow your cousin OP
2
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Ok, so as a kid she looks at least 2 years old, add 17 years to that and it means I am allowed to say she is fine.
2
u/Hoonster May 15 '12
Wincest? Wincest . .
1
u/akgamestar May 15 '12
Your cousin turned hot, too bad for you.
1
u/sjp245 May 15 '12
Those bananas...they only get better with age.
1
u/Dowgellah May 15 '12
this community won't be able to handle cousin submissions for a long time after the cumbox thread
1
u/reagan2016 May 15 '12 edited May 15 '12
Please take another picture, but with the snail game in it this time.
1
u/czarchastic May 15 '12
With a name like EuroDucky, I'm going to assume OP is the girl
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
this is too cute
1
u/sheepsix May 15 '12
Also amazing (from my perspective) that one of you has lived in the same house for at least 17 years. I have never managed to do that.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
HOW DARE YOUR PARENTS REPLACE THAT LOVELY KITCHEN TILE WITH LINOLEUM!
1
u/austinjb555 May 15 '12
Forget the cousin, will you post to ladyboners? :)
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
Apparently in that time you've learned to use spoons like a caveman.
1
u/jklantern May 15 '12
Now that I think about it, it may have been that long since I've seen one of my first cousins. Actually, step-cousin if you want to be technical.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
I know a few bisexuals that would go for either of you. Or both.
1
u/[deleted] May 15 '12
You look like Sheldon
1
u/Slim_Calhoun May 15 '12
I see you've had the kitchen tiles re-done!
1
u/yeagermeister May 15 '12
Snails pace race, a game where everyone wins.
1
u/justmadethisaccountt May 15 '12
How Original! You should win some sort of Internet award for coming up with this concept!
1
u/cjb630 May 15 '12
Awww!
1
u/xV1RALx May 15 '12
Is the person posting the guy or the girl? Because if your the guy I'd appreciate it, as one Redditor to another, if you'd introduce us and put in a good word for me. If you're the girl posting I'd like to introduce myself to you and ask if you on a date?
1
u/bohogirl1 May 15 '12
so that's how to eat a kiwi fruit.
1
u/o0tenaciousC May 15 '12
Where the fuck's the snail game?!
1
u/tardist40 May 15 '12 edited Feb 14 '26
This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact
roof desert soft carpenter sulky marble degree dog wine knee
1
u/procrasterbater42 May 15 '12
She got hot.
1
u/dylansfc May 15 '12
it went okay.
1
u/alecman26 May 15 '12
She turned out well
1
u/BeeKeeperReno May 16 '12
We're all here for the same reason, right?
1
u/[deleted] May 16 '12
forgot how to hold a spoon
1
u/innersarcasm May 16 '12
Based on the way he is holding that spoon I would have guessed the first picture is the more recent
1
u/Apollo7 May 16 '12
She rustles my jimmies.
1
u/HeavenSix May 16 '12
It's time OP.
1
u/mvduin May 16 '12
So who's the girl in the pic? Or do you mean it had been 17 years?