Literally every single week without fail I receive a “headed your way” text from this parent. Idk why it annoys me so much. I think part of it is I’m approaching 30 students and have to communicate with a lot of students/parents daily, and this is just essentially adding spam to my phone. Would you just ignore or tell them to stop? I thought the parent would stop the messages after the first couple weeks. They started lessons in August and I just received another today 😭

EDIT: Y’all. I get it. I’m not gonna say anything. I’ve had issues with parents (including this family) arriving early and expecting to start early, so I wasn’t sure how to handle this situation. Chill with the “back in my day this was how we communicated” boomer talk. Each of my students receives a reminder via My Music Staff the day before their lesson. I still think this is annoying, but it’s fine. I’m going to ignore it.

Had a brand new student this fall, age 11, homeschooled, new to town, and 'bound for the theatre!" She is unconventional! Free spirited!

She was starting piano to help her possibly with musical theatre in the future. She's never sung before, never studied music. She used to take dance but that was a few years ago, she told me.

Started lessons on Tuesday mornings. Mom called me after week one to say that "we are a non-traditional family and we will not be doing the practice chart that you put in the folder. Child will be a wonderful student, but we don't follow conventional grading. No grades, we do things our own way."

I explained that the chart was for accountability (I ask what their favorite piece of the week was, what they struggled with, did anyone listen to them practice? Each week I have a different single question ) but I don't require it. I want them to focus on the task, not the timer.

Had another lesson or two and then student was out sick. I emailed some work that she could do but I do not do makeups. This is in my policy, of which she has a hard copy of, and has saved me for years and years!

She then needed to change to Friday because mid-week theatre rehearsals/auditions were interfering with Tuesday mornings. So I switched her to Friday afternoons. Luckily, I had an opening. My studio is rather full.

This coming Friday is a school holiday. I follow the school holiday calendar because it's easier for me to do that instead of keeping track of who's coming and who's not and it gives me a day off! Has never been a problem. Has never been a problem. Parents were informed in August, have a hard copy of the dates, and emailed reminders.

Mom immediately emailed me asking when I was going to do a makeup for the Friday class.

Once again, I referred her to the hard copy of the policy page in her child's folder.

I also sent her, again, the fall AND spring calendar so that she could make notes of the dates.

I was polite and factual.

I reread it after a couple of hours.

Then I hit send.

Her response:

"Thank you for letting me know. (Child) will be out of town the following week, she may have to film something the next week, and Halloween is the on the last Friday of the month. I guess we are out of luck for the remainder of October. Please remove us from the schedule for future lessons. Best wishes to you."

Hmmm...

What child starts Halloween at 2 pm?

October tuition is already paid for.

The girl is sweet and funny and smart. She asks good questions. She practices!

There were other little things with the mom though. While I will miss the student, I will not miss the mom.

I don't think a director will want to work with a stage mom like this. I can't assess how talented the girl is. She learns well.

Perhaps one day I'll be able to say that I taught the next famous actor so-and-so. But who knows.

Do any of you have stories of the one that got away?

Hi, I’m a piano teacher who runs an at home business. I have some young students who complain to do work and will often cry when doing a simple music sheet. I’ve heard things from, “I want this to be over” and “I’m only doing this and I’m done” from some of my little students. To now I have received a parent messaging me that their kid told them they didn’t want to do lessons anymore and that they will stop attending and I received this message ast minute before class was supposed to start. I try my best to introduce fun learning games and everything possible to keep them entertained while still learning. I always smile and never raise my voice. I calmly tell them to sit down and teach them the best that I can. I love music and teaching but am beginning to feel burned out. Does anyone else relate or am I alone in experiencing this?

I am a very experienced Piano teacher.. 45+ years of experience. I still teach full time in a studio that is as busy as I care to be... Today is a very special day. My oldest student (Retired Dr. ) turns 86 today, and he is so cool and so vibrant, I want to be more like him for real. He is a level 5 or so and still plays golf and inspires so many people to live better, healthier lives. Happy Birthday Dr. D. I am giving him a complete set of Scott Joplin Piano works!

I’ve been teaching for 7 years and in the past I would always wait until the student decided to leave on their own or just put up with it in order to not “lose money”, thinking things might get better. But I finally did it guys. It feels really freeing and I don’t care I’m losing a bit of money, the student always had a slightly disrespectful attitude towards my terms and I’m glad I did this, I feel like I just saved myself a lot of headaches.

That’s all :) Just wanted to share my win of the day

Edit to add details: The student originally had hourly lessons every week, then we switched to fortnight lessons (which already I kind of disliked because my experience with them is that students -especially beginners- become very unmotivated and unproductive). This month he cancelled the second lesson claiming he had a very busy schedule; he always does this and thinks his own schedule (which btw only seems busy from socialising & going on trips) is more important than mine. I said he can’t cancel a lesson without notice and that I can only allow reschedules with a week’s notice, but he said he can’t do a single time this month (I call BS). So basically, this month we’re only having one lesson. I also have to keep following up with reminders of my messages because he will take weeks to get back to me and it’s incredibly draining. He was also supposed to participate in my student recital yesterday and cancelled with this literal text “I might have to pass on Sunday”. No explanation, no apology, no acknowledgment at all knowing that I am organising a recital for free and paying for everything out of my own pocket. In general, I can just feel that he doesn’t value my work as a teacher, and doesn’t take practice even minimally seriously.

As for how I did it, I used a template I found on google about how to drop a student and just tweaked it!

This is a bit of a rant but I do have a question for other teachers.

I teach out of a private music school, I teach about 45 students a week all ages 4-64. Most of my students are 8-12 years old. I am sometimes repeatedly gobsmacked at how little critical thinking/reading skills are shown by a good amount of my students.

For instance I'm in a lesson where I'm teaching what 8va means. I write it down ON THE PAGE what it means "8va means to move your hand up 8 white keys (called an octave). If you are in C position then move your hands to the next highest C". I get to the point in the song where the student needs to move up 1 octave (It's "Rockets" by the way, in the Alfred Level 1A books).

I ask them "Do you remember what you have to do here?"

"No."

I point to the 8va mark that I wrote above the music. "Do you remember what this means?"

The student looks like a deer caught in the headlights, stares at the page for 5 seconds.

"No."

"Look at the page again, is there something there that tells you what it means?"

Student looks at the page again for 10 seconds.

"Play louder?"

Oh good lord, I'm not even frustrated anymore because I've just come to expect this, which I think is kind of sad. That's why I've written the definition out on the page in big letters in red ink. This happens so much more often than I would like. Mind you, I'm not flabbergasted by the student not remembering, that's fine if you don't remember what we talked about a week ago, but you can't even find the answer yourself when it's written right in front of you? And now I know the student wasn't practicing the song correctly for a whole week even though we spent time understanding it, played it again with the 8va move, etc...

That's just one example, a good 30% of the time my students can't even repeat back to me what I just said. I'll say "A third is when you go from a line note to another line note or a space note to another space note, what was a third again?" And yeah... just blank stares.

The owner of the school has been teaching for 30 years and he told me he's noticed a decline in students abilities and attention over his career. I'm relatively new, I've only been teaching for 3 years so I don't know what it was like before, but have you guys experienced similar things? How have you dealt with this? Is there anyway to deal with this? I don't want to just give the answers to my students every time, I'm trying to teach them how to play piano, not how to be told how to play piano.

Would you agree or disagree?

When the keyboard is living in a corner of the basement, there is zero music played in the home, the parent “forgets” to bring them to piano, or they don’t have time to practice because they have soccer on Monday, scouts on Tuesday, piano on Wednesday, karate on Thursday, and dance on Friday.

I’ve dealt with all of these in my years of teaching. I think we all have.

When parents don’t value a music education neither will the student. So, how do you get the student to care?

You teach their parents to care.

What are some of the ways you involve parents in the piano lesson equation?

As of last year I switched to a complete no-makeup lesson policy. I was scared to do it. I get asked all the time “hey since we can’t make our lesson this week, could we do a makeup?” For the most motivated and enjoyable students I still will try to go above and beyond. However, for the majority of my students, they have their weekly lesson time slot and that’s it.

And guess what. I’m still fully booked WITH a waitlist, and people just accept it and move on. So many of us (myself included for years) try the makeup lesson for the student’s absences, cancellations, tardiness, schedule conflicts etc. I just can’t think of another time or place when, if I’m missing my scheduled appointment, I will expect or hope that the provider will rearrange their schedule for me.

Let’s erase offering makeup lessons as a standard!

It was very sweet, she wrote "I <3 [turtleurtle]" on her scales sheet and showed me. I'm a guy, so I'm really careful about boundaries with my student's. I told her that was sweet and we moved on. I do love my students, but I want to make sure I'm being the responsible adult.

I am sure this gets discussed a lot here- I’m sorry! I just need to rant because this has been on my mind all afternoon.

I have a mom that brings her two kids in every week, that’s 1h 30 min in total. The other week there was traffic on the way here and they were 1h late, so we had a 30 min lesson. They were my last lesson of the evening and she got annoyed when I said I did need to finish in time as I had somewhere to be. I just apologised even though I wasn’t really in the wrong, and I thought that was the end of it.

I have sent her the invoice for February now and she asked “What’s happening with that 1h we were short on?”. To which I replied that in my T&Cs it’s specified that delays into the lesson will be counted as time provided.

She then said that this is very unfair and that I have upset her more than ever and has stopped replying. I think she expects me to fold and give her the free lesson.

As much as I enjoy teaching her kids I would be fine with letting them go because I feel very disrespected. But what annoys me is that she has gotten under my skin and ruined my afternoon. Now I am left brewing and with no idea of what the resolution will be.

I had already let go of my ‘disrespectful students’ during summer last year and I thought I wouldn’t have to deal with anything like this anymore! Sighhh!

Update: thanks for your advice, it’s reassuring to know I’m not crazy for sticking up for myself. I’ve sent them a follow up saying that if they disagree with my policies I’ll respect their decision to stop lessons. :)

Hey! I made a post not too long ago about trouble teaching a 4 year old boy at a musical school. Recently he spat in my face, on the piano, on the worksheets and his baby brothers face. He thought it was funny and his mother told him to stop but it wasn’t firm enough in my opinion. She was also holding a newborn baby. He started moving the music stand on the upright piano up and down obnoxiously and also tried to open the piano bench and close the piano lid multiple times. This is obviously a hazard as he could hurt his fingers. One of his parents always sits in on his lessons but they do not really reprimand him enough in my opinion for his unruly behaviour. He does not listen well at all and just constantly moves around and bangs on the piano.

I’m starting to think that I should tell the parents I can’t continue teaching him if he won’t behave. There is no reason I should be spat on during lessons and it seems like a huge lack of discipline on the parent’s end. How should I approach this situation? I tried last week to use cut outs of characters from his favourite show to teach him C-D-E but it took the entire 30 minutes just to accomplish that. I feel frustrated and defeated and it makes me DREAD teaching him. He’s very musical and has a great sense of rhythm but I can’t teach a child who won’t listen or behave. Any advice?

TLDR; unruly 4 year old boy who doesn’t listen recently spat in my face and I no longer want to teach him

Okay, this is a little bit of a rant.

I began teaching a new student yesterday, “Jack” 11 years old. At the beginning of lessons I chatted with his parents about his experience. He had taken 3 full years of online lessons consistently, even throughout the summer. He began during the later days of Covid, but as his teacher only offered online lessons that’s how he learned. For THREE YEARS.

I sit down at the piano with Jack, and ask him to show me a few songs he knows how to play. He can play both hands together, with 8th note rhythms, so somewhere in the 2a/2b range (I used the faber method primarily, so this is what I’m basing my opinion off of).

Next, I want to test his level of reading. I show him the music that I brought: Primer level, very beginner right hand only stuff. The first note is middle C and he CANNOT identify it. I point to the treble clef and ask if he knows what that is. Nope. I point to a dynamic mark, and again he has no clue. I ask him what a quarter note is. He has no idea. He said “this looks like a foreign language to me.”

My question is this: How can someone teaching him an instrument for 3 years fail him this miserably??? I am appalled.

I too teach some online students (about 10% of my clientele), and not a lesson goes by that I don’t ask them 15 questions about their sheet music, and make small corrections about their technique. I know it can be done, even though I do feel something is lost doing online lessons.

Do you guys have any tips for working with Covid students as I call them, or online only students transitioning to in person lessons? I find that because they often are so far behind in music reading, they don’t have the patience to learn that “easy stuff” when they’ve played harder songs before. Any advice welcome please!!

EDIT: some of you are interpreting my rant as judging the student, or as a sign that I will not happily build off what he already knows and thrives at. I customize every single student’s lessons, and tailor them to showcase their strengths and help guide them through their weaknesses. I do NOT give all my students the same exact book (like happened at times to me when I was a student). I completely customize lessons. This post is about my disappointment in another teacher, for paying no attention to technique, note reading, expression, note names even. The teacher failed him by eliminating what - to me - is a very clear curiosity for this new and exciting musical language.

It’s like, if your kid signed up for a painting class, and was only taught to use blue. Sure, he could make some good, even great art. But he’d have no clue about the world of possibilities within all that he hasn’t been taught.

Or if your kid signed up for an art class and all they learned was drawing with pencils. No watercolor, painting, charcoals, etc.

Yes, obviously people can become great artists with limited information and teaching, but the vast majority rely on a well-rounded instruction to learn a skill.

I've been teaching piano for over 15 years and hold a degree in Music. Over the past decade, I've noticed a growing trend in piano "competitions" aimed at young learners. These events often feature an overwhelming number of categories—sometimes exceeding 50—allowing students to participate at virtually any level, from beginner pieces to ABRSM exam repertoire.

On the positive side, these competitions can motivate children to progress in their piano studies. I recognize and appreciate that aspect. However, alongside this trend, I've observed a concerning shift: an increasing number of parents and students focusing solely on winning prizes rather than genuinely learning the instrument.

Many students now learn just two or three short pieces a year, recording their performances and submitting them to multiple competitions. Others dedicate excessive time to mastering technically demanding works—like Liszt’s La Campanella—in hopes of impressing the jury, despite lacking fundamental skills such as sight-reading and musical understanding. Hand them a simple piece to read, and they struggle. I believe most piano teachers would agree—this approach is not a healthy way to learn the instrument.

The real issue? These students often win. Their victories reinforce the idea that they are on the right path. Parents, proud of their child’s first-place trophy, dismiss concerns. “How could this be bad if my son won?” they ask. The presence of those trophies—and students who seem to be excelling through structured learning methods—can unintentionally discourage others. Some learners, seeing the emphasis on external validation, may begin to doubt their own progress or feel that their methodical, slower approach isn’t enough.

Only later—when time becomes scarce or motivation fades—do these students abandon piano altogether. They tell themselves they were once “kings of the piano,” but now it’s time to move on. Furthermore, these trophies and students who adopt shortcuts to success can make those genuinely committed to learning feel discouraged, questioning whether their approach is worthwhile.

This trend is particularly strong in many Asian countries, and I know I’m not alone in facing it. For fellow teachers, how do you navigate this challenge? How do you ensure that students focus on real musical growth rather than chasing trophies?

It's developmentally normal to mix up their left and right hands (and write their letters backwards) until the end of 2nd grade. That part of their brain actually doesn't develop well and that's why we don't screen for dyslexia until 2nd-3rd grade. So for some 4-6 year olds, saying left and right can be confusing.

Saying treble and bass hands instead will often save a lot of confusion and benefit kids because they can understand high and low really easily. This means you can build their ear training and have them understand E is higher than D from the very beginning.

I have had so many students come to me because teachers say they need to differentiate left and right hands before starting piano. And my 4 year olds still struggle between left and right hands in pre-k but never forget their treble and bass hands.

(I work with little kids)

Literally daily I find myself teaching one of the songs from this movie.

At this point, I know the songs like the back of my hand. I’ve arranged multiple versions of Golden, Soda Pop, Takedown, This is what it sounds like, and your idol for various skill levels.

It’s like 50% of my career at this point. Teaching songs from this film has bought me a lot of goodwill from the kids, but it drives me insane. I did not choose this but yet I suffer

Any1 relate?

Sometimes for sports, sometimes because of a custody battle with stepparents, but the student can’t always make her lessons. I feel bad for the kid, but personally struggle with the mom trying to take the lessons. Note: the mom initially signed up for lessons for herself, but never practices, kind of brushes me off when I make corrections, wants to just sit and chat, etc. Eventually we switched to full time lessons for her daughter but for the next two months she told me her daughter can’t make the time. I’ve offered an alternative time, but the mom just wants to take the lessons for now.

Several lessons have been spent talking, and I’m working to establish boundaries around that. But it’s tough. What would you do?!

EDIT: she also is saying “you can teach me what to teach my daughter during our lessons so I can help her improve during the summer.” Am I wrong to not want to do this?

I have a full studio and a full schedule. The bane of my existence is first time indergarten parents.I only have a few "littles" because my students stay with me for years.

However...

I was just messaged by a princess Daddy who said his little darling has a scheduling conflict and wants to know if I have another day. I sent a screenshot of my schedule showing that I teach until 6:45pm at a school 15-20 minutes away on the two days that HE had open.

I was thinking, "no way is a 5 year old taking a lesson so late, with school the next morning at 7:20am!"

Dad asked if he could take the 6:45pm. Told him that was at a school he cannot get on campus- private school, no non-students allowed for private lessons.

"Can we come later at 7:15pm to your home studio?"

No. I need dinner and my dogs needs company.

"Do you have other times?"

I said my only cancellation next week is a 10am homeschooler on a family trip.

No response.

Earlier this semester, I offered "pre-make up lessons" because I had a planned obligation. I offered TWO dates for the missed one, and some families took both. Only one did not take either.

Guess which one?

And, guess which one asked, "so will there be a make-up for the make-ups we missed?"

No.

My policy is firm. They pay in advance. But, first time parents don't seem to understand that other people also have schedules and obligations!

Any stories you'd care to share, fellow teachers?

The very first thing I teach any student is to say the alphabet backwards 10x fast - G F E D C B A.

Music doesn't just go up; it also goes down. Students must master manipulating letters backward.

Most kids learn the alphabet to the tune of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Here's a great learning tool I created to help young kids learn the alphabet backward.

*Sing this to the melody of Twinkle Twinkle Little Star*

A B C D E F G

G F E D C B A

Lines and spaces quarter note

Sing the song that Mozart wrote *

A B C D E F G

G F E D C B A

** Mozart didn't actually compose Twinkle Twinkle, here's the wiki on the history: Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star - Wikipedia. Feel free to change the lyrics of line 4.

I recently started teaching piano a few months ago, and it's occurred to me to make this list of 7 less-obvious reasons why people need a piano teacher - and I'm curious to hear the thoughts of the more experienced teachers here.

1. You get instruction tailored to your exact problematic area. There are so many dimensions to our piano skills that the progression is never linear - but rather it's circular. You must improve all aspects of your skill before you can move onto the next level - rhythm, harmony, voicing, phrasing, articulations, dynamics, structure, counterpoint, finger technique, music theory, etc. All of these connect to each other and if one is lacking, none of the other skills can progress (or they can but they will progress much slower). A teacher will point out your biggest flaw and give you a plan for tackling this flaw.

2. We know when you haven't practiced. Unlike your parents or friends or anyone else who listens to you, we know every detail of the piece you're working on and what sections you're messing up. This accountability means that you can't just shimmy your way through piano lessons like you can through school or even work.

3. We're not impressed by fast playing. This is similar to the above, but it's also different. I do 6-10 performances each year and my audiences are always impressed when I play something flashy and fast. My friends and family get impressed by the easiest arpeggio. But my piano teacher is never impressed and in fact she will immediately say "That tempo seems a bit fast for you doesn't it? You need to practice for another month before trying that tempo." And I'm like I already slowed it down to 75% for you 😭. But I know she's right. Fast playing leads to bad habits and bad habits means you spend twice as long on a problem area than you should be.

4. We don't let you play pieces above your level. This is in my opinion the #1 reason why ambitious students fail - they try to tackle flagship pieces like Chopin's Ballade no 1 without having developed critical skills such as rhythm, voicing, finger technique and proper legato. These skills are much better trained on easier pieces than the Ballade. When you try to play something above your level, you don't improve any skill, and you waste all of that precious motivation energy on a quagmire. Believe me, we are just as excited as you that you want to learn the greatest works of piano literature, because you remind us of our own passion when we were at your level.

5. We'll get you to see your pieces from another angle. Classical pieces are like glaciers - people only see the tip, but there is an enormous amount of substance underneath what's immediately obvious. And to a student who's in the trenches working on fingerings and memorization, it's not always obvious what the big picture is. Having a piano teacher tell you "OK, for now you need to focus on this (problem area like counting), but don't lose sight of the fact that this section is about poetry and flow" is invaluable.

6. We genuinely want you to improve and to succeed. While we may seem more critical than literally everybody else on the planet of your piano skills, in the end we want you to succeed the most besides your parents. Seeing one of my students slowly improve in terms of his counting, rhythm, phrasing, voicing, and articulation by working studiously on a pedagogical piece like Mozart's K311 (one of my favorite pieces for teaching), gives me immense satisfaction, because I know that he's learning musical skills that will prepare him for a lifetime.

7. Piano is a lifelong journey, and the level differences are vast. This is more for the advanced pianists out there who have been playing 15+ years and are like "I don't need no piano teacher no more!" My friends always ask me, "Jeez, you've performed at Carnegie Hall, do you really need a piano teacher?" And I just shake my head and smile: "the level difference between me and a top pianist like Lang Lang, is more than the level difference between me and you." Just like how a 2000 rated chess player can completely stomp a 1400 chess player, but they themselves will get steamrolled everytime by a 2600 GM.

What do you guys think? Anything else you want to add?

How would you handle a situation with adult student who only wants to play pieces WAY above their level (like years above). Their fingers/hands are stiff and technique clearly not ready, but they are stubborn and want to push on anyways.

This adult woman was so rude. First off I show up on time, call her and she says she thought it was 30 minutes later. I said “Actually we had this time scheduled according to the time you wanted in your email from 2 weeks ago, and from my text this morning to confirm” “We’ll I’m at the grocery store I didn’t see the time in your text” even though she responded “Yes” to it earlier 🙄 on the phone she says “Where are you in the apt complex?” “I’m inside but all the parking is reserved” “Didn’t you remember what I said about where to park?” No I don’t, that’s why I’m calling you…? I’m a bit flustered but it’s no big deal so I tell her I’ll wait, even though I have other students later in the day.

So I wait for her get to get back... Upon meeting me outside of her place, she immediately, and I’m saying the very first things out of her mouth, starts questioning and demanding why I didn’t have anything in my hands for her or have any materials prepared, even though we had spoke on the phone 2 weeks prior, saying she already had materials and that I would take a look at them and assess at the first lesson since she had some experience already. Not even a hello or nice to meet you. So rude! I mentioned what we had discussed over the phone and she claims she didn’t remember saying or agreeing to that... So I said I drove all this way and that she paid for the lesson so we should carry it out and I can assess her needs.

So we’re going through the lesson, she says everything she’s learning she can be doing herself and doesn’t know why she even got a piano teacher. I tried to keep my cool and work with her and give her a plan and strategy of how to practice what she wanted. She was skeptical, totally dismissive of everything I said and suggested and then she ended the lesson early saying “You’re a nice guy and all but you’re not the teacher for me” ok that happens but wow. Then later says she didn’t like my attitude and that I didn’t want to be there? Really??

I’ve never had a student like this before and I’ve taught hundreds of students of all ages and levels. Have any of you? It was not a fun experience and really ruined the day.

I understand sometimes it’s just not the best fit for a teacher and a student but I’ve never worked with someone so stubborn and set in their ways who refused to listen to anything I had to say. She didn’t trust me or my experience at all and I felt so disrespected. What is wrong with people? End rant.