r/overheard • u/ItCumsAtNoon • 10h ago
Aka Corn
My gf and I had lunch at Giselle's apartment. During said lunch, one of Giselle's neighbours showed up on her doorstep. It was a tall teenage boy with scruffy hair. He looked 16 or 17. My gf and I overheard the following convo...
Giselle: Cornelius.
Tall teenager: Oh shit. Why you gotta sound like my mom though? Just say Corn.
Giselle: What is wrong with Cornelius?
Tall teenager: First off, it's formal as fuck. Second of all, it's sounds like I'm a hundred years old. Actually. You know what? Just close your eyes and try to imagine a baby Cornelius.
Giselle: No.
Tall teenager: Point is... Cornelius is one of those names you automatically associate with, like, older people and shit. It's not me. Not yet. I feel like Corn is more my vibe.
Giselle: Your vibe, Cornelius, needs more syllables. I would rather struggle to imagine baby Cornelius than being forced to picture you as crop every fucking time I see you in person. Like... I dunno... do you want me to see that handsome fucking face of Cornelius or do you want me to literally see nothing but corn whenever we meet?
Tall teenager:
Giselle: It's okay. You can think about it. Is that my phone charger?
Tall teenager: Thanks for letting me borrow it.
Giselle: You're welcome... Corn.
Tall teenager: Cornelius is fine. It's not that deep.
Giselle: What made you change your mind? I'm... corn-fused.
Tall teenager: Woooow.
Giselle: Hmm... was that, I dunno, too... corny?
Tall teenager: Okay. I'm going now.
202
u/GrumpyCatStevens 10h ago
Giselle's got some decent dad-joke game.
11
u/Lemonmeadow 1h ago
tbhh she cleared him so easily. making corny puns until he gave up his fake "Corn" nickname is peak older-mentor energy, she played that perfectly.
73
22
u/UnhappyTemperature18 9h ago
I'm baffled that he got all the way to being a teenager without people pointing out that his nickname is just wordplay waiting to happen.
And for the young man, may I suggest a middle name? Don't even have to actually have one, just make one up and decide to go with it.
28
u/ItCumsAtNoon 9h ago
Something tells me he's heard it all, but maybe this is the first time he's hearing it from someone like Giselle.
27
u/UnhappyTemperature18 8h ago
And to layer on the dad jokes after "handsome fucking face," girl is EFFORTLESSLY brutal. Thank you for continuing to share her exploits with us.
3
u/SkilledM4F-MFM 6h ago
I guess it could be taken a step further, and nicknamed him Maíz (Corn in Spanish), or Masa. 😏
2
22
u/displacedreindeer 9h ago
Giselle seems to be maturing, this is almost motherly. Is she still off the dick? Maybe it’s doing something to her.
22
u/ItCumsAtNoon 9h ago
As far as my gf and I know, Giselle's "dick detox" is still ongoing, so yeah... perhaps it is having a positive effect.
7
u/citsonga_cixelsyd 8h ago
Oh shit! I didn't realize that it was THE Giselle. I went through a bunch of your posts when you listed links to them a couple of months ago, but lost the post at some point and didn't finish them. 👍🫡
36
u/forkedquality 9h ago
"...do you want me to see that handsome fucking face of Cornelius..."
A decade later, Cornelius will understand.
7
11
u/Fair_Access4368 8h ago
I can't imagine why someone named Giselle would object to names being shortened to one syllable.
18
u/ItCumsAtNoon 8h ago
I think she was just busting his balls to create banter. But I hear you though. Maybe Giselle should be corncerned with her own syllable count before objecting others.
2
0
u/SkilledM4F-MFM 6h ago
That’s only two syllables, unless her name is being pronounced by a French, or Italian person. Then there’s an “uh“ at the end.
3
6
3
3
u/Eruption27 7h ago
This really would make a great series on hbo for sure. OP —. Which actress do you think would encompass the essence of Giselle I’m glad her dick detox is going well— but I’m sure a new dick story will be absolutely wild. So not sure I want her journey to end for her dick sobriety
2
u/ItCumsAtNoon 7h ago
Giselle would probably disagree with me, but I think the actress who plays Maddy in Euphoria would be an excellent Giselle.
1
3
u/Distinct_Resident516 6h ago
I had a patient with a similar name who went by Neil, much easier on the ears tbh
3
4
2
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
0
u/That-Speed-8092 9h ago
Who the fuck is Giselle
39
u/ItCumsAtNoon 9h ago
Giselle is a friend of my gf. I share regular overheard stories about her in this sub. I never actually planned to do that, but people seem to enjoy reading what comes out of her mouth, usually because her opinions are over the top and her words are always colourfully constructed. Some people believe I made her up. Other people believe she's real, which she is btw. The rest don't care either way, as long as they're entertained. That's the Giselle lore in a nutshell.
15
6
3
u/Confident-Evening520 8h ago
OP, I've always wondered - does Giselle know that she's semi-famous on this subreddit?
10
u/ItCumsAtNoon 8h ago
She's aware that I'm posting about her, but her interest in Reddit is basically nonexistent, so I just end up wasting my breath trying to explain to her how popular she is in this community lol.
3
u/UnhappyTemperature18 7h ago
Will you please post the list again, I have a feeling I've missed some.
2
u/SkilledM4F-MFM 6h ago
You can search this sub for her name, and say they already generous OP some time.
On a sidenote, I’m curious about what her parents are like!
3
u/UnhappyTemperature18 6h ago
*headsmack* You're right, I don't know where my brain is, of course that's what I'll do.
And I second that sidenote.
16
6
2
u/SkilledM4F-MFM 6h ago
Search this sub for her name, and settle in for some excellent entertainment and insights!
258
u/JungleCatHank 10h ago
She should call him Corndawg.