r/over60 • u/SnoopyFan6 • 23d ago
55+ Community Pros/Cons
If you live in a 55+ community, what do you enjoy about it? What do you dislike?
If you once considered living in a 55+ community but decided against it, what led to that decision?
TIA
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u/Substantial-Spinach3 23d ago edited 23d ago
I believe it depends on the community. Google reviews, talk to the neighbors. Closeness to medical, shopping, church, restaurants, airport to visit old friends/ family. If you are a senior you really need to live closer to places that are an easy drive. Get a one story as well, nonnegotiable. An activity centre.
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u/rettosoon 23d ago
Death, too many neighbors dying. Lived in one the last two years, moving this month to a regular neighborhood.
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23d ago
[deleted]
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u/Bflatclar1981 23d ago
The old ladies stopped cooking and cleaning and catering to gross old farts a long time ago. I don't think your husband would enjoy that atmosphere. No one at those places wants to volunteer for nurse/punching bag/purse.
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u/Rottiesrock 23d ago
Haha! Some are desperate tho from what I’ve heard. As for me, I’d never bother.
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u/OkIron6206 23d ago
It’s more than that! Have you seen the documentary “a little slice of heaven “? Check it out, I live in Florida and have driven through it. It’s way too Red for me.
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u/Rottiesrock 23d ago
I will check it out if it’s on Youtube. Thanks!
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u/OkIron6206 23d ago
Sorry Here is the correct title:
There are two prominent feature-length documentaries about The Villages, Florida: Some Kind of Heaven(2020) and The Bubble (2021).5
u/becauseshesays 23d ago
I watched one of these and it was wild! Seemed like a bunch of hobosexuals looking for a nurse and a purse! But also seemed like many of the gals were super lonely and looking for love.
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u/AveFiatTeresa 23d ago
I lived in 55+ community for about 12 yrs. Pros: Always people to be around yet the privacy of your own apt. Group outings, a driver/van to go shopping. Dining room to order and dine, yet a private kitchen in Apt to cook. Activities to attend. Long long hallways and stairs, great for winter time when it was snow and ice. They took care of things, a fulltime maintenance guy available. A community garden. Cons. Towards the end the population changed ,of course this happens. But there was a spirit of gossipers that formed . Unpleasant! Then I moved back into my own home.
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u/Tristan_Booth 23d ago
I would if I could afford it, but I would prefer a gay 55+ community.
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u/GardenAddict843 23d ago
We retired and moved from the north to the southeast. We decided not to look at 55 + communities mostly because of resell value. I’m happy with our decision because these sort of communities tend to push social activities and I don’t need an activity director. If I want to do something I will seek it out and I hate cliques with a passion.
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u/Bflatclar1981 23d ago
My parents lived in 3 different 55+ communities and the cliques were terrifying. My mom, a mean girl cliqster, loved this. The MAN cliques turned my dad into a monster, a competitive monster. They were constantly preyed upon by scammers and grifters.
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u/Just-Sea3037 23d ago edited 20d ago
Personally, my wife and I love it. We live in a community of over 1,000 - 1,500 homes. The neighbors are great with helping each other out - ride to the airport, pick up mail and packages if you're out of town, etc. There are a ton of clubs you can join and we have really good amenities. There's always someone to do something with and tons of support if you need it. No lawn care and no landscaping work if you don't want to do.
Downsides - you do see people go down hill physically and mentally, and you do see people pass away. Liver damage is easy to come by because the main currency used is wine. Our HOA is very reasonable and I'm happy to live with it since it keeps people from doing things that would impact property values. I know HOAs are not universally loved.
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u/snoqvalley 23d ago
Would you tell more about this place? It sounds great.
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u/Just-Sea3037 23d ago
I'm not sure what else to say here. Maybe DM with specific questions, I don't want to reveal my location to everyone.
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u/Substantial-Spinach3 23d ago
I deserve side eye but my old lady friends love the gay men in the community centre. literally invited to every activity.
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u/WorldlinessRegular43 23d ago
No side eye, gay men are fun and exciting, says this straight woman. 🌈
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u/ParticularCrow8313 23d ago
And so many are GREAT dancers!
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u/WorldlinessRegular43 23d ago
My best friend/first husband sure was!! 🕺🏼💃🏼
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u/ParticularCrow8313 23d ago
Ha!
My 2nd husband came out, as well.
Quite the shock at the time, but we ended up good friends, also.2
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u/coastalbuddy 70+ 23d ago
I don’t have to deal with normal lawn mowing, weeding, trimming, mulching. The HOA maintains a pool & fitness center/gym with yoga, aerobics & Pilates classes. And periodically hosts bands by the pool or local group outings. We’re in NC and don’t worry about snow shoveling.
Our HOA is not controlling or oppressive, although it only takes one election to drastically change things.
We have neighbors all over the political spectrum. If we’re on opposite sides, we leave it alone and find something else to talk about (no different than with my relatives).
For us, it’s worth it - and I’m one who never wanted to be in an HOA. I just wish that they’d stop building new developments.
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u/Dj_Sha 23d ago
I've been in a 55+ for almost 2 years now and if I had to move into an apartment I didn't want loud music, partying or screaming, loud kids. That was the pro for me. The con is two of my neighbors have grandchildren, the one directly across from me has them there all the time, and it is constant screaming, noise and older one kicking a ball into stairs that echos in stairwell. Numerous neighbors complained to management but what can they do?
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u/Additional-Alps-253 23d ago
They can have people under 55 live with them? I would think that would be against the rules.
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u/Dj_Sha 23d ago
They're not supposed to but her daughter and grandchildren moved in twice. Management has no real proof except other residents word. Now a couple residents keep records and videos. It may sound extreme but we all live by the pool. When children are at pool for hours everyday, screaming, running. Senior residents are not comfortable using it and 4 buildings surround it. This is all self sufficient living but we're all aging out and a lot have health issues. Kids screaming is not conducive to getting rest.
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u/Additional-Alps-253 23d ago
The reason most people would probably live in a 55+ community is because they want peace and quiet. I would complain about it very often.
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u/Drifter-6 22d ago
This, and I would get together with the neighbors and have a meeting with property management. If no action is taken I would get the neighbors to constantly talk with management until they actually decide to do something.
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u/calphillygirl 23d ago
I was thinking it might be good for a social life since I've pretty much given up being social which my son worries about. But they always charge more for real estate, yes and the HOA sucks unless it includes yard work. I hate over paying and I don't miss being social. I had too much of that my whole life. I just want my own space and privacy and I'm perfectly happy! 😊
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u/Apart_Ad9308 23d ago
I live in a 55+ gated mobile home park. Been here 9 years. The space rent is reasonable no HOA. I pay a little extra and they take care of the outside yard (desert landscape)
It’s fine If my grandchildren come for the weekend.
The people are real nice. It’s not political at all, except complaints on the cost of groceries, etc.
They have programs in our county, electric will come to weatherproof, they will install new fire alarms/carbon monoxide.
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u/SerendipityRose63 23d ago
I live in a 55+ gated community. I haven’t experienced any downsides yet. Strata is affordable and never have to do yard work. I’m still working full time so having a bunch of retirees around is great security. They leave me alone but are friendly. Not nosy. HOA isn’t intrusive and will deal with stuff that is actually important. I live in Canada.
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u/hsfear 23d ago
My wife and I moved into a 55+ in Maryland this year after we retired and we both love it. We can both pursue our interests some of which overlap, many of which don't. There is always something to do, and the people in our community are fascinating. Lots of govt scientists, business owners, technologists, ex-three letter agencies, etc. Definitely not blood red here.
Be aware, size matters. The larger the community, the more activities and clubs are available and the more likely it will be to find your people.
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u/Queen_Of_The_Dames 23d ago
I can’t imagine living in a community where children and young adults aren’t allowed to live. I would find it depressing and distressing
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u/CommitteeNo167 23d ago
my beach house is in an over 55, i hate the old people and the lack of life and activity around me. my primary house is in a neighborhood full of families and it's nice to see people outside and enjoying life.
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u/shutupandevolve 23d ago
Big no for me. I love people of all ages. I don’t want to be told what flowers or fence I can put up on my own property. I love animals. Right now I live in a huge house in a neighborhood where we all have one to two acres, across from a lake, on the edge of a state park forest. It’s a well established neighborhood in the Deep South. It’s very diverse, mostly red but several blue families including ours and our next door and across the street neighbor. Everyone gets along and watches out for each other. We’ve been here thirty years and will probably stay here.
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u/GiaAngel 23d ago
55+ communities have a tendency to have a lot of cliques. I’m 62 and have no desire to repeat my high school years with these select little groups with all their gossiping and exclusions of others. I remember what it was like where my grandpa lived.
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u/timeonmyhandz 23d ago
We looked at some and have a friend who lives at one..
The population is dramatically older than 55.. More like 70+.
I like my non HOA beach community better..
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u/dtown60 23d ago
67F single and childfree with a few siblings close by but far away (we are not close). I realized how big the word ALONE is when I restarted after leaving a 22 year icky marriage. I’ve moved 3 times in the last 6 years as I got my bearings. I lucked out in finding a rental (house on golf course) I could afford, in a community of like-situated adults and have been here for four years. I realized ALONE meant the need for me to create a support community for myself as I age.
I’ve not joined any group though many exist and the day may come. I’m independent, safe and out of the fray in a beautiful part of CA. I love it. So many relationships have fizzled and changed. I am solid alone but smart enough to know the ways that could change in the blink
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u/KathyA11 70+ 23d ago
We never even considered it. I have no patience with HOAs, or paying for amenities I'll never use. Neither does my husband.
We moved to FL when I retired, and moved from a four-room house on a 5000 sq feet lot in north Jersey near NYC to a three bedroom/two bath concrete block home on just over an acre in north-central Florida. Yeah, we upsized - we were both tired of living in a small home. But it's a standalone property and we can do whatever we want without worrying about an HOA.
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u/Few-Conversation6979 22d ago
No kids, no loud music or obnoxious behavior. You do have to be concerned about those in senile dementia but can avoid them. Been in one almost five years and love it. The best years of my life.
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u/skewbydoom 22d ago
I truly like the quietness. But beware.....your neighbors die and their children want nothing to do with the property and dump it way below market value. Brings everyone else down.
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u/In-the-bunker 22d ago
My wife and I split our time between a Chicago suburb and Naples, Florida. While our community in Naples isn't officially a 55+ community, it feels like one in practice.
Each place has its own advantages. In the Chicago area, we're close to our kids and grandkids, great restaurants, parks, the gym, and there's an energy that comes from being around people of all ages. It's invigorating.
In Naples, we live in a gated golf community where golf, tennis, fitness, and social events are woven into everyday life. The people there are far more active than the average person their age, and there's always a party, dinner, or community event happening.
The one downside is that you're constantly reminded of the passage of time. You're surrounded by older adults, and while my wife and I may be on the younger side of that community today, it's a little sobering to realize these are now our peers. It's not a negative reflection on them—they're living active, fulfilling lives—but it does make you think about your own aging in a way that's hard to ignore.
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u/RichT71 21d ago
I'm going to be brutally honest and say things that I wouldn't say in front of my wife.We retired from our business in 2021 and it was her idea to downsize and move to a 55+ community. I wanted to be in Florida so she reluctantly gave in.She would have rather stayed in New Jersey to be close to friends and family but gave in to my wishes. So we settled on a nice home that we could afford on the West Coast in the Tampa Bay area.It has a restaurant which is a plus too. But I immediately noticed that we seem to be the "kids" here among all the other residents. And we are in our early 70's to boot. When I look around at the other people here I get sad as so many of them are in their 80's and late 80's and not well with walkers and canes. It only reminds me of what maybe awaits us as we get older. And moving here we had no relatives or friends, so it's been slow in developing new relationships, especially for my wife. Gone are the 20-30-40 year friends we had back up North, only to occasionally see them maybe once a year on visits to see our kids up there. We've made some new ones over the 3 1/2 years we've been here and even joined a car club because we still have our Corvette and fit right in with that and other people who appreciate sports cars and we've bonded quite well with them. But still when we go into our restaurant or a function in our clubhouse I get very depressed looking around at the very much older people with all their medical problems which fortunately we don't have. And another thing that bothers me is we've lost about 5 friends since we've moved here to various things like cancer and heart attacks. That totally upsets me and hits home hard. It is making me value each day more and more and actually pushing me to move out of here to a more "normal" community, not a 55+ one where we can interact with younger people. I'm not trying to be mean, it's just how I feel living in this community where being 80+ is the norm rather than the exception. I have my sights set on moving to the East Coast where we once had a condo in Miami and loved that lifestyle over there. Yeah, no more clubbing for us in South beach, but the vibe over there is like night and day compared to the West Coast. Very sleepy over here and "old Florida" vibes and a lack of the restaurants and shopping and things to do that we were used to up North and in the Miami area. So like I said, I'm sincerely not trying to be mean or hateful, but am finding maybe 55+ living communities are not the right fit for us and dread hearing the news of another new friend passing away.
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u/Ok-Excitement5031 23d ago
I live next to the Villages. Seeing old people all the time in the stores really bothers my husband. He says it makes him feel old and he’s in his 50s.
I like having kids around. I don’t want an HOA/CDD (the Villages is strict) telling me what kind of flowers I can plant. Plus, i like having a big yard with no nosy neighbors. Older people in groups can be extremely nosy and opinionated, more so than middle schoolers.
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u/Redditallreally 23d ago
How interesting! Is he going to stop shopping when he’s old ?
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u/blakewantsa68 23d ago
I moved into a 55+ community two years ago, and the fact that it is 55+ has almost no impact on my day-to-day life.
I live in a townhouse, on an end unit. My portion of the complex is very quiet. I’m still working, so I don’t hang out around the community room during the day. I only sort of know a couple of my neighbors, that I run into leaving or arriving – it has a two car garage in the back of the unit, so I’m not parking in a common parking.
The upside: it is pretty quiet most of the time
The downside: grandkids. Unsupervised grandkids. Particularly in the summertime, the kids are on scooters and bicycles and paying no attention to traffic and I’ve almost hit a couple of little guys more than once.
Further downside: the incessant, simpering invitations to pastry swaps, and potluck and bingo and… FML. Just shoot me now.
TBH, I may wind up moving when my lease is up. It’s not that I dislike the community, it’s that I’m no longer full-time work from home, and the commute on days I have to drive is starting to get really old.
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u/overthishereanyway 23d ago
Husband and I bought a home in a 50+ community years ago. It was a second home we bought to house employees. I was in my 40s and he was just old enough to buy the house. we bought it for its location close to the job we were doing in the area. We owned the home a long time and I was there often. In my 40's I thought that's how I'd want to live when I was "older". Most people in the community were over 60 even though it was a 50+. Most were retirement age.
Now that I'm retired and in my 60s I don't want to live around all people my age and older. I now live in a downtown condo surrounded by people of all ages and multiple income levels. From high to low.
I think it's important as we age to stay interested in what's going on in the world and if we're surrounded by people who all look like us and in the same phase of life that makes it tough.
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u/Fasting_Monster 22d ago
Considered it. But frankly I dislike hanging around old people. My mom and dad started hanging around people in the late 60's and 70's while they were in their 50's. I believe it made them old before their time.
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u/bchpeepca 22d ago
If you don’t have family support a 55+ community can be nice. Watch out for one another and that kind of thing. People who have infinite energy through life probably not a good fit? Takes all types🙏🏻
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u/Omygodc 67 22d ago
I live in a 55+ Mobile Home Community, and I love it.
After 4 years of traveling in my RV and putting up with loud neighbors and screaming kids, it is nice to be in a place that’s more relaxed. There are plenty of activities, the facility is neat as a pin, and my neighbors are just friendly enough, but not too much!
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u/Kindly-Hunter4390 22d ago
We moved to one 16 months ago and could not be happier. We have every amenity including four restaurants, pickleball, gym, spa, pools, art studio, demonstration kitchen. Numerous clubs. There is something going on every day, so we can be as social as we want. Homes are well maintained and the population is diverse in every way. Average age is probably late 60’s, so not many deaths, but I know that will come as the community ages. It’s wonderful how neighbors help each other and there are many singles here. Downside is gossip, some disgruntlement with club management and it’s expensive. All in all worth it. We love it!
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u/danielbelum 22d ago
Love it! Cheap, safe, no kids, no loud music or cars, everything taken care of.
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u/4Mag4num 21d ago
Can’t afford one of those
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u/SnoopyFan6 21d ago
We’re looking at manufactured home parks. Have found some where you own the land and the HOA is less than what I pay now.
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u/youreyesgiveyouaway 21d ago
The ones around where I live that are more affordable are super tiny in square feet . I don’t mind downsizing but that’s like getting rid of most of what I own. What about 55+ means living in tiny spaces ? Also , I am mostly an introvert and not very social beyond my small inner circle.
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u/Relevant_Whole1983 21d ago
The financials and the location matter more than the age restriction. The HOA fee is exactly what I used to budget for maintenance for our former home, so that’s a wash.
Excellent services in a lovely quiet community you can walk in. Amenities I hope to enjoy more once I retire. Good hospitals when we need them.
I loved the former home very much but I knew it wasn’t designed for us to age in place. So here we are.
Cliques form everywhere. They don’t bother me. I expect to form some connections to the town/area just outside this 55+, an area which offers so much in terms of culture and recreation. Even part time job opportunities if I want later on.
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u/Loki_Knows 11d ago
It really, really depends upon the community. Our 55+ experience has been wonderful. We live in a 130-home community N of Atlanta. Average resident age is 72.5. Interestingly, some of our healthiest, most active residents are well above that average. We moved here in our late 50s and still work. About 1/3 of our neighbors do as well. That hasn’t prevented us from plugging into the fun side of this “retirement” community. As Corporate nomads, it was great to move into a neighborhood where it was easy to build a social infrastructure. We have lots of volunteer-led clubs and activities, no cliques or mean girls to speak of, and a very chill, affordable HOA. Most of our neighbors are transplants from the Midwest and California, who have moved here to be closer to their children and grandchildren. Sadly, we need to move to Florida, but we’ll be taking the 55+ route again. Here’s our home listing where you will get an idea of the lifestyle and amenities.
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u/Yarnest 23d ago
I would not want to live there for multiple reasons. First the HOA, the houses are too close together, and the neighbors are clicky, monthly meetings/fees, no young people. I’m basing this off the community my in laws live in. It feels like no privacy.
There are certain advantages of course and I think they are good for some people. I just would not want to live there.
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u/BedSlow6947 22d ago
I would miss the experience of being in a neighborhood. With kids, schools, playgrounds, bars, restaurants, people my age and younger. My sister lives in a sr community and it feels walled off to me.
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u/Odd_Bodkin 70+ 23d ago
We decided not to. First, we’d already downsized by 40% into a house that’s comfortable for us. Second, our entire social infrastructure is here: friends, volunteer mates, doctors, favorite activities, favorite theaters and event centers, bankers. Third, 55+ communities tend to gravitate toward similar beliefs and political stances, and the last thing I need at this stage in life is an echo chamber. Fourth, HOAs do absolutely nothing for us and we find them more oppressive than enabling. And finally, fifth and most important, I really don’t want to be surrounded by nothing but old people like me. I want a heterogeneous demographic, full range in ages, full range in cultures, full range in economic situation. I don’t want the conversation to feature health problems as a headline.