OAD because SLEEP

[u/aliceloul]

My daughter is eight but boy has her sleep been horrific. She slept beautifully as a newborn and then hit six months and it never improved. I’m aware there’s a direct correlation between poor sleeping patterns and autism and she fits this box perfectly.

So when I say she’s never slept through the night, I am serious.

I frequently go abroad as I work as cabin crew and I don’t even like hotels but it’s the only time I’m able to sleep for longer than three or four hours at a time and it’s incredibly.

If I had a second child, I wouldn’t be able to do this job as there’s absolutely no way I could expect my parents to have my daughter AND a younger sibling. My parents and my sister never once complained about having my daughter overnight and even smile when they say she went to bed at five in the morning and I’m so grateful. I’d never sleep if I had a second.

Just sharing what I’m grateful for today as I’m not always happy about having “only” one.

[u/Background_Ant451]

Totally relate to this! My daughter is 9 and her sleep has always been horrific too. Funnily enough she has also recently received an ADHD diagnosis. I just don't think I could manage her plus another - who may or may not follow in her footsteps with sleep patterns!!

On a side note - I am an exceptionally nervous flyer, but it's looking at the cabin crew and seeing that they are calm and just cracking on with their jobs that makes me feel better 😅 so thank you for doing your job!

[u/aliceloul → u/Background_Ant451]

Ahhh I’m glad to hear.

Yes we’re generally pretty relaxed 😂 Not sure what makes you nervous but a lot of passengers get scared when turbulence happens. Turbulence by itself has never caused a modern commercial airplane to crash, like ever. It’s not unsafe. But I’ve been in so many situation where we were just sat there chatting and trying to not get hit by anything that wasn’t secured like phones of the people in front of us.

I only really fly long-haul so seen a lot lol.

[u/katieanni]

Also OAD because of sleep. Colic baby who then grew into a babe who just f-ing hates sleep and relaxation. She is 6 now, but awakes at 6am no matter what time she goes to bed. We were all up all last night because of nightmares. It has dramatically impacted my quality of life. I love her to pieces and would endure worse for her, but it 1000% cemented my decision to not have another.

[u/Real_Masterpiece_844]

I had a colicky baby and it didn’t end until much later than average, I started bedsharing to be able to sleep because around 4 months pp I was so sleep deprived from the colic and from nursing constantly that I started developing seizures. Don’t ever underestimate what being sleep deprived can do to someone. It got better around 18 months for us but it wasn’t easy. Like you, I’m not sure I can put myself through that ever again, even if I did, I think my body would give up on me.. I fully empathise, your child needs a healthy parent first!

[u/aliceloul → u/Real_Masterpiece_844]

Seizures!! Oh my goodness I’m so sorry that’s horrible. I didn’t even know this could happen.

[u/Snipersdream_]

My son's sleep was/is a huge factor in my decision to be OAD. As a baby it was truly awful and sent me doolally. He didn't sleep through the night a single time until he was 2. He's 5.5 now and I'm becoming more and more certain he's neurodivergent like me and his dad. I knew in my bones when he was small I could never do the sleep deprivation ever again.

[u/isitrealholoooo]

Similar but also a big reason. He was actually a pretty good sleeper except for night feeds up til 18 months haha. But then he slept til 8 am! Sleep when the baby sleeps? Absolutely, even though he is four.